Chương 103: Abe Loses It

I was face down in the dirt at Marcus's feet. He was kneeling with his head bowed, which meant he had a front row seat. Nobody moved, but someone at the back of the group made a sound that was quickly swallowed. Growling, I stood and brushed the dirt off my face before turning around. Tala was grooming her tail, acting like nothing had happened. I'd accepted the occasional cucumber thrown at me and even put up with the comments she sometimes made. However, when she took it public, she crossed the line. Tala.

She looked up from her grooming. Abe… I shifted. My body stretched and coiled as I shapeshifted into a pine marten. Then I launched off myself at her before she could finish that thought. Tala bolted and I went after her. The humans watched their god turn into a streak of brown fury and shoot across the yard after his wife, which I was aware was not the first impression most religions aimed for. Martens were built for this.

I closed the distance fast, and when she jumped at the base of the nearest tree, I caught her mid-leap. Got you, I thought as we tumbled off the bark and across the ground. I pinned her by the shoulders with my claws braced and my teeth an inch from her ear. Her eyes were huge. Abe, she squeaked telepathically. Abe, darling, sweetheart, my favorite raccoon. You embarrassed me, I sent. I pressed her a little harder into the branch. I wasn't hurting her. I just made it clear she wasn't going anywhere.

You don't get to do that again. She shivered, her tail going abruptly still. Okay. Say it. I won't embarrass you in front of others again. Good, and just to make sure you remember, I started spanking her furry bottom. It wasn't hard enough to hurt, but she needed to experience the humiliation she'd caused me on several occasions. After half a minute of, "Don't ever do something like that again. Do you understand me?" with every word punctuated by smack on the bottom, I finally let her up.

She immediately scrambled up a tree and gave me the finger before disappearing. Fuck me, maybe I shouldn't have done that. Ah, screw it. She deserved it. I shifted back into my raccoon form and turned around. Everyone stared at me with mouths wide open. That was when I saw Kess take off and fly toward the church. Damn it. You can only push a man so far. If you spot this story on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation. Still, I was already regretting my lapse of self-control.

This was further exacerbated by what Pierre muttered next, "This is going to become a scripture, isn't it?" I sighed. I already knew it was absolutely going to become a scripture. Although I was tempted to chase after Tala, I crushed that thought. It took a lot of willpower, but I managed to succeed. This was mostly done by telling myself I could deal with her later and I needed to stick to business. That being said, I really should have taken it up with her privately.

I wondered, Am I going to have to apologize again? Shaking my head, I banished such thoughts and turned back to the group of worshippers. They'd been so surprised by what happened that they hadn't moved from where they were kneeling.

"You can get up," I said as I shifted back into my raccoon form. They stood up and Marcus cleared his throat before saying, "Thank you for seeing us, Great Trash Panda." I was going to find whoever taught him that and we were going to have a conversation just like I had with Tala.

"Who told you about that?"

"The Moon-Eyed People," Marcus said.

"When they told us about the Church of Resurrection."

"Right." I'd expected it, but unfortunately there wasn't much I could do about it.

"Let's talk." Marcus said, "We want to go through. The soldiers won't let us, but we thought you might be able to help."

"I can get you through," I said.

"But your people need to follow rules. Pierre is going to explain them. If anyone has a problem with any of them, they stay behind."

"We'll follow them."

"Good." I looked at the group behind him.

"One more thing. Whatever the Moon-Eyed People told you about me, I'm still mostly a person figuring this out. I make mistakes. I have bad days. I just got thrown off my own porch by my wife." I'd actually thought the faith strands connecting me to my followers would weaken after what happened and what I said. Despite this, I could feel them strengthen instead. I then nodded to Pierre, "Walk them through the rules."

While he was doing that, I headed back inside and called Claire to let her know I was intending to let the group go through the gate. There wasn't much use in me listing the rules myself, or sticking around to hear them. They were fairly basic, mostly common sense stuff. For example, don't attack anything that isn't attacking you. Feel free to defend yourself. Don't steal or break things. Basically, I didn't want to escalate the situation.

I did, however, want to give my human followers the chance to explore the other side. They might even be back to bring back some exotic plants or locate other valuable resources. Then they could come back and tell me all about it. Speaking of communication, I had some phone calls to make. Usually, Tala was our communications person. Almost everything went through her. It felt weird contacting the others on my own. After that, I went outside and listened as Pierre finished explaining the rules with Marcus's group.

I looked at Marcus and asked, "You understand what happens if someone breaks the rules on the other side?"

"They don't come back until you decide otherwise," Marcus said.

"And they forfeit whatever they collected."

"And if they cause a problem with the ratkin?"

"Same thing, plus you reserve the right to let the ratkin deal with it." He said it evenly, which meant Pierre had been thorough.

"Good. I don't want to start an interplanar war," I said.

"We'll meet you at the gate tomorrow morning at sunrise." Marcus and the rest of the followers smiled and nodded. A few of them gave me awkward bows before they started walking the long way back to their vehicles. As for me, I looked at Pierre. Pierre wouldn't meet my gaze and started whistling It's a Small World before realizing what he was doing. After that, he cleared his throat, pointed to his truck, and said, "Uh, I'll be right back. Shelly wants to talk to me."

Watching him scurry away should have made me feel better, but it actually made me feel worse. Crap, I lost my temper again. I hadn't been this mad since Tala redecorated the cabin. Even when the cabin was being remodeled I hadn't lost my temper. Part of me wanted to ask if I was the problem. Nah, she had it coming, I finally told myself. Still, that didn't mean anything. I was going to have to find her and apologize. Sighing, I shifted into a bloodhound and took a big sniff.

After catching her scent, I started following her trail into the forest. This is going to be so much fun.