Chương 566: Day Five Hundred And Sixty-Four

Dear Diary, I've mentioned it once or twice before, but I cannot overemphasize the importance of competent subordinates. Competent friends. Competent teammates? I mean, it sounds a little weird to say 'competent partners', although it sounds less weird when I say it out loud, because out loud it might mean business partners, or tennis partners, or bridge partners. Not that I play bridge. Or tennis, for that matter. But my brain was absolutely thinking sex partners, and anyone who knows me knows it.

Inside my head it sounded like 'oh, you've got to have competent sex partners, how else are you gonna get that sweet, sweet dopamine when they mess with your lady bits'. Which, even though I was thinking sex and slash or romantic partners, I wasn't thinking about them being competent at sex. Even though, and I cannot say this often enough, holy shit they absolutely are. No, I meant that having... wait, life partners! That's really closer to what I meant than sex partners.

Having life partners who are competent means that you can each rely on the others to do things in their areas of competency. Need a meal cooked? Marie. Need an injury healed? Siobhan. Need an army, monster, God, or other dangerous whatever dead? Me. Need to build a government for a multicultural society, with the capacity and intent to uplift that society to something resembling modern civilization? Saffron.

We've each got things we do, whether they're important, like Marie's jobs, or just convenient, like the rest of us. Seriously. Wounds heal, or maybe you die. Monsters might get bored and fuck off, or one of the vast number of monster killers here and now will happen along, and they might not be a bigger or less pleasant monster than the one that had been threatening you. Modern civilization isn't always what I think it's cracked up to be.

But you gotta eat, and every meal being a fuckin' gourmet banquet makes everything else that much better. Or less bad, if that's the way things are. Not to mention Marie's not half bad at the monster killing her own self. Honestly, though, I wasn't thinking about my lovely ladies. About halfway through my Wife mandated, Concubine enforced day of rest, Marie showed up.

"S'up, Marie? You wanna join in?" She shook her head and held out her hand.

"Lancaster."

"Oh, shit. Siobhan? Si..." I lost a bit of time, then grabbed her by the hair and lifted. Seemed totally wrong to lift rather than holding her there to me too, except for the absolutely smug grin on her face when she looked up at me and said, "apologies, my Goddess, but I was almost finished." I snorted out a laugh.

"Yeah.

'You'. I gotta talk to Larry." She shook her head.

"You're supposed to be resting."

"No, seriously, I left him hanging yesterday. I get that I'm too tired to do what I intended to then, but... are you teaching Basic Two tomorrow?" At her pouty nod, I said, "well then, I'll be cutting class, so I can do it then."

"You don't want me as a teacher?" I bopped some casual clothes on both of us, enjoying how Siobhan looked in jeans and a tee shirt, then slipped an arm around her and took Marie's hand.

"You know my line on that. I'd rather have you than have you 'teaching' me something I already know." I looked at Marie.

"Please?" She stepped us to the Dining Hall at the Academy.

"Commander!" I stepped up and gave Larry a quick hug when he stood to greet me.

"Hey, Larry. Sorry I flaked on you yesterday. Was testing some new Naval stuff with Saffron on Monday, and it left me a little more strung out than I realized." I looked around and saw a few of my Cadets eating within easy hearing distance. I leaned into the hug and quietly asked, "Do you have any space we could spar in at Lancaster House? Or do you want to come see the Homestead?" He chuckled as he pulled away.

"Since that Homestead is, technically at least, on Lancaster lands, it behooves me to come and make sure it's adequately defended and supplied." He laughed a little at the look I gave him.

"Oh, please, Commander. You and I both know both are true, but there are forms to be followed." He turned to Bonnie.

"Did you want to bring Lucas along?" She looked up, tilted her head a second, then said, "All my work at Lancaster House is presently caught up. So long as the Commander doesn't mind if Euryale and Stheno visit as well?" I smiled.

"Hey, we've even got all kinds of space if you guys decide to spend the night." I stopped for a second, thinking about that, then said, "come to think about it, you could spend the night tonight and tomorrow night. Give you a chance to try the Bath, and another night to enjoy it after what I've got planned for the day."

"We do have plumbing at Lancaster House, Commander." Bonnie snarked.

"Oh, I know. I absolutely know that. And you absolutely do not understand. But you will. Much to the chagrin of your budget after you decide to copy what we've made." She smiled up.

"Okay, this I must see. The five of us would love to come see your Homestead, Commander." With that decided we said our farewells and Marie carried Siobhan and I back to the Bedroom. Marie sat down on the divan and pulled out her knitting, totally smiling at Ice Pop and me without looking at us. Siobhan took the opportunity of me accidentally on purpose not remembering bras under our tee shirts to play around with how cloth deformed when nips nipped, which got me looking at the outfit I'd put her in.

Jeans and white tee shirt, complete with a rip right above the cleavage where I'd put it so long ago. I grabbed her by the wrists and said, "Big ask, I know, but can you not move even the slightest bit for a minute? I've got to chat with Karen." She sighed, but smiled up at me.

"Of course, Mistress. May I observe?" I couldn't figure out why she wanted to eavesdrop on my conversation with Karen, hell I couldn't think of exactly how to hide it from her without deliberately bumping her out, so I said, "sure." Then might have blushed a little when her gaze dropped straight down to where I was making twin tents of my shirt. Karen? Yes, my Goddess? First, I'm sorry for standing you up on Tuesday. She laughed. Quite all right.

I showed, and you were there, but you didn't even notice me, even when I called out to you. Oh, shit. I really do need this break day. Anyhow, meet me at the Homestead tomorrow first thing? Before she replied, I had a thought. Unless you'd rather come up and spend the night? I felt her waffling and thought, Marie could make waffles... She sighed and I felt her blush. I'd intended to, ah, entertain some guests tonight. As a personal thing, not a Temple thing.

I'm not sure if she meant for me to hear her next thought, but it came through as a mutter anyhow, although the lines between those two blur at times like this. I laughed. Bring 'em along. Just lemme know how many and how much more food we should make. Ah... myself and two others, and... She shot me an image of two of the three of Thomas, Richard, and Harold. I could never tell the difference, honestly. Like, yeah, three totally different guys, clearly, but I had no idea which one was which.

Given that they seemed to share one brain cell between the three of them, I'm pretty sure they hadn't noticed, either. Plenty of extra food, please. I couldn't help but tease her a little. You sure you don't want us to go light on dinner, and just make a big breakfast. Make sure they're not too food sleepy for your entertainment plans? Champion! She sounded really scandalized for a second, then snorted out a laugh, I think at herself. That's a wonderful idea. My Goddess is Wise.

Hey, I got a spot in the Temple of Wisdom along with owning the Temple of Love. My High Priestesses do right by me. She shuddered a little, then thought, I'll see you at dinner? See you then! I turned back to my little Ice Pop, who may or may not have been engaging in enhancing the reaction she was watching, and said, "Siobhan?" She looked up at me.

"Darling?" She shuddered just a tiny bit, her eyes never leaving mine.

"I'mma apologize in advance, because this is both maybe rude and probably way more energetic than you want me to be, but I've spent the last ten minutes or so being a responsible adult, and I've been wanting to do this since, since, well before our date."

"Wha..." I cut her off by spinning her back to the Bed, then grabbed her shirt at the collar and ripped it into a vest. Then I grabbed her jeans, lifted her, and did the same to them before tossing her back onto the bed, then pouncing on her. Good times. Lay there afterward, with her playing with my hair as I half snoozed with my head on her chest.

"Tabitha?"

"Yes, Siobhan?"

"I've been waiting for you to do that since our date too." Napped through most of the afternoon. Guess I just needed the right amount of exercise or something. Marie woke me with her claw tips on my calf.

"Guests." I yawned, stretched, kissed Siobhan, then rolled forward off the bed, pulling her along, until I stood in front of Marie, who also got a kiss.

"Okay then. Guess we ought to put something like dressy clothes on?" Marie, who had her Maid uniform on, shrugged. I dickered a bit, then dropped Cadet uniforms onto myself and Siobhan. Who immediately squealed and said, "Tabitha! This is most inappropriate!"

"Yeah. I know. You look cute in it. We're revisiting this later." Then I switched us both to our High Clergy outfits; The Dress for me, Glowing Midnight for her. A moment of delightful consternation by my Ice Pop later, I added Glowing Midnight's dress, then held out an arm. Siobhan, who still wasn't exactly perfectly stable in heels, lay a hand on my arm and said, "careful, Hero. Keep doing things like that and I'll get all kinds of thoughts above my station."

"I certainly hope so, Archmage Darling." With her blushing bright red, I let Marie step the three of us to the Courtyard, where Saffron stood greeting Karen, the Lancasters, their Maids, and Karen's hirsute Dragonslayers. I realized immediately that Saffron had popped a Filtration Ward around their arrival spot to keep the worst of the cold out.

"Hey guys! Welcome to the Homestead!" I glanced at Marie.

"Do we have time for a quick tour before dinner?" She nodded, and Saffron took charge.

"If you don't mind abbreviating the external portion of the tour," at Larry's nod, she started in with the tour guide voice.

"To the north and south, set into the walls of this branch canyon, are our 'bunkhouses', apartments for all save family and guests. To the west is the West Tower, which serves both as lookout and is a functional shot tower." Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions. At that point Larry, who'd craned his head back to see the top of the tower, interjected, "I'm sure you can see quite a ways from the top of that... tower." Saffron just smiled at him.

"We can indeed." Tension melted as Larry laughed.

"Serves me right for trying to outsmart an Archmage. Still, so long as you can keep eyes on it, you can protect it, which is all that really matters, right?"

"Just so. To the east, is the East House, residence for our family, as well as, at present, a Dining Room that can seat our current population. There are kitchens and dining rooms in the other houses as well, not to mention plumbing and hearths suitable for cooking in the apartments."

At Larry's inquisitive look, she explained, "while I fully expect most of those living on our Homestead will adjust to the kind of communal living and support we'd like to foster, it's come to my attention that it's important for families, even individuals, to have private space that is theirs and theirs alone." When he glanced at Siobhan and I, she smiled and said, "oh, I think the four of us are a bit closer than that, but we've also enough space that should one of us require privacy, they can have it as well."

"It's lovely, but it's also cold, and I can't see it getting warmer with the sun going down," said Bonnie, holding a bundle bigger than her torso which I assumed contained little Lucas.

"Shall we get our asses inside before they freeze?"

"One last thing?" At Bonnie's nod, Saffron pointed far above the East House.

"See the little building up there?" When the others nodded, she said, "that would be Tabitha's little hideaway she built, at the top of the East House's back stairs, which the children seem to have named the Bore." When everybody giggled a little at that, she said, "and with that, let's get inside before Tabitha gets so stiff she lifts her Garb clean off her skin." Everybody except Larry and I laughed their asses off at that. After a few seconds, I gave in and laughed too. There wasn't any kind of harm in it.

I'd started to realize that the Persian women, the Maenads, and most of the Camden Yards Bag had the kind of humor you'd call 'earthy'. Downright bawdy at times, although in this case they weren't implying anything sexual. Just that while I didn't care about or even notice the cold, my body definitely still reacted to it. Totally to the cold, and not where Siobhan's hands had wandered while nobody could see. Okay, maybe both. Marie did some really awesome steaks, which turned out to be bear steak.

Marinated and grilled or something, but just... wow. Once everybody had a solid dinner in them, Marie led everybody on a tour of her Kitchen, which Euryale and Stheno seemed less interested in than I might have guessed, then up the Bore to the back hallway of the guest rooms.

"Use as many of these as you like, we've no other guests at the moment." I thought it was kinda neat how she'd totally offered the Maids and the Dragonslayers their own rooms if they wanted.

"Or, if you like, you're welcome to join us in our room. We built our bed with an eye for the future, when at some point we'd like to expand our little family." I almost choked when she said 'little family', because... shit, there were eleven of us. Not exactly what I'd call little. It took my brain a second to realize she'd just invited Bonnie and Larry into our bed, although thankfully the one we used to sleep in, not the Bed, because... Shit, I realized right then that I really couldn't deny Saffron anything.

If she said she wanted an image of me and Larry going at it in her pearl polishing bank for posterity's sake, I would absolutely take one for the team, just because she wanted it. That definitely had me out of sorts, but mostly in a confused way, when she stepped up into the cubby room and said, "but before you decide on that, before bed we normally all congregate in the Bath." Kinda funny.

I'd just been thinking about how weird it would be to get busy with my man Larry, but I hadn't thought about, y'know, his take on the subject. Or what the whole 'public bath' thing meant for him right now. Like, Karen's dudes totally took it in stride, stripping down and shoving their clothes and gear into their cubbies without a second thought.

Yeah, they stared a little at Karen as she shucked off the Yandere Shobitch Wedding Dress, but it's not like they were doing the Beavis and Butthead snicker while they did it. Just looking at scenery which I suddenly remembered was, for them, once and future terrain. Siobhan handed me off to Saffron for showering, and the two of us were, I guess, the example for everybody else.

Euryale and Stheno didn't shower, at least at first, but instead stood just outside shower range holding and handing washcloths, soap, and such to Bonnie and Larry as they scrubbed down little Lucas and each other. What with nobody else doing the 'sexy bathing' thing, Karen's Dragonslayers, who by now I'd picked up were Harold and Richard, although I still had no idea which was which, were a little hesitant at first.

After a couple whispered words from Karen, they each picked a shower and set to scrubbing themselves like they were in some kind of competition to see who could exfoliate the most layers of skin. What did you say to them? At Karen's sudden obvious blush, I thought, if you don't mind telling me, of course.

I'd sort of assumed she'd decided to stay silent, and gotten distracted when I glanced at Larry and Bonnie, trying to catch a glimpse of Lucas when he giggled, and getting a glimpse of something else entirely, when she replied, the words all coming across in one big rush, everything tastes better clean. I totally hid my laughter by kissing Saffron. No groping or anything, just a loving kiss between spouses.

Of course, Siobhan and Marie did the same shortly after, each stepping away from the little ones they'd been showering for a moment. Watching Larry escort Bonnie and Lucas into the Bath was incredibly sweet, reminding me exactly how much he doted on her and, apparently, his son. Even cuter when the little tyke started giggling and splashing, floating with his head just above water, his pudgy little fists clutching at his dad's fingers.

She shooed them off to slightly deeper water, where Larry could kneel and still be chest deep, then floated over to where Saffron, Siobhan, and I lounged with our heads propped on the side of the Bath. I couldn't hold it in any longer, although I had at least enough class to whisper.

"Holy shit, Bonnie. That's thing's as big as your arm." She snickered.

"I told you, Commander. Did you think I was exaggerating?"

"Yeah, kinda." As she sat there grinning, I said, "how does that even fit?"

"Oh, half the fun is making it fit." I thought about Saffron, and boy mode, and a certain reconstructed temple, and kinda dreamily said, "yeah. Yeah, I can see that." Then nearly lost my shit when Bonnie coyly said, "it almost seems you want to try for yourself. Do you, Commander?"

"Bonnie!" I spluttered out, "I, no, but, I, gah!" After a second more spluttering, I said, "I'm sure he's not interested." She shrugged.

"Yet I'm sure he'd do so if I asked him to." Saffron got back at me for every bit of fear I'd ever caused her as her next words filled me with silent terror.

"I'm sure Tabitha would if I asked her to, as well." I'm not sure exactly what was said after that. My brain kinda went on the fritz. Complete denial mode. Kinda thoughtlessly watched the kids bobbing over to gently play around Lucas, watching Larry be a good dad and let his son explore the water safely, play with the other kids just as freely and safely, never quite letting go of him, holding him whenever he seemed nervous, letting Lucas hold on when he seemed brave.

I noticed when Euryale and Stheno, dripping from the showers, joined the rest of us in the Bath, wandering over to where Marie had stretched out, then mirroring her. Weird that even naked, even sopping and still, I could pick Marie out. Maybe tell Stheno from Euryale, but definitely pick Marie out of the three of them.

Praise be to fates, god, Murphy, whoever, but Bonnie and Saffron did not decide to do irreparable damage to Larry and my psyches, and the Lancasters and their Maids chose to stay in the 'guess rooms' overnight. Pretty sure I saw Harold and Richard dropping their gear in separate rooms on the opposite side of the hall from the room Karen chose. Also pretty sure that the beds wouldn't need to be made in their rooms in the morning, what with the way they watched her carry her Garb into her room.

In case I haven't made it perfectly clear, I am absolutely thrilled that she's found companionship that suits her. Dreamt of my ladies throwing obviously fake yetis and Arabian horses into my Maw, giggling the whole time. Definitely didn't snatch said ladies up and gobble them down. More than once. Each. Look, they're tasty, and they deserved it, and I'm pretty sure the giggles and squeals of glee meant they loved it. In the morning, went out to the Courtyard with Karen and Larry.

Before we did anything else, I lay a hand on each of their shoulders and hit them with the Jotnar anti-frostbite Boon. Even with Karen in her Cadet uniform alongside Larry, it was still cold, and I wanted them to have their hands free.

"Can you guys use some Air Shields to clean this off while I go fetch something?" They nodded, and I hopped down to the Academy's smithy. Jon, just setting his forge up for the day, turned and smiled at me.

"Champion Diaz! I assume you're here for this?" He held out a cloth covered wooden bar. I nodded and took it.

"How long to make more?" He shrugged.

"If they're no more complex than that, we could make a few dozen in a day."

"Could you have, um, six dozen by Sunday afternoon?" That gave him a moment's pause, but after clearly doing some quick mental math, he said, "we can. Some minor maintenance will need to be rescheduled, but we can."

"Okay. I'll let you know by end of day today if we need any modifications." He nodded, and I stepped back to the Courtyard, then Co-Located enough to duplicate the one prototype into six, doing a bit of juggling and dropping as I did. If they couldn't take being dropped onto a hard stone slab, they definitely wouldn't do for what I wanted. When I'd finished, I had Larry and Karen's full attention.

"Okay, guys. I need to test a couple things before we get started. Karen, Blades?" She extended a Mana Blade from each forearm.

"Larry, Slayer?" He tilted his head as if to say, 'your funeral', but pulled Slayer from his belt and extended the Blade.

"Okay now, slowly, because I don't want to do any Reviving I don't have to, Larry, you swing at Karen. Karen, you block." She smiled, realizing I'd figured out exactly why she'd added the Mana Ward core to her blades. Larry slid through a picture perfect overhand chop, telegraphed to allow Karen to get her Blades up in an X and catch Slayer's Blade between them. Larry looked a little surprised.

"That's unexpected."

"Karen improved on the basic Mana Blade Shape. Added a Mana Ward core. Mana Wards being the one thing Mana Blades can't go through." Larry tilted his head.

"Not at all?" I shrugged and looked at Karen.

"Really, Champion?"

"Hey, Saffron's the Shaper in the household. I just wreck shit." She chuckled.

"And yet you came up with the Mana Blade Shape in the first place." I shrugged.

"Which is just the most efficient way to wreck shit." She paused in thought while the other two of us waited.

"I suppose if someone hit a Mana Ward with a Blade with enough Mana and force behind it, it might break. But the ratios would be..." She huffed out a pouty little sigh.

"I know of but one being who might have that much Mana, and even then, I'm not sure if she could overcome even my Mana Ward."

"Okay, so we can assume that folks dueling with Mana Blades of Karen's design are going to have to..." Larry interrupted me with a gasp.

"Slayer has no edge... No, that's not it. Slayer is all edge. I've never thought of that before. I..." He trailed off as he took a few steps back, then started to move across the Courtyard, shadow fencing, but altering his steps and strokes as he moved.

"Yeah, that would be exactly why he's here. You know more about the theory behind Mana Blades than anybody else except maybe the Imperator. He's an expert swordsman who also happens to have a Mana Blade. And now..." I paused a moment, then called out, "hey, Larry!" He looked over, startled by how far from us he'd gotten.

"Oh! Apologies, Commander! The permutations of... Apologies, I was distracted." I laughed.

"You got distracted by exactly what I asked you here to do. But..." I waved him over, and he jogged back to us.

"Put those away?" They retracted their Blades while I picked up two of the prototypes Jon had made.

"I had Jon whip up one of these and duplicated it. It's about the same size as a Mana Blade, I think? Same size as the ones I use when I'm using them as swords, anyhow, and I'm pretty sure most Bladeplay is gonna wind up using ones that size." I paused.

"But I'm not sure sure. So today the three of us are gonna use these to spar with, so tonight I can tell Smith Jon whether he needs to tweak the design at all." I definitely needed every bit of rest I'd gotten yesterday. Hell, the two of them wound up needing it, as I delivered multiple Stabilizes through the day, because it turns out that Karen was almost as much of a sword nerd as Larry.

I mean, I've studied, and practiced, and no doubt or question been in more life-or-death scraps than either of them, but when it came to swording, even the pseudo-swording of Blades and wooden pseudo-Blades, I'm pretty sure Karen had me beat, and Larry was just on another level. Like, she could understand what he was doing, and maybe defend herself mostly, but could barely see what he was doing.

I could see it, but didn't understand it on that deep level, and nine times out of ten I wound up getting my knuckles cracked hard enough to lose my grip on my baton. The batons in question were an inch and a half thick at their center, just over three feet long, with blunt, rounded ends and a sort of spindle shape to the shaft. Made of some kind of hardwood, they'd been covered in the same tough burlap fabric as Squadballs normally were, and had the same dusty red dye impregnated in them.

Not that any of us needed that to tell us when we'd been hit. Or to tell the others, because swearing was the order of the day, even for three folks who'd played plenty of Squadball in our time. At the end of the day, as we all sat tailor style on the cold stone of the Courtyard pavers, Larry panted out, "Commander, I get why you called us here. Blades. But... why the wood, and why the covering?"

After he said that, he gave in and sank backwards until he lay on the cold paver, steam rising off him the way it rose off all three of us.

"Because," I said as I followed his brilliant example, "you are looking at the new Squadballs."

"They're not," Karen groaned as her back hit the paver.

"Balls though." I snorted.

"Kinda look like something else, now that you mention it."

"Commander," said Larry, a slight warning tone in his voice. When I grunted in acknowledgement, he said, "I might take exception if you start referring to these as 'Larrys' or 'Laurences'." I couldn't help it, I barked out a laugh, then said, "Aw, c'mon, Larry. I'd never do you like that." After a pause where he started stretching to keep himself from tightening up too much, and Karen and I followed his example, I said, "I'd never call you out like that, Larry. Right Karen?"

She smiled at him beatifically and said, "of course not. That would be most inappropriate." I nodded.

"Lancasters it is then."