Chương 1040: Day One Thousand And Thirty-Eight

Dear Diary, Yeah, in case it wasn't clear yesterday, I am still kinda reeling from the revelation that my Maw is not a one way ticket. I mean, not the way I thought it was. Then again I guess I never really thought about it. I figured it was like my regular Human Adjacent mouth, where I cram stuff into it and nothing ever comes out the other end.

Then again, and I am definitely having to hold my brain on this particular subject because it does not want to stay on topic, if I remember my cephalopod lore, they don't actually have buttholes. Poop chutes are not an octopus thing. No idea if cuttlefish and squid have them, but I'm assuming not. Thing is, they don't just vomit out waste from their mouth. Nope. They squirt that stuff out through their siphon. Which is basically what they use to breathe with.

And, for Kraken, what they're supposed to use to mate and share memories with. I would just like to make it clear that if the Fates decide to fuck with me by altering my biomechanics so I begin pooping out of my nose, I will turn them into a cranial rectal daisy chain. All six of them. Or as many as I can catch, and if some other Pantheon has Fate Deities, I will absolutely add them into the chain.

Just in case they're listening, this isn't so much a threat as a prediction of consequences, so it's in their own best interest to make sure that my own feces never comes out of my nose, or if it does make it very clear that the Fates never intended for that to happen. Possibly by showing up in person to attempt to stop it.

At this point it ought to be very, very clear that the idea that if I eat a Mortal Soul it can wind up somehow wiped clean of all memories and inhabiting the body of somebody I impregnate is fucking with me pretty severely. Okay, honestly, I'm not sure if 'inhabiting' is the right word. It's not like they're some kind of possessing spirit or something, they're the Soul of whatever person pops out of whoever I did the deed with. I'm really not sure if that's a thing my High Clergy can do or not, either.

Honestly, I'm pretty sure that in the long run, I'd prefer that. Because the idea that I need to spread my seed far and wide to keep Souls in circulation is just... I dunno... No. No, I do not want to do that. Getting my groove on with all and sundry while my ladies watch and join in is just the kind of slutty thing pre-teen me would have thought of as a dream life.

Spending quality intimate time with my most devout Worshippers, both as a reward for their service and as a kind of proxy intimacy with all my other Worshippers is totally fine, I don't feel obligated to do that. Or rather, I feel like it's a reward I should give, that I want to give, that I find joy in doing. Maybe my Gender Fluid is too viscous to enjoy the thought of being a breeding stud.

Weird, I know, with how over the top freaky hot I found putting kitten requisitions in Murder Mittens' kitten mitten, not to mention really enjoying playing baby roulette with Tallulah. Hell, doing the mpreg thing with Cherry was stupidly weird, but also stupidly hot in ways I'd never really envisioned before doing it. So it's not like the idea of 'getting someone pregnant' is a dealbreaker for me.

It's more that doing so because someone I care about desperately wants a child, or I really want to fill one or more of my dear ladies' bellies with one or more babies each, or best of all when both of those things come together just as hard as aforementioned ladies and myself is absolutely hot and enticing and all kinds of attractive, but forcing myself to be the piping bag of the karmic reincarnation plumbing is just, I dunno, not appealing at all.

Also, and this is maybe where I'm thinking about things that I don't want to think about, and it makes it worse that I'm thinking about it sort of compulsively, I'm entirely uncertain how that Soul affects the kid. I mean, it shouldn't affect them at all. Not really. No more than a Deific Soul wiped clean of any memory or thought ought to have an effect on someone connected to it.

But I swear on all I hold dear that while I watched some seriously fucked up pron back in the day, I never once actually got off on any of that. I mean, I tried, but it just didn't do it for me. It's like feet.

Don't get me wrong, I don't kinkshame, and if at some point some Worshipper who has done Cherry levels of work to provide for the Temple and my people has a deep and abiding need to have my toes all involved with his junk or something, a Deity's gotta do what a Deity's gotta do, but they just don't do it for me, not really. This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there. Yeah, I've joked about it before. But seriously, not my thing. Not really.

Okay, it didn't but as noted, I wasn't into eating or being eaten, and yet every night the dream selves of my most fervent Worshippers dissolve in my Maw. Which, to be clear, feels kinda like inhaling dry cleaning fluid to me when I take a dip, but they... Okay, saying they like it is an understatement, and now my brain is a pinball in a pinball machine where all the bumpers are thoughts that make it run screaming. At any rate, yesterday's class was class. Dad taught the first half, and I took over after lunch.

I let him have the lunch itself, because getting a Murder Mittens special bento box was definitely an appropriate consequence for filling in for me while I slept late. Not sure how he felt about the customary quick snog he got along with the delivery. No Tongue. Yeah, hearing that from my Wifiest of Wifes is not as calming as it might be, what with her sounding absolutely gremlin inside my head.

Like, I'm sure she did it to keep up appearances, because I don't think a lunch has gone by since I started teaching this Season without her and I doing a little casual tonsil hockey and grab ass. Eh, fuck it, if I can pretend to be Saffron Rae to help a bro fulfill his fondest fantasy, Marie can pretend Dad is me for a minute or so. Or act like she's doing so, since she obviously knew, since that's the only reason she wouldn't have been using her tongue as an aperitif.

Got home to Sigyn having the kids bring out their latest creation, some kind of fish stew. Not really my thing, but the kits loved it. Ria liked it. Heck, the only ones who gave it the hairy eyeball were Alex and Daya. Okay, Siobhan and I both kinda did, but not in any kind of way that would make the kids feel bad about their creation. Siobhan begged off even with Hailee snuggled up to her, and I just, y'know, ate it.

So much of the Academy food before I had Marie start showing off wound up mid, yet I still consumed mass quantities, I couldn't see myself not nomming stuff my kids made for me. Even if it was kinda fishy, and not in a good way. As we all lay there soaking in the Bath, I realized Saffron had me between her and the kids. She hid behind me, using me as a kind of blind for surreptitious kid watching. Specifically Anise watching.

At one point she realized I'd been watching her watch Anise, and she laid there with her mouth working until I quietly said, "I know."

"I keep wondering if the things I'm seeing are family traits, or parts of her Soul manifesting, or... Or just..."

"Us getting parenting right?" She blinked and looked up at me.

"Is this my Goof admitting to doing something important correctly?" I chuckled at that.

"Hey, I always try my best when it comes to important things."

"Says the woman who has repeatedly required Healing for injuries that should have been instantly mortal." I chuckled a little and squeezed her while watching Garde speak earnestly to Sigyn.

"Yeah, well. I said important. Like parenting. Not urgent yet far less important, like ducking." Oh, I got a look for that one. When I went to say something else, she shut me up with a raised eyebrow. We kept watching until we all fell asleep in the bath again. Of course this time I didn't sleep late. Had been dreaming about Marie taunting me by Shapeshifting my other ladies into the appearance of folks who ought not be involved with me that way then slam dunking them into my Maw.

Woke as my ass thumped onto the Bed, The Dress' boots holding my feet just off the ground, with Saffron looming just a little with the extra height from Glowing Midnight's boots.

"So you know, love, I am not actually angry with you. But the whirlwind of emotions within me has become too much for me to sleep, and..." When she trailed off, I pulled myself upright enough to reach up and touch her face.

"So you wanna let it out here in private as rough that might come across as angry?" She Grinned at me.

"You think you know me so well." I smirked back.

"Tell me I don't." She planted one finger on my chest and pushed me backward. Firmly enough that I bounced a little.

"Oh, but you keep forgetting that of the lot of us, I'm the one who has focused on my proficiency with partial Shapeshifting." I kept smirking.

"Kinda figured, what with the positions. What are you up to now, the low twenties?" She snuggled up against me, still Grinning.

"Oh, but that's not what you ought to be worried about." I stretched my arms over my head.

"Okay then. What should I be worried about?"

"Duck."