Chương 8: Detective Drizella!

I woke up groggily to the harsh glare of the morning sun. Someone kept tugging at my shirt...

"AHH!" I yelped, shooting up into a sitting position. Chickens! They were all over me, pecking and pulling at my dress.

"Shoo! Shoo, you monsters!" I waved my arms and scared them away. I looked around in a daze. I had slept in a hay pile! Like... like a donkey! And now I had hay all over my body. I stood up and frantically tried to brush myself off, to no avail.

"Argh! This straw!" I muttered.

"Get off already!" Dash it all! I smelled like a farm animal now, too!

"Oh, Drizella, is that you?" It was Cinderella. She was holding a bucket of chicken feed. She hurried over and gasped when she saw me.

"Oh dear! What happened to you?"

"I... I..." I stammered, looking down at my ruined state.

"No!" I yelled, covering my face.

"Don't look at me! Don't you dare!"

"Alright, Drizella," Cinderella said softly, immediately looking away.

"I was awake when Stepmother and Anastasia returned without you from the ball. Anastasia said you were in big trouble, but I don't really know anything about it."

"Well, you don't have to stick your big nose in everywhere, do you?" I snapped.

"I was worried, you know. I'm just glad to see you're okay," Cinderella said, in that cursed angelic voice of hers.

"Look, here is what we'll do. I will go to your room to fetch fresh clothes for you. You can wait in the scullery. When I return, I promise I won't look at you, alright?"

"…" I looked at her figure, then looked aside. Why… why was she even helping me?

"Alright," I managed to say. And she was off, just like that. I gathered my skirts and hurried to the scullery. God, I hadn't been in here for ages, maybe only when playing hide and seek as a child. But Cinderella, she practically lived here. Making us porridge, boiling tea, washing mountains of dishes, and what not. I looked at the three small bells on the wall. They were connected to our rooms. Every morning when I pulled the string, Cinderella heard this loud bell so we could order our breakfast.

I was actually starving; now I could ask Cinderella directly for my breakfast, before Mother and Anastasia even woke up. Cinderella soon came down carrying new clothes for me, keeping her gaze firmly on the floor so as not to look at me. Good. I took the clothes and immediately changed. Then I brushed my hair out with my fingers, pulled out a few stubborn pieces of straw, and finally felt somewhat human again.

"You can look now," I informed her. She turned, smiled, and went back to... what was she doing? Pounding herbs for tea, I guessed.

"So, do you want to tell me what this is all about?" Cinderella asked gently. What, are we friends now? Well, she did just bring me clothes.

"We were at the ball, in the palace," I started.

"You know, kings and princes, high-class people. And then, when we met the Prince, he was visibly bored! Yawning and showing utter disrespect! That is definitely not behavior fit for royalty! So, since no one else would, I had to give him a piece of my mind. I put him right in his place!"

"You did what!?" Cinderella gasped, her hands flying to her mouth.

"What, are you deaf? I just said it!"

"Oh, but this is... so unlike you, Drizella," Cinderella said. Then, a genuinely amused smile spread across her face.

"Or perhaps... it's exactly like you? Oh, I wish I could have seen it myself!"

"Are you mocking me?" I asked in annoyance.

"Not at all," she replied warmly, her hands deftly moving as she continued to prepare the morning tea.

"In fact, I find it incredibly brave to talk back to a prince, of all people! However, I can certainly see why Stepmother is angry with you. Insulting royalty in public is exactly the sort of scandal that would ruin her social plans."

"Angry is an understatement!" I scoffed.

"I wouldn't be surprised if she made me a servant like you!"

"Well, I hope she won't," Cinderella chuckled softly.

"For a start, you don't know the first thing about chores or housework. Cleaning, mending clothes... no, it wouldn't do at all."

"Why, you—!" Was she insulting me? Ugh, what a stupid conversation I was having! Getting rejected as a servant co-worker by Cinderella!

"Can I ask you a question?" I asked, deciding to change the subject.

"Of course."

"Let's say, there is a ball," I started, leaning in.

"Another... royal ball. But this time, everyone is invited. Every eligible maiden in the kingdom."

"That would mean I could go too," she deduced cleverly.

"Yes," I said.

"But this is only hepopitical."

"Hypothetical," she corrected.

"Yes, that!" I waved my hand.

"But you would still need a dress to wear, wouldn't you?"

"Yes..." she murmured, suddenly looking thoughtful.

"Well, I do have my mother's old dress. It's lovely, if a bit old-fashioned, I'm afraid. But maybe... I could alter it. You see, I have this book—""Yes, yes," I interrupted impatiently.

"Now, let's say you fix the dress. But right before the ball..." Oh drat, what do I say to make it sound natural?

"Lucifer!" I blurted.

"Let's say the old cat completely loses his mind. He pounces on you, scratching, tearing, and biting! And the lovely dress is completely ruined! Absolutely beyond repair! And the ball is just about to start!"

"Oh, Drizella, why must I answer these silly questions?" she sighed, wiping her hands on her apron.

"I have a lot of work ahead of me!"

"It's, uh... important," I insisted. Then, swallowing my pride, I forced out, "P... please." Cinderella looked entirely taken aback by the magic word. But then she softened into a smile.

"Well," she reasoned, "if that happened, obviously, I couldn't go to the ball, could I? I don't have another dress."

"And what about a carriage?" I pressed.

"Do you know anyone who could... give you a ride? The palace is far away."

"No, I don't know anyone like that!" Cinderella said, a hint of frustration in her voice.

"If you're finished interrogating me, I really must get back to my chores." Just as she said that, two of the three bells on the wall started ringing frantically.

"CINDERELLA!"

"CINDERELLA!" Mother and Anastasia screeched from upstairs.

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" she shouted back. The story has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation. Honestly, why did we even have the bells if we were just going to shout anyway? So Cinderella said she didn't have another dress. It really didn't sound like she was lying… In fact, I don't think she was capable of lying at all! There was definitely more to this mystery.

"What if you were in love with a prince?" I shouted at Cinderella over the noise, while she frantically wrestled with the porridge pots.

"And he loved you, and you danced! What on earth would make you run away from him?"

"Oh, leave me be, Drizella!" Cinderella dismissed me, turning her back to focus on the cooking while the bells kept ringing. Good heavens, what an annoying sound they made!

"CINDERELLA!" more shouting.

"Coming!" she yelled back. The mysteries were piling up, and I couldn't let it go. The more I thought about it, the less sense anything made. For example, she said her mother's old dress needed fixing. On the day of the ball, we gave her endless chores and impossible tasks. We saw her constantly working; she couldn't possibly have had the time to sew a dress! And something else! We threw those beads and that sash onto the floor in our room. Cinderella hadn't even been in there to collect them...

"Wait!" I called out to Cinderella yet again, just as she was halfway to the door, balancing two heavy breakfast trays.

"I made breakfast for you too, it's right there," she said, nodding toward a third tray resting on the table.

"You are getting help somehow!" I deduced, pointing an accusatory finger at her.

"Well... that's true," she admitted softly.

"It's my little secret. But wait here, will you? I need to get these trays up to your loud family." I nodded eagerly. Finally! Cinderella had a secret! She had just admitted it! Someone was helping her! And maybe... maybe she would tell me who! Was it a secret lover? It had to be! Maybe some low-ranking servant from another estate. What... what if he was cute? A strong, willing stable lad with a great jawline? I couldn't wait for her to come back down. But my stomach rumbled. She had left me food.

Heavens, I was starving. I went straight for the tray and started shoveling the porridge into my mouth. It was actually quite good! Cinderella returned while I was only halfway through my bowl, digging in greedily.

"Wu yuh tell me now?" I mumbled, my cheeks bulging.

"Yer secret?"

"Well," she hesitated, "won't you finish your porridge first?" I shook my head vigorously in refusal.

"Oh, alright then," she sighed, pulling up a stool and sitting down beside me.

"Well, it's not really that big of a secret. It's just… I would still prefer you didn't mention it to Stepmother." I nodded solemnly, immediately stuffing another spoonful of porridge into my mouth.

"It can be quite lonely here, you know," she began. I nodded in understanding.

"So... I... well, promise not to laugh!" I nodded vigorously again, lips sealed tight around my breakfast.

"The birds and the mice are my friends," she said simply. I burst out laughing, completely losing control and shooting porridge everywhere across the table.

"Ew! Drizella, disgusting!" she scolded, grabbing a towel to wipe up the mess.

"And also mean!" But I couldn't help it. I continued laughing, nearly choking on my food. Dash it all, I just couldn't stop myself. She was friends with the mice! That was just too much!

"I'm glad you're having fun," she huffed, sounding genuinely offended.

"You should know, they are incredibly nice and sweet! They're the best friends I could ask for!"

"I... I..." I wheezed, laughing and coughing at the same time.

"I'm sure they are!" I tried to rein myself in. I really did.

"Well, would you like to meet them?" she asked. I stopped laughing instantly.

"You mean..."

"The mice," she explained matter-of-factly.

"They were here a moment ago when I fed the animals. They like the corn. They should still be around here somewhere..."

"A mouse? You mean... in here?" I looked around in sudden horror, pulling my feet up.

"The mouse you put in Mother's teacup yesterday?!"

"It wasn't me!" she defended herself.

"That was just Gus! The poor thing was probably trying to hide in the cup while Lucifer was chasing him. He didn't mean any harm!"

"Oh..." Gus, she called him. They had names now, did they? I had thought it was just a funny joke, but it turned out our poor servant was as mad as a March Hare!

"The boys have already left," she noted, looking around the baseboards.

"Oh, but here are some of the girls!"

"The girls..." I repeated blankly.

"Suzy!" Cinderella called out, looking toward the corner of the room.

"Suzy, over here! Come and say hello."

"Are you mocking me?" I demanded. I suddenly felt like this was an elaborate prank at my expense.

"How dare you try to—""AAAAAH!" I shrieked. A huge rat had leaped onto the chair, scurried right past Cinderella's leg, and landed square on the table!

"A rat!" I screamed, pressing myself back against the wall.

"Get it away from me!"

"Why, that is very rude of you, Drizella!" said Cinderella.

"I asked you first if you wanted to meet them." Then she turned to the rat.

"I'm sorry, Suzy," she said to… to the rat.

"I should have known this would happen." But the rat... well, maybe it was a mouse... had something on it. I forced myself to calm down slightly. It didn't seem to be attacking. I gave it a more thorough look. It... it was wearing clothes! The little mouse was dressed in a simple yellow dress, a red headscarf, and... was that an apron? And just as I had managed to calm myself, thinking that things had gotten as thoroughly bizarre as they possibly could... the mouse really, actually, truly spoke.

"I already know her!" squeaked the mouse in a high-pitched voice. She crossed her tiny arms in anger.

"And I'm not surprised, not one bit!"

"Cinderella!" I stammered, trembling as I clutched the edge of my stool.

"The mouse... the mouse... it just..."

"Talks?" the mouse squeaked back at me, putting her little paws on her hips.

"Yes, I talk! You can talk too, can't you? Calling me a rat and all."

"I'm... sorry?" I managed to say, feeling faint. Mice... they shouldn't talk, right? This was not normal. Not normal at all!

"And since we are talking and all," the mouse continued hotly, "I can tell you that I don't like you! Not at all!" She pointed a tiny, accusatory finger at me.

"How you treat Cinderelly! You are awful people! Always bossing her around and telling her what to do!"

"Now, Suzy," Cinderella intervened in a soothing voice.

"That may be true, but this is the first time Drizella has ever seen one of you. I just... I thought I'd introduce you..."

"Sorry, Cinderelly," the mouse huffed, turning her nose up.

"I don't like her. I don't want to talk to her!" And with that, she hopped onto the chair, jumped to the floor, and scurried across the room, vanishing into a small hole in the baseboard.

"I'm so sorry it went like that," Cinderella said apologetically.

"Maybe one of the boy mice would be—""That... that's quite alright!" I said, holding up a shaking hand to stop her.

"One talking mouse wearing a dress and insulting me is... is quite enough for the moment."

"Did you like the dress, though?" Cinderella asked cheerfully.

"I made them myself, for all my mice friends!"

"It was… lovely," I said weakly.

"So the mice.. ugh, your small friends, they.. help you?"

"If they can," she nodded.

"They are very capable—well, when they work together. The birds, too!"

"Birds... the birds, too?" I asked, feeling a headache coming on.

"Like... the chickens?"

"Oh, no!" Cinderella laughed, as if the very idea was ridiculous.

"The small songbirds! They are such sweet things!"

"So..." I rubbed my temples, trying to wrap my mind around this absolute wackiness.

"Only the mice and the birds speak?"

"No, Drizella!" she laughed again, eyes sparkling.

"Heavens no, birds don't speak at all! They only chirp, of course." They only chirp. Of course. Because they are birds, after all. This was too much. It was entirely too much for me to handle. I desperately needed to lie down in my bed. I stood up stiffly and turned to Cinderella.

"Well. I will be going," I announced.

"Uh... tha... th... ah, bye!" By Jove, I had almost thanked a servant! What on earth was wrong with me today?! I made my way back into the main house, and to my horror, I saw Mother waiting in the main hall.

"Drizella!" she barked the moment she spotted me.

"Yes, Mother?" I squeaked.

"Go to your room immediately," she ordered, her eyes flashing.

"You are not to leave that room until I say so!"

"Yes, Mother." I can pee out the window if I absolutely must, I suppose, I thought grimly. Tonight, at late evening or night—I don't remember exactly when—the days should return to the day before yesterday. Unless it was a one-time thing, in which case I'm in trouble for the rest of my life for the stunt I pulled with the prince! Oh God, I hope it does repeat… And if it does repeat, I could... wait, what was I trying to do again? Oh, right. Solve the mysteries happening around me. I was a lady detective now.

I liked mysteries that needed solving, just like in volume five of The Scandalous Adventures of Fifi LaRousse. In that story, Fifi travels to snowy Russia to solve the mystery of the famous dancing bears' disappearance. Fifi seduces Alexei, a towering, fur-clad brute of a man with ice-blue eyes, and they track the bears to a secret underground vodka cellar. After solving the case, she leaves Alexei frozen in the snow to loot the Tsar's private treasury.

This was a good story, but aside from giving me a few ideas on how to seduce a Russian brute, it was of little help in solving the mysteries ahead of me. So, what did I actually know? I thought as I climbed the stairs. Well, Cinderella genuinely had no idea how she could possibly get a carriage ride to the palace, nor how to obtain the gorgeous dress. How she had obtained them for the first ball remained a massive mystery—as was the reason she had fled from the Prince the moment the clock struck midnight.

As to why the prince fell for her... no, if I'm being honest with myself, that wasn't a mystery at all. It made perfect sense. But talking mice! Mice that helped her with chores! Ew... I sincerely hoped she wasn't using them to mend my clothes! If she was, I was going to kill her. Still, talking mice was another mystery. And why does the day go back in time without anyone remembering except me? Also a mystery. Oh… I think that one is somehow related to Lucifer… yes, I remembered now.

He did something to me, right before it all began. And… when thinking about it, he shouldn't have healed so fast from that horrible fall from the tower… this cat is definitely cursed! I need to investigate him, too. Indeed, a lot of mysteries. But not to worry! Detective Drizella would solve them all in a breeze! I yawned. I suddenly realized just how tired I was. Between sleeping in a hay pile and being scolded by a tiny lady mouse, I definitely needed a good rest.

I'm going to nap; the day was boring anyway, and I've been confined to my room. I want night to arrive already. Then… I will finally know.