Chương 41: Chapter 38: The Rhythm of the Pavement (Part 4)

The afternoon sun beat down on the bustling commercial brick avenues of downtown Vale, casting long shadows across the crowded sidewalks. It should have been a normal Tuesday, but walking down the street had become a logistical nightmare.

"Look! It's him! The Hero of Vale!"

"Oh my gosh, is that the guy who shattered the lower district street by tripping over a rock?"

"Hey! Hero! Can I get an autograph on my grocery bag?!" Saitama trudged lazily along the cobblestones, his shoulders slouched so low his green janitorial suit looked entirely deflated. In one hand, he clutched a plastic bag containing three discount sponges, a bottle of cheap window cleaner, and a single economy pack of seaweed snacks. His dotted eyes were fixed straight ahead, carrying a look of profound, localized misery as dozens of civilians stared, pointed, and whispered from a respectful distance.

"This sucks," Saitama grumbled flatly, a heavy whine creeping into his voice as he adjusted his grip on the cleaning supplies.

"I somehow really miss my home world. Back there, no matter how many giant monsters or city-destroying aliens I punched, nobody knew who I was. I could buy my discount cabbage in peace without people treating me like a zoo animal." Walking alongside him, acting as a mandatory security escort under the strict, frantic orders of Headmistress Glynda Goodwitch, were Ruby Rose and Weiss Schnee. Ruby let out an awkward, nervous laugh, scratching the back of her neck as she adjusted the strap of Crescent Rose on her back.

"Hehe... well, you did save the city from a massive Grimm breach, Saitama. People are just really grateful! Though, yeah, the crowd sizes are getting a little out of hand."

"Out of hand is an understatement," Weiss commented sharply, crossing her arms as she matched their pace, her white combat skirt swaying lightly. Her piercing blue eyes scanned the gathering onlookers with academic exasperation.

"Your 'celebrity' status is escalating day by day, and the administrative impact on Beacon Academy is becoming severe. We've had to triple the security protocols at the front gates just to keep rogue reporters and amateur bloggers from sneaking into the courtyard to photograph you sweeping the floors." Weiss sighed, casting a sideways glance at the bald hero.

"If it makes you feel any better, it almost got worse. I received word from the corporate offices that the Schnee Dust Company marketing team actually intended to use your image for a massive global advertisement campaign. It was supposed to be a token of public gratitude after you...

'accidentally' neutralized those mercenaries who were hijacking our high-value Dust transport."

"Oh, an ad campaign?" Saitama blinked his small eyes, his interest briefly parsing the concept.

"Did it come with free groceries?"

"Fortunately for your privacy, no," Weiss said, her expression turning incredibly dry, her lips thinning into a tight line.

"My father, Jacques, immediately vetoed the entire proposal the moment it reached his desk. He still harbors an absolute, roaring hatred for you ever since you completely humiliated him. He refused to let the SDC logo be attached to a, quote, 'bald, uncultured vagrant in a janitorial uniform.'""Your dad?" Saitama looked at Weiss.

"When did I meet him?"

"You forgot again?!" Weiss' eyes widen at him, then shook her head in disbelief.

"For gods' sake, I already told you not long ago! You stood beside me when he tried to force me to go back with him! After the Battle of Beacon! You shattered his cane with a breath!" Saitama glanced to the sky for a moment, until he remembered.

"Oh, that annoying crazy mustache guy in fancy clothes? Well, he does sound like a real buzzkill." As they neared the corner of a high-end commercial plaza, the sound of a small bell chimed as two figures stepped out of a specialized gadget and weapon-upkeep boutique.

"Ah, Miss Rose, Miss Schnee!" Professor Harold Mulberry, a meticulously dressed man with sharp eyes and an apron stained with specialized machine oil, stepped forward. Beside him stood Professor Ann Greene, the academy's instructor for Stealth and Security, her posture perfectly rigid and her eyes analytical as she carried a heavy, reinforced steel briefcase. Both were prominent members of the Beacon faculty, rarely seen outside their respective laboratory wings.

"Professor Mulberry! Professor Greene!" Ruby gasped, her eyes instantly turning into giant, sparkling silver circles as she locked onto the mechanical parts poking out of Mulberry's leather toolbag.

"Are those specialized automated gear-servos?! Are you guys working on a new weapon? Can I see it? What's the fire rate?!" Professor Mulberry chuckled warmly, adjusting his spectacles.

"Calm down, Miss Rose. We just picked up some unrefined kinetic sensors. Professor Greene and I are currently collaborating on a joint institutional project. We are designing an advanced, fully automated security network with localized defensive armaments for the academy's outer perimeter. Given recent... global anomalies, the Headmistress requested a more proactive defense." This story has been taken without authorization. Report any sightings.

Professor Greene nodded coldly, her sharp gaze shifting from Weiss over to Saitama. She analyzed his relaxed, non-combat stance with deep intrigue.

"A necessary precaution. Security is only as strong as its quietest variable." Before Ruby could launch into a twenty-minute technical interrogation about weapon crafting, a sudden, violent screech of tearing rubber and crashing metal echoed from three blocks away. SCREECH! RAT-TAT-TAT-TAT-TAT! The peaceful afternoon air was instantly shattered by the deafening roar of high-caliber machine-gun fire.

A fleet of black, armored terrorist vans tore around the far corner, swerving violently across the lanes as they actively engaged in a high-speed pursuit with the Vale Police Department. The criminals were leaning out of the side windows, firing heavy automatic rifles at the pursuing police cruisers, sending stray dust rounds ricocheting off the brick buildings.

"It's a terrorist raid!" Weiss yelled, her hand instantly flying to the hilt of Myrtenaster as she stepped into a disciplined combat stance.

"Huntsmen and Huntresses duties! Let's go!" Ruby cheered, her silver eyes flashing as she reached back to deploy Crescent Rose. Professors Mulberry and Greene instantly dropped their cases, their Auras flaring as they prepared to intercept the oncoming vehicular threat. Saitama's face instantly dropped into an expression of profound, exhausted annoyance.

"Ugh, great. More trouble. Look, you guys handle the car stuff. I'm backing away so I don't get yelled at by your scary Headmistress again." Saitama turned on his heel, actively stepping backward toward the safety of a high-end beauty salon and wig boutique to avoid the incoming crossfire. Unfortunately for Saitama, the universe possessed a volatile sense of humor. As the lead terrorist van swerved to avoid a police spike strip, the driver completely lost control of the heavy vehicle.

The armored van skidded sideways across the cobblestones, its massive tires blowing out with explosive force as it barreled directly toward the sidewalk. Specifically, right toward the exact spot where Saitama had just stepped back.

"Saitama, watch out!" Ruby screamed, lunging forward to pull him away. Saitama didn't even turn around. Hearing the deafening screech behind him, he simply raised his left leg in a lazy, absent-minded backward stretch, intending to just step over a high curb without looking. BOOM. His bright red boot didn't hit a curb. It met the front reinforced steel bumper of the charging, multi-ton armored van at absolute peak kinetic velocity.

The moment the vehicle made contact with the back of Saitama's heel, the entire forward momentum of the van ceased instantly, completely violating the laws of physics. The front engine block crumpled like wet tissue paper, the chassis buckling inward as the sheer, unyielding resistance of his foot caused the back end of the van to violently flip into the air.

The vehicle spun upside down, crashing perfectly into the trailing terrorist cars behind it, creating a neat, compressed pile of mangled metal that trapped all the criminals inside instantly. However, the localized shockwave of the stop blew outward. The rear corner of the overturned van clipped the display window of the adjacent beauty salon. CRASH!

The glass shattered beautifully, and from the top shelf of the display, a premium, styled mannequin head holding a short, styled, jet-black male wig was launched into the air. The wig detached from the plastic head, fluttering through the smoke and dust in a perfect, comical arc. Saitama stood perfectly still, his back still turned to the wreckage, his hands holding his discount sponges. Flop. The short, black male wig landed squarely, perfectly, and seamlessly right on top of Saitama's smooth, bald head.

Silence descended upon the avenue. The smoke slowly cleared, revealing the completely neutralized terrorist cell trapped in a neat pile of scrap metal. The police cruisers came to a halt, officers stepping out with their jaws slack.

"H-He did it again..." a civilian whispered in profound awe.

"Amazing! The Hero of Vale stopped the chase without even looking!" The crowd instantly erupted into wild cheers and roaring applause, moving closer to praise the accidental savior. But as the dust completely settled and the sunlight hit Saitama's face, the cheering suddenly faltered, turning into a collective, stunned gasp. Saitama slowly turned around, his face maintaining its usual flat, oval-eyed expression. But the addition of the short, textured black hair framed his face perfectly.

The wig completely altered his proportions, erasing the comical, egg-like roundness of his head and instantly highlighting his sharp jawline, his symmetrical features, and a rugged, classic handsome aesthetic that had been hidden beneath his baldness for years. It was a stark, visual echo of the young hero he had been before his training had stripped away his hair. Flashbulbs instantly began going off as citizens frantically whipped out their scrolls to take pictures.

"Wait... is he actually... super handsome?" a girl in the crowd squeaked, her face turning bright red.

"Oh wow, he looks like a high-end Atlesian model!" Right next to him, Ruby, Weiss, and even the normally stoic Professor Greene stood completely frozen. Ruby's silver eyes were wide, a violent, bright crimson blush rapidly spreading across her cheeks as she stared at the sudden transformation. Weiss completely forgot her rigid posture, her mouth slightly open as a deep pink color flooded her face, her eyes darting from the styled black hair down to his face.

Even Professor Greene adjusted her glasses, her cheeks flaring with a rare, visible tint of color as she cleared her throat uncomfortably.

"Well, well. Would you look at that," Professor Mulberry rubbed his chin, impressed by Saitama's current look. Saitama blinked, completely oblivious to the sudden romantic tension in the air. He reached up, his fingers brushing against the synthetic, styled fibers of the black wig. His face comically twisted into an exaggerated, jagged caricature of pure, soul-crushing rage and existential despair.

"Are you kidding me?!" Saitama shrieked comically, his sharp, white teeth showing as he shook his fists at the sky, tears of frustration streaming down his face.

"Why does this keep happening?! Bad luck in my old universe, bad luck in this universe! I just wanted to buy some cheap sponges, and now I'm wearing a dead guy's hair on the news again! That Glynda lady is gonna kill meeee!" As the scrolls continued to click away, capturing the incredibly handsome, violently screaming hero, Ruby and Weiss could only watch in blushing, absolute comedic defeat.