Chương 27: Furniture cannot commit treason

Bart stepped through the glowing temporary Annex portal and into the royal records chamber of Aramholm. The contrast was immediate, Tremendia's records chamber was a monument to vanity. The walls were layered in thick gold leaf, massive marble busts of King Aurelius lined the perimeter. Heroic murals depicted the king defeating wildly exaggerated beasts, and a sprawling ceiling fresco showed a benevolent Aurelius personally inventing bread and handing it down to grateful peasants.

Right in the middle of this fever dream sat a plain oak desk with an Intake Tray. Behind the desk stood three ordinary archive filing cabinets labelled ACTIVE CROWN RECORDS, DISPUTED CLAIMS, and OVERDUE COLLATERAL. Above the ornate double doors, a simple wooden plaque declared the space a TEMPORARY REPOSSESSION ANNEX. Gregor stepped through the portal a moment later.

He was holding a wooden clipboard he had found near the Break Room and had decided to wear his heavy white Veyric safety goggles pushed up onto his forehead. He felt this made him look kind of look very official. Gregor immediately began inspecting the palace. He walked up to an enormous gold bust of the king and tapped the base with his pencil.

"Structural vanity." Bart looked over from the Intake Tray.

"That is not a recognised classification." Gregor wrote it down anyway.

"It is now." He continued his circuit of the room, making loud, scratching notes on his clipboard(without writing anything of value). He noted that the bust was dangerously top heavy, that a decorative spear held by a suit of armour pointed menacingly inward towards visitors, that one particular royal portrait was mounted slightly crooked, and that there were far too many patterned rugs situated near open candle flames.

"Gregor," Bart said eventually.

"You are conducting a records inspection."

"The records are surrounded by hazards," Gregor replied without looking up. This seemed to be an excuse by Gregor to avoid practising his newly learnt reading skills. Bart turned his attention to the far corner of the room. A man in rich, though slightly ink stained, robes was pressed against the gilded wall, staring at the plain oak desk with a mixture of terror and curiosity. Bart approached him, stopping exactly at the invisible boundary of the Annex. He introduced himself formally.

"Bart Sanders. Keeper of the Infinite Archive." Thaddeus looked at the plain oak desk, then up at the glowing administrative plaque above the door.

"Yes," he said weakly.

"I had gathered that, we have met briefly before". Thaddeus was deeply nervous, and Bart understood why. He technically controlled the Crown records now and Thaddeus, as the Royal Historian, had spent the last 20 odd years helping maintain the king's propaganda. He did not yet know whether this strange, bespectacled man intended to punish him.

"I am here to conduct the mandated Sovereign Collateral Assessment," Bart said, his voice even and professional.

"To complete it, I will require the official royal chronicle, your sovereign seal records, all succession documentation, the supporting evidence for any disputed royal claims, and the provenance records for the overdue journal." Thaddeus became visibly uncomfortable at the words supporting evidence. He shifted his weight, his eyes darting toward the floor. It was a small tell, but a glaring one. Bart noticed it immediately, though he did not push the issue.

Though before he could ask a follow up question, the heavy double doors of the chamber slammed open. King Aurelius stormed in again, having left to consult his coterie just a little before. He was flanked by four heavily armoured royal guards and an Elite Royal Mage. Several frightened advisers scrambled to keep up with the king's furious stride. Clutched tightly against Aurelius's chest was a leather bound book. The Private Journal of King Aurelius -Original.

Gregor immediately slid back towards the oak desk and leaned in.

"Boss," he whispered.

"The book."

"I see it," Bart said.

"I could take it." said Gregor"You will not steal a library book from the borrower," Bart said firmly. Bart stepped forward to the edge of the Annex boundary and addressed the king.

"King Aurelius. I am here to collect the overdue holding and resolve the Sovereign Catalogue Lien."

"I refuse!" Aurelius bellowed, his voice echoing off the frescoed ceiling.

"It is royal property! You are a jumped up clerk, and this 'Archive' has no authority in my kingdom. Our collateral agreement was entirely metaphorical. Kings cannot have overdue books! Time itself should respect the nobility!"

"The due date was not metaphorical, Your Majesty," Bart replied calmly.

"And all 17 declarations of royal immunity have already been received and rejected." Aurelius's face turned a violent shade of plum.

"The due date was not metaphorical? You dare speak to me of due dates while you squat in my palace?" He pointed a trembling finger at the oak desk.

"I ordered this hideous wooden bureaucracy removed an hour ago!" The captain of the guard flinched.

"Sire, we didn't know what crime to charge the furniture with—""Then arrest this …this clerk, librarian or whatever!" Aurelius bellowed.

"And throw the filing cabinets in the dungeon!" The four royal guards drew their swords and charged toward the desk. The moment their boots crossed the invisible threshold of the Annex, a blue System notice flashed in the air. ARCHIVE ANNEX JURISDICTION ENTERED Registered environment: Sovereign Records Annex Standing patron regulations active The leading guard raised his sword. RULE VIOLATION: WEAPONS PROHIBITED The weapons simply refused to cross the boundary.

The steel blades jerked backwards, ripping themselves out of the guards' armoured gauntlets. A sleek wooden rack materialised beside the Annex entrance. The four swords floated neatly into the rack, slotting into place with a click. A small paper claim ticket appeared in the air and drifted down onto the floor. Gregor clapped his hands quietly.

"Very organised." Enraged, the captain of the guard lowered his shoulder and charged directly at Bart. RULE VIOLATION: NO RUNNING The captain's furious sprint instantly, magically decelerated into an extremely dignified walking pace. His face remained contorted in a scream of rage, and he leaned forward but his legs moved at a polite, leisurely speed. Gregor leaned on his clipboard.

"He looks very angry."

"He seems to be walking responsibly," Bart said. Several other guards attempted to move faster, trying to rush the desk. The Annex repeatedly and effortlessly reduced them to a browsing stroll. Eventually, they reached the filing cabinets. Groaning with effort, two guards tried to lift the OVERDUE COLLATERAL cabinet to carry it away. If you encounter this tale on Amazon, note that it's taken without the author's consent. Report it. The cabinet did not move a single inch.

ACTIVE INSTITUTIONAL HOLDING Removal requires Keeper authorisation. Aurelius watched four armed royal guards lose a confrontation with office furniture for a 2nd time today. Something inside the king finally broke.

"ARREST THEM! ARREST THEM ALL!" Aurelius screamed.

"ON CHARGE OF HIGH TREASON!" A blue System notice blinked calmly above the desk. FURNITURE CANNOT COMMIT TREASON Aurelius whirled towards the Royal Mage."Do something!" The Mage remained very still.

"Your Majesty..""Magic! That is why I employ you!". The Mage looked at Bart who gave him a polite nod which made him even less happy.

"We have encountered the Keeper before, Sire."

"But that was in the Archive, this is in Tremendia-my kingdom; mine" screamed Aurelius That was technically true. Reluctantly, the Mage raised both hands, orange fire gathered between his palms while Bart watched with a bit of concern. The Mage launched the spell, the fireball crossed 3 ft of the royal records chamber then touched Archive jurisdiction. UNAUTHORISED MAGICAL DISCHARGE DETECTED OPEN FLAME AND DESTRUCTIVE MAGIC PROHIBITED IN RECORDS AREA And completely vanished.

The Mage stared at his hand, Bart and then at the plain oak desk.

"Sire," he said quietly, "the room has jurisdiction."

"Destroy the room!" The Mage looked around at several thousand royal documents.

"With respect, Sire, I believe that may also be illegal." The Mage quietly, respectfully, took three more steps backwards and said nothing. Humiliated and entirely out of options, Aurelius turned his fury on the only target left in the room he still controlled. He pointed at Thaddeus.

"You! Historian!" Aurelius ordered.

"Record a new official entry. Record that the Infinite Archive unlawfully invaded Tremendia, attempted to overthrow the Crown, and surrendered unconditionally after witnessing my superior legal reasoning!" Thaddeus flinched. He moved slowly to his mahogany desk, standing just outside the Annex boundary. He reached for his quill. His hand shook violently as droplets of ink splattered across the parchment. King Aurelius noticed the hesitation.

"Write." he said forcibly! Thaddeus lowered the quill towards the page. It was then that Bart intervened. He simply asked a question.

"Is that what happened?" Thaddeus froze. The quill hovered a fraction of an inch above the paper. Aurelius snapped, "Of course it happened. I just said it happened." The Annex responded immediately. UNVERIFIED HISTORICAL SUBMISSION DETECTED Bart kept his eyes on Thaddeus.

"You are the Royal Historian." Thaddeus swallowed hard, a drop of sweat rolling down his temple.

"Yes."

"Then I am asking the historian," Bart said softly.

"Is that what happened?" It was Thaddeus's first real moral test. He had survived two decades in Aramholm by simply nodding and recording whatever delusions Aurelius demanded. He could not bring himself to say yes. But looking at the furious king, he was not brave enough to openly say no, either. So, he did nothing. He held the quill in the air. That silence in the gilded room was his very first act of rebellion. Bart turned his attention to the massive royal chronicle resting on Thaddeus's desk.

He opened the active Sovereign Collateral Assessment and registered the chronicle as the kingdom's primary official record. SOVEREIGN RECORD AUDIT Verified claims: 8% Unsupported claims: 61% Conflicting provenance: 23% Impossible chronology: 8% The text expanded, offering a rapid sample of the most glaring historical offenses. Claim: King Aurelius invented rain. Supporting evidence: None. Claim: King Aurelius discovered the moon. Supporting evidence: Moon predates claimant. Claim: King Aurelius invented bread.

Supporting evidence: Multiple prior civilisations object. But as Bart scrolled through the audit, a much more important warning flared in blue letters. INSTITUTIONAL RECORD CONFLICT DETECTED Primary sovereign chronicle: Registered Supporting provenance: Insufficient Historical inconsistencies: Extensive Record completeness: 94% Unregistered historical material: Detected Keeper correction authority: Insufficient Potential procedure: Official Record Correction Requirements unmet Bart stared at the final two lines.

The Archive could identify the contradiction. It could not yet correct it. Before he could repair Tremendia's official history, he would have to establish a legitimate standard for deciding which record deserved institutional recognition. He looked back at the Royal Historian.

"Thaddeus. What records contradict this chronicle?" Thaddeus went completely still. Aurelius stopped shouting. For the first time since the Annex had appeared, the king looked genuinely worried rather than merely angry.

"There is no contradictory evidence," Aurelius said, his voice dropping to a dangerous, flat tone. Bart ignored him. He looked steadily at Thaddeus. Thaddeus said nothing, his knuckles white around the quill. Beside Bart, Gregor's eyes were darting around the room. The thief's instincts, honed by years of finding hidden vaults and secret compartments, kicked in. He noticed that Thaddeus kept nervously glancing towards a particular bookshelf in the corner.

He noticed that the dust was slightly disturbed around the base of that specific shelf, and that one of the decorative cabinets beside it was misaligned by a fraction of an inch. Most importantly, Gregor noticed that Thaddeus's free hand kept drifting nervously towards a small, hard shape concealed inside his left sleeve. Gregor quietly moved beside Bart.

"Boss."

"Yes."

"The historian is guarding something." Bart did not accuse the man. He simply adjusted his glasses and asked, "Thaddeus, is there another record?" A long, suffocating silence filled the room.

"Do not answer that," Aurelius commanded.

"I did not ask the king," Bart said. Thaddeus looked at Aurelius, whose hand was resting on the hilt of his jewelled sword. He looked at his official royal chronicle, filled with two decades of mandated lies. He looked at the plain oak Archive desk, and finally, he looked at Bart.

"Yes," Thaddeus whispered.

"Seize him!" Aurelius screamed, pointing at his historian.

"Treason! Throw him in the dungeon!" The royal guards, freed from their attempt to lift the filing cabinets, immediately pivoted and lunged towards Thaddeus.

"Mr. Thaddeus," Bart said sharply.

"Please step inside the Annex."

"Thaddeus," Aurelius warned. Thaddeus looked down at the thin blue line glowing across the marble floor and stepped over it. COLLATERAL AUDIT WITNESS IDENTIFIED Witness: Thaddeus, Royal Historian Status: Required participant Interference: Prohibited during active audit The guards crashed into the invisible institutional shield of the Annex boundary and bounced off, unable to touch him. Aurelius struck the barrier with his fists, entirely furious. Bart looked at the king.

"Until this inspection is complete, your historian is part of an authorised sovereign record audit." Thaddeus stared at Bart, his breath catching in his throat. In twenty years of serving Aurelius, nobody had ever worried about his safety. Bart turned towards the specific bookshelf Gregor had noticed.

"Show me," Bart said. Thaddeus hesitated. His hands shook as he slowly reached into his sleeve. He withdrew a small, heavy iron key. Behind them, Aurelius pressed his hands against the blue barrier.

"Thaddeus," the king said. There was a genuine, chilling warning in his voice. Thaddeus looked back at the king he had served for twenty years. He thought about the rain, the moon, the dragons, even the bread. Then, he turned away. Thaddeus walked to the corner bookshelf, reached behind a false panel in the wood, and placed the iron key into a tiny, hidden lock. Click.