Chương 1047: Day One Thousand And Forty-Five

Dear Diary, Y'know, there are times when I stumble into some kind of awesome confluence of events purely at random, times when I set up all kinds of weird dominoes like some kind of Chekov's Armory, and some occasions where I get someone else to do the planning and just execute that motherfucker like some kind of executioner person, but I think my favorite times are when all three of those things Just Happen.

No, I am not actually talking about sex right now, although I can totally see where someone might think that. But my first two partners in the here and now weren't really me seducing somebody or anything even close to that. They weren't even somebody else going through some weird ass plan to seduce me, the way Karen or Tallulah might be categorized in some kind of nookie registration system.

They were each, Saffron and Marie both, things that Just Happened because of the situation, the attraction between us, and maybe, not to put too fine a point on it, the sheer pent up appetite in each of them. Okay, maybe in me, too, now that I think about it, especially if I think about it the way I do now. Meaning thinking about sex as physical intimacy, not just swapping bodily fluids. Because back in the day I might have had sex now and then, but I don't think I ever really had anybody I was intimate with.

I think I fooled myself into thinking I was because he was hot, or we got along online, or any one of a number of things, but frankly I've been more intimate with Panther than I was with any of the dudes back at Eastside. At any rate, I'm not talking about sex right now.

Okay, I just was, because I'm me, but still what I'm talking about are those times when I do my best to plan something out and make little preparations, then realize that somebody else has been making plans for the same thing I've been planning to do, but not only are our plans fortuitously compatible, but the universe itself seems to have nudged all those little things that normally interfere out of the way.

So after spending all day yesterday trying to figure out how to make sour cream, and yes thank you I realize now exactly how Mom made her creamy fish dish have that sour tang to it, no it was not citrus, yes I am an idiot, don't look at me, shortly before sunrise I found her listening to Garde and the Musical Girls as they practiced a new song.

"Hey, Mom?" Without turning from the band, she murmured, "what did you need, Tabitha?"

"Any chance I could get you to maybe teach me some fish recipes? Like, ones you can do at a cookout?"

"A cookout?" I didn't expect that to be the linguistic hangup, but I rolled with it.

"Yeah, I kinda wanted to take Lindsey and the girls camping for her birthday, and there's a stream there, so they'll probably catch some fish, and I wanted to figure out some ways to cook it so it won't wind up suffering in comparison to all the stuff you and Marie and I cook here at home." She chuckled a little, glancing at me without turning her head, as the girls continued playing and singing. Okay, the other three were singing, Garde was doing some kind of lyrical spoken word poetry or something.

Not exactly rapping, but not not rapping either. Like maybe something Drake would do, but without the kid diddling. When the current verse ended and Garde joined the other three kits singing the chorus, Mom said, "you mean the reason I've stockpiled the ingredients for campfire cooked fish for the past few days?" I just sat there, mouth hanging open, while she chuckled. She pulled me in next to her with a side hug, and together we listened to the rest of the recital.

When dinner rolled around, Marie had a whole assed vegetarian banquet set up. Much like the kits, she's definitely a carnivore, but that doesn't mean she can't do meat free. The core of it was a salad made of corn, peas, carrots, onions, something else vaguely onion tasting, but with a different texture, leeks I think, plus three different kinds of beans. She'd made half a dozen kinds of dressing, not to mention a few savory veggie pies.

At the end of the meal, she brought out the cake, which left Saffron maybe a little less than ecstatic, what with it being only lightly sweetened carrot cake, but frankly I think I might have been the only one that noticed my Kitten's disappointment. At that point I brought out the birthday girl's present. A while back when I was thinking about what to get her, I eventually settled on a whole assed infantry field kit. Well, the stuff they use for camping out in the rough for any length of time, anyhow.

All of it was older stuff, or at least stuff from Army surplus stores. Heavy canvas stuff, everything from the outfit to the ALICE gear to the tent. When I pulled it over it smelled, I dunno, kinda musty, but apparently along with Kitchen Witchery I've also learned some bits about laundry. Not that I've got a Skill for it, at least not that one I noticed from my ill-fated attempt at Status, but I managed to replace the musty smell with something closer to new blue jeans.

I really hope I didn't clean any preservatives out of it, but then again there's the whole assed reason I snagged canvas gear instead of high tech modern shit. Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings. It's the Crossbows. Yeah, we've got some cannon now. I'm not sure, but I think they're even breach loaders. Not sure if they're rifled or smoothbore, but the thing is, they're more or less fixed pieces set into the broadsides of the Tentacles.

When it comes to arming our Volunteers or even our Heroes, we're still using Crossbows. Because while we've managed to throw together a few dozen decent cannon, and the Tentacles have enough ammunition that they don't have to ration it that I know, we have literally thousands upon thousands of Crossbows, and we could churn out thousands more if we needed to.

Shit, we've got at least two generations of the things now, 'old' ones and 'new' ones, and the new ones are improved enough that the old ones have been relegated to training, right next to the fucked up bows and shitty practice swords. Same thing with the canvas. I dunno if Marie could fix high tech materials or not.

If I had to bet one way or the other, I'd bet she could, both because I'm not gonna bet against the Wifiest of Wifes in a Core Wife Skill Contest, and also because I'm not betting against my Wifiest of Wifes even if I know she's gonna lose, because I don't roll like that. Thing is, I don't have to make that bet. I got canvas stuff because I know she can absolutely fix it as good as if not better than new if and when it gets damaged.

Lindsey's not the sort to wreck stuff deliberately or by negligence, but she's also not the sort to leave her kit unused forever, and shit happens. At any rate, when she'd finished her cake, i called out, "Lindsey! Heads up!" When she looked, I tossed her the whole assed kit. Okay, I feel a little bad, because the kits have grown so fast, and Lindsey is so clearly more psychologically mature than most of them, that I don't really grok that she's still kid sized.

Like, maybe freshman in High School sized now, but still not anywhere near Isadora sized. Then again, Marie isn't fuckin' Isadora sized. I remember that thought about Menace carrying Lachlan around in her purse like a chihuahua, and now I had the same thought about Isadora and Mr. Driver. At any rate, I didn't throw the kit anything like hard, but right before it got to her I really realized that the whole probably weighed as much as she did. Luckily I didn't have to catch her, because Isadora did.

Not even rude or obvious about it, she was just there, standing behind Lindsey so when Lindsey stumbled backward, she thumped into Isadora, who didn't fuckin' move in the slightest except to cushion Lindsey a little.

"What's that?" Isadora asked. Lindsey looked at me over the duffle and gear.

"My present?" I nodded.

"Yeah. Sorry, it's a little bigger than I thought it would be." She shrugged, then started opening stuff up. She didn't dump the duffle like I would have; instead she pulled out one thing at a time. Before she had the third big piece of canvas out, Alex charged back into the room; I hadn't even noticed her leaving. Neither had anybody else, I don't think, but she'd apparently been reading those old SMARTbooks I got her.

"Here! I got the instructions for those right here!" Yeah, I think part of being a parent to older kids is knowing when to step back and just, y'know, be there. Not interfering, not pushing them, not even helping in any real way unless they asked for it. Just witnessing them, letting them know I'm there if they need me, and letting them know that in my opinion, they do not. Need me. Wow. That kinda hits different from this end.

I want my kids to want me around forever, but I don't want them to need me forever in any kind of practical sense. I don't want to cripple them just so they can't get away or some shit like that. I don't need to clip their wings; if they choose to fly away, they fly away. I just hope they'll always know they can come back whenever. Not like they're ready for that yet, anyhow. The oldest one is, I dunno, maybe double digits. Maybe. Generously. Although they are growing like weeds.

Anyhow, Lindsey and Alex and the rest of the girls cataloged everything, and then Lindsey repacked everything, almost like she remembered exactly how it'd been packed in to start with. Made me feel some kinda way, because it had taken me like half a day just to pack it properly. Alex helped her get into the ALICE gear, and if Isadora walked kinda close in case Lindsey stumbled, she didn't do anything so obvious as holding her sister up by the backpack or anything.

As she broke off to put it in her room on the way up to the Bath, I called out, "don't put it too far away; we'll be heading out to the campsite in the morning." She turned, looking at me curiously.

"Are you sure?"

"Yep. You, me, and anybody else who wants to come along at least." I hadn't really thought about it, but Siobhan insisted on coming along when Lindsey asked her. I really hoped that it wasn't floating in the Bath with Hailee and I right there that convinced her. Dreamt of another round of baby name arguments. I think, at least. Apparently one of them brought up the imagery of Siobean's conception as some kind of evidence their name of choice was superior.

Sometimes I really wish my ability to understand my ladies in my dreams wasn't so erratic. Siobhan came with us in the morning, but she absolutely did not walk. She got princess carry treatment from the Homestead to the campsite. Which was wrecked. Apparently the Spartans had been here, at least that one asshole who stabbed Hailee, Siobhan, and Siobean. So proud of my girls, Lindsey especially. She didn't cry or pout or any of that. Just sighed, set her pack down, and got to work fixing things.

The rest of the kids did the same, even Boy and Girl, who need to get with the name picking, but I digress. I still don't know how to feel about a little snippet I overheard between Boy and Lindsey.

"Aren't you worried?"

"About what?" He reminded me so much of the dudes from ROTC, who'd be all brave and bold and still worried about shit like bugs when we went camping. Wanting to be macho, but clearly just, y'know, a kid.

"Them. Coming back." Lindsey shook her head.

"Mama's here. So are they." That's when I noticed that the kits, while mostly doing their part of cleaning up the burned, broken, and scattered bits of the camp and treehouse, had also formed a perimeter around their older, smaller sisters. So proud of them, even if I would tear every Spartan on the planet into teeny tiny pieces before I let them get near my kits. I still kinda left them to it, both because of that letting them do their thing part, and also because I was still kinda floating from what Lindsey said.

"But mostly because Mama's here."