Chương 7: You’re along for the ride. I'm driving.

I'm driving.

>>Rise and shine, boss!

"Ahh!" George woke up with a shout as it felt like a buzzer went off inside his whole body. >>Just your friendly neighborhood spider alarm.

"Jesus. Don't do that again," George said, "More like a brain taser." >>Got it. Turn down the volume next time.

"Is that why my head hurts?" George checked the trial timer. 05: 39: 29 >>Ah. About that. You may be experiencing a slight headache because you had a busy night. Well. Your body did. >>You know how when you move into a new house, you sort of like some parts of it, but you also have to…hmmm. How do I say this? Personalize it? You know? Make it your own.

"Don't change my brain, Nod. It is not your new house." >>We could argue semantics all day. >>In the meantime, why don't you start clicking that button, and I'll give you an update until that next level comes. >>First off, before you go thinking that your new brain spider friend ruined your previously pristine brain, there was a lot of other stuff in here already. Programming. Nano residue. A bunch of gunk from your old life. I was able to clean some of it up, make a few tweaks, hang some art on the walls.

You know how it is.

"What do you mean 'other stuff'?" George said. >>That is a bit of a long story that connects to bigger questions like "Why am I in this pod?", "Who is the jerk that talks in all caps?", and "What happened to the rest of the world?" I can explain some of that backstory, but why don't I bring you up to speed on your New and Improved Brain, then deal with the level-up, then we make some tea and have a heart-to-heart about your totally messed-up situation. George just sighed. >>Right. So.

I'm happy to report that you got six hours of sleep. Precious time to lose, but you've been through a lot, so I figured you could use a break. >>While you were sleeping, I got you what amounts to a few free upgrades. Some of the stuff in the store is true material fabrication—like that blanket, for instance—but some of it is just opening locked doors in your brain's wetware.

"Nothing else in my life makes sense, so I'm letting that comment slide right by." >>There's the attitude! What a trooper. It's probably best if you think of yourself as riding a tour bus through some very interesting scenery for the next few minutes. Just look out the window and take it all in. >>Anyway. That user interface upgrade you bought instead of me—huge mistake by the way—is now yours as well as a few other user interface upgrades. Which I am revealing… now. A few new buttons appeared in his vision.

As he moved his eyes around, information tags popped in and out of view when he focused on things. <Blanket> <Button> <Porthole> <Ink: Dimensional void. > >>Neat, huh? It is an upgrade called Identify. You would have been able to buy it eventually. Your brain was already getting the information, it was just blocked from you. So I unblocked it. I'll mute it for now so the information only pops up when you want it to. >>I'm taking most of the click numbers off your level-up notifications.

In a few days, those numbers are going to get cumbersome and big. If you want to know how many clicks you have, just open the click counter. >>Also, you don't have to say things out loud anymore. If you want to push one of the buttons, give it a hard thought.

"A hard thought?" >>Yeah. Like, a mental poke. Imagine the button is a dart board, and your thought is a dart. Or just figure out your own way to do it. >>Time to level up in 3… 2… 1…. New Achievement: Level Nine +2 Gold +1 Skill Point Would you like to buy anything in the store? Yes or No? George said, "Yes" but nothing happened. >>Oh yeah. I shut off the store voice command feature. Now we can talk all this stuff through without accidentally buying anything.

If you want to buy something, just give it one of those mental pokes. You'll get the hang of it. George did his best to think "yes" with extra clarity, and the store interface opened in his vision. >>There is some metadata attached to these store options, so I'll add a little descriptive commentary if it offers any more clarity on what the options are. Store • Food Pellet—2 gold. A solidified nutritional nano slurry. Tastes awful but it is just what the doctor ordered.

The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there. • Upgrade Cradle: Temperature Control—3 gold. • Upgrade Button: +3 Clicks per minute—4 gold. An inconsequential upgrade that we'll have to get anyway to get better ones later. • Upgrade User Interface: Continuous Store Access—5 gold. Access the store in your interface at any time. • Random Memory—4 gold. • Upgrade Familiar—3 gold. Expand the capabilities of your node spider. • Select Amenity—1 gold.

A random collection of bits and bobs. • Basic Store Upgrade—15 gold. • Pain for Gold >> Here are my thoughts. Don't buy continuous store access yet. At your current click speed, you are leveling up every 30-60 minutes. That will go up as levels become harder to reach, but hopefully we will also upgrade that button enough to increase your click speed.

"How good are the button upgrades going to get? So far, they've been underwhelming," George said. >>Only time will tell. We're going to have to increase your clicks per hour somehow. Around level 20, it is going to take half a day of clicking to get another level. >>You need food, so you're going to have to buy a pellet this time.

"What is the deal with 'nutritional nano slurry'?" >>It is what you eat now. Remember that I said there is other stuff in your body than me? Your body has been substantially changed from what you remember… or, in this case, don't remember. The hip bone is still connected to the leg bone and all that, but there are lots of remnant nano clusters in here doing various… things. Actually, I'm not sure what they're all up to. Good fences make good nano neighbors, so I'm minding my business and they are minding theirs.

Anyway, the upshot is, you eat nutritional slurry now. You will still need some food and water but only rarely. But, hey! No more poop.

"Can we skip ahead to the part where you answer those big-picture questions? How did I get nanobots in my body?" George said. >>Let's finish the store stuff first.

"I want to buy a memory." >>George. Listen. I know these memories are important to you because, you know, they are your memories, but I don't recommend it. Remember what I said about you being at a disadvantage? Part of that relates to the fact that you don't have a great way of getting gold other than clicking the button. That puts a limit on how fast you can grow. And you are going to need a lot of gold, buddy. Let's not waste it on memories for now.

"OK. Sure." >>So I think you should buy a food pellet, upgrade me, and sit on those other three gold.

"Fine. Ready to buy." >Great. Like I said, just think hard thoughts at it. George mentally selected Select Amenity and Random Memory. >>Right. >>So. >>You have a new brain spider in your head giving you expert advice and you go and do whatever you want anyway. Why do I waste my breath?

"I told you," George said.

"I want to buy a memory." >>And the food?

"I can be hungry. It's fine." >>Note: Subject prioritizes personal desires over basic survival needs. >>Hey, George. You know what the bots eat if you don't feed them eventually? They eat you, my friend.

"We'll cross that bridge later," George said.

"Let's get something straight. You are in my head, and I guess that isn't going to change any time soon, but I am in charge here. I appreciate the advice, and thanks for those free upgrades, but you're along for the ride. I'm driving." >>Well. >>That was very clearly put.

"I'm sorry. I do need your help. I just…it's a lot. I mean, the situation is a lot," George said.

"I don't even know what my last name is." Would you like to assign any skills points to Crafting? >>Yeah, yeah. That's fine. Let's put the power struggle for control of your body on hold for a minute and do the skill stuff." The what?" >>Just kidding. But we do need to do the skill stuff first since it is like…our only hope of survival. >>I really do get it. I'm your familiar. You're the boss. You didn't choose this. This is very hard. Blah, blah, blah. I'm just saying…fine. Let's move on.

"Ok." >>Besides, I can just put you to sleep and tinker with your cerebral cortex again later anyway. >>I'm KIDDING. You'll learn that about me. I am very funny.

"That was not funny. It was disturbing." >>What can I say? When your body has been invaded by a robotic spider, the line between funny and disturbing can get pretty thin, am I right? >>Getting serious. Say yes to that prompt, and let's see that skill menu. Then your purchases will arrive. George mentally said "Yes," and the skill menu appeared.

Crafting Menu Level One • Push—2 skill points • Bind—2 skill points • Separate—2 skill points • Reduce—2 skill points • Expand—2 skill points • Spin—2 skill points • Bore—2 skill points • Raise—2 skill points • Lower—2 skill points • Unlock Crafting Menu Level Two—20 gold >>Alright. These are basically self-explanatory. The Crafting path is about taking raw materials and making them into something else. It is the path of artisans who make things to sell or trade. Or just to be useful.

>>Looks like they all got more expensive after you bought draw. Hmm. >>You have already discovered that draw pulls things toward yourself. These skills seem to mostly come in pairs at this level. So there is push, the opposite of draw. Bind and separate. Reduce and expand. You get the picture. >>I think you should choose push. Because your whole growth arc seems to be about pushing a button. >>You and push could be good friends. >>Just my two cents.

Which you can take or, you know, stick where the nano slurry don't shine. That made George laugh.

"That's funny. I hurt your feelings. You choked me out and crawled inside my mouth." >>Ah. Right. So we're even now.

"No, my unwanted brain parasite. Not even." >>Let's remember this moment next time I get you a free upgrade. Or save your life.

"Oh, have you saved my life?" George said. >>Not yet, but I'm sure it'll happen sometime.

"Then we'll revisit the scoreboard after that happens," George said, "How do I get skills other than crafting?" >>Bad news there, buddy. You're stuck with crafting. Well, you can choose another path, but only at certain points in the future and it is really expensive.

"So if there are really so many threats out there like you say, I'm screwed." >>I won't say 'I told you so' because I wasn't around to tell you so, but you should have totally chosen the martial path. Or physical. Or, dude, magical. Or basically anything but crafting. >>Well, not anything but crafting…the sinister path is bad news. Those guys get pretty weird. And astral is useful, but only if you don't mind losing your body. So there…you chose the third-to-worst one.

"How do the skills work?" >>As in, what?" As in, what can I draw? How is this supposed to be useful in crafting? Is there a weight limit? Distance limit? Can I get better at it?" >>Yes, you can get better at it. This is only a level 1 skill. They upgrade with use. And you can purchase upgrades. As to the other questions, we'll have to test the skills to find their limits. >>So…you getting skills or what?

"Yes," George said and mentally selected bind. Skill Selected: Bind >>I guess there is no accounting for taste.

"My brain spider's a smartass. Good to know." >>Nice to meetcha. >>Look out. Here come your purchases. Purchased: Amenity Choose your amenity. • Ball • Chalk • Thread • Jenga block • Sunglasses • Pillow • Tricycle • Door"What do you think? Tricycle or door?" >>You know it's not a door that lets you out, right?

"Tricycle it is." George selected the tricycle. A small red tricycle fell down from the ceiling and bounced on the floor before settling on its side in the middle of the cradle. >>Mazal tov! It's a trike.