Chương 156: Chapter 152

The ride over to Play's fortress of solitude was uneventful to Wade. The only issue had been at the start, in convincing Zin to carry the empty copper lootbox into the trunk of the SUV. Turns out, without stacking strength buffs, stat points, or blackrot to help, pure metal box of dull copper was really goddamn heavy. But the Archdemon was in a very good mood given their next target, so it only took a little bit of banal bribery to get him to bring the thing back.

Wade wasn't sure what he'd do or how he'd sell it, but they had it on hand now for the future. They didn't even get a single person to look at them twice hauling the chest out of the hospital. Everyone was too haggard to bother investigating. Ultimately, Ann would recover on her own according to Medy, and nothing the group could do here would change much. The healing had been done, and when her brain was ready to turn back on, it would. It could be later today or sometime tomorrow.

Wade didn't want mess things up with an early attempt to wake her up. Besides, the nursing home would call him when she was lucid again. They wouldn't have a choice. Annabelle Wade was not someone who would ever be shoved in a corner without someone getting their fingers bitten off. It was Jason who volunteered to stay behind and keep an eye on her.

"Go on," He'd told him.

"I've got plenty on my to-do in researching, and a lot of it involves listening to lectures. I can do that right here without issue." He waved a phone at him.

"Legs need the workout, hands work just fine. I'll keep her company in case she wakes up early and needs to see a friendly face first." So the crew had left him to it, heading back to pick up Leon and Bael, and then drive directly to handle Play. Wade spent the trip texting Illy and eventually all had a group chat when it came to the latest news of what Zin was now on the hook for.

"And so we end up right back at the start of all problem: Money." Zin said, steadily driving the car.

"I've got to figure out how to setup a refugee camp on Earth and that's going to take funds. And I don't mean the cute pocket change you can do maxing out your credit card. Not even all the copper in that chest is going to make a dent on the bill."

"I thought you were already halfway there given the connections you got?" Wade asked.

"Can't you dig into that direction?"

"Amigo, you forget. Immortality means we think on a much longer term scale than mortals do in general. I don't die of old age and a bad cough. I get to live multiple lifetimes worth of beautiful compounding interest. And unlike certain degenerates, I don't touch day 0 DTE's, options in general, and especially not any wall street bets. Few stocks here, couple bits into the S&P 500 every few months, maybe even look into some tax loopholes as a treat, real sophisticated long-term planning.

And then I go right back to enjoying my self-care hot tub and cappuccino time, all stress-free just as your founding fathers intended." The Archdemon had an odd amount to say on the subject. Mostly that Earth was the paradise for immortal beings, or anyone living past three hundred years. Anyone who lived that long and wasn't filthy rich by year one hundred fifty was an absolute moron.

On his end, once Zin had completed most of the cleaning in his region, he'd settled a monthly payoff from the local criminal underground, carefully keeping the amount reasonable enough that the drug dealers would rather toss him some cash and call it square rather than try to oust him. After that, he'd kicked his expensive two thousand dollar shoes up on the table and let the money fund itself. With his earlier stated hot tub and cappuccinos. Something that was very important to the entire experience apparently.

"Only thing I can't plan for is the pint-sized gremlin ahead of us. Half my GOOD restaurant budget vanishes into her bottomless pit of a stomach for plastic or cardboard. It's absolutely tragic. And not even a drop in the bucket for what's needed wrangling an entire refugee population here. So start thinking some get-rich-quick schemes champ, we're going to need them." Wade's immediate thought to all this turned right back to the other rich person he knew in his group.

On texting with Illy, Wade had learned a few things from the scottish 'heiress' besides some new curse words to add to his vocabulary of things never to say in polite society. She really had been exiled from her family, and the stipend from that family was generally untouched for anything out of principle. But she'd be willing to use it up for this kind of emergency when Leon suggested they pool their resources together on the group chat.

It would be enough to bankroll the three for gear and supplies, and absolutely nowhere near the needed amount to cover even a small part of what building a new underground city might cost. At best, maybe she could assist once her family was looped in, but that would involve looping Wade and Leon in. Illy could handle her own family being in the picture, but until she knew for certain there wouldn't be governmental experiment and detaining happening, she would wait and see first.

Which meant they remained in a pickle. You guys are taking this way too seriously, the answer's right in the car.

"Hey everyone, the NEET who had me spend four hundred dollars on a limited edition body pillow has opinions on financial responsibility." Zin gave a head roll that was so exaggerated Wade was worried he'd lose sight on the road and crash somehow.

"Don't shoot the messenger." Wade shrugged, "I'm just reading what she's sending. Speaking of, she says…" Zinny you literally spent 200 dollars on a wagyu steak dinner ٩(◕‿◕)۶"Did we forget the part about the good restaurant budget? That was a business expense." you ate it alone in the restaurant and then tipped 20%" Business. Expense. I'm investing in my mental health and happiness. And how do you even know what I've been up to?!" And the quite generous tip? From your bank account?

Zin narrowed his eyes, fingers drumming the wheel.

"She's trying to throw us off her trail and buy every last second she can in that basement. Don't listen to her." Bael watched the argument with the quiet patience. He didn't know enough of this world to comment on the financial aspects, but the Archdemon had given his word he would work through and give their kind a home here. One way or another it would be getting done. This was teething issues. Medy pressed her nose against the window, completely uninvolved. Wade decided to mediate.

"Play, if you've got a better plan, let's hear it." Well now I don't wanna.

"All right. Zin, we should talk strategy on how to extricate her out of the basement. I say we start with shutting off the internet." Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings. (≖､≖╬) What do rich people want more than anything?

"To stay rich." Zin rolled his eyes. Mortal desires.

"More rich." Bael agreed. He'd been around enough mortals to know the common denominator among those who had amassed wealth, regardless of their different race.

"Health." Leon answered before Wade could agree with the demons.

"Angry little goddess wanting us to sell healing to rich people, using butler's connections to start with. Da?" See, that wasn't so hard to figure out smh It was quiet in the care for a moment.

"… I hate that it's not wrong." Zin muttered.

"High praise." Wade nodded.

"Don't you dare, Mr. Wade."

"Is healing really that important?" Medy asked, ungluing her face from the window.

"I thought your sister was a special case? I mean, I did notice a lot of humans in the nursing home looked really weird for humans. I thought it was a new mortal fashion here." Wade opened his mouth. Then closed it. Because earlier Zin had mentioned people died of old age and cancer. As if that was something unique and different from back in Azdrial. And the divine ring of healing had been considered basically starter gear by the system handing him a healer bundle. Useable by complete rookies to magic.

Which meant that kind of gear was common. Wade's head ran the numbers and came to one potential conclusion: Divine healing in Azdrial was cheap enough that nobody died looking like crumpled paper, even the poor. And that meant wrinkles weren't a thing in Azdrial. And that meant Wade Skincare Pharmaceuticals Incorporated didn't need to start with the company. They just needed to sucker in one single rich asshat, and have that asshat bring his friends right after.

They'll pay up the nose for something that would become everyday goods after Wade got his way. Eri looked away from the window and over to the car occupants now looking him over, minus Medy who was busy paying attention back to more important things. She was already used to Wade's bouts of mania. There was a single issue to the plan: The healer himself. Wade might be able to do it, but there was only one person who could do it on scale.

The skeleton cracked his neck, then clicked his teeth and very carefully pulled his aviator glasses up, so the rest of his rorschach mask could be seen. if he had eyebrows he'd be wagging them suggestively.

"We'll pay you in hats." Wade sighed. Eri clicked his teeth again. Not good enough.

"Fine, we'll get you that pope hat today. Zin, let's take a pit stop to Party City or halloween spirit." The butler cursed loudly. ＼(٥⁀▽⁀)／ Have fun with the detour, take your time now~ Wade suddenly had an even better idea the moment he considered Eri in a pope hat.

"Wait, Zin, could also introduce Eri as the grim reaper or something? Properly spook your connections into thinking there's conditions to the deal, supernatural things, maybe make sure they don't rat us out to anyone like that?"

"You want a cult Mr. Wade? Because that's how you start a cult." Zin jabbed a thumb behind him at the skeleton.

"And that one will be the ringleader. Think about that." Eri considered the idea of the grim reaper according to what he was being fed by Market's language blessing, and decided that a hood would make for a good addition to his growing collection. He'd wear the hood and the pope hat. Surely nothing would go wrong with that combination. Zin promised he'd make a few calls and get things started soon enough. After all, there'd be room to take a hearty commission for him. Which meant more hot tubs and cappuccinos.

And also some fundamental construction of an entire demonic refugee city. Details. Three hours and a side trip for a pope hat later, their car finally rolled up to the fortress of the NEETess. Play's hidden lair among the mortals turned out to be rather bog standard and very much hidden in plain sight. If the hiding attempt was even intentional.

"This is where she's hiding?" Wade asked, looking over the location. Their car had rolled through a straight neighborhood grid. The kind of place Wade consider to be an excellent cost-to-benefit ratio. Absolutely condemning words.

"Home sweet prison." Zin killed the engine in front of the home.

"What, expected something bigger?"

"You're not afraid of anyone finding her here?"

"If they did and shot or broke anything she owns, I would bring a foldable chair and a bucket of popcorn with me. Maybe a good pair of sunglasses too." Wade looked it over again. A rather small house all in all, and one he could probably rent out with only a single roommate.

"The divine NEET only cares about a basement to dwell in, and prefers no windows." Zin stretched, and got out of the car.

"She hasn't seen the outside of this house in months now. On account of the sunlight and grass out here."

"Why this house?" Wade asked.

"Was it the only one with a basement?"

"I had a storage container at the start where I stuffed her in, but Play made herself a nuisance and we got kicked out. I didn't have that many contacts back then. Made something work as fast as I could with my half-broken english at the time."

"You learned english?" Zin gave him a pat on the head, as if he found the mortal endearing.

"What's the matter Champ? Surprised we're not all cheating with a language blessing? I started out here on Earth with basically nothing on my back except for the NEET. Don't get me started on the horrors I had to face before I became the upstanding self-made man you see today." You should go treat yourself to some steak and a high quality massage, you deserve it for all the work you put in boo~ (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ Zin stared at the text. The grin started to spread over his face and went wider than should be natural.

"Oh, she's desperate all right." Eri unfolded from the backseat, the proud new owner of a pope hat, which very much didn't match the Watchman costume he'd come with, but Eri did not have a single care in the world about that. The first thing he did was crouch straight down to the lawn. Then he put his entire face on the concrete so he could look eye to eye with the first few blades of grass. It looked like he was hunting for insects.

"Eri," Wade started, "By random chance… uh, did the Nathir not have any grass or plants growing anywhere in their city?" The skeleton waved him off. No, they didn't. It was mushrooms, vermin and whatever sludge the Nathir could offer, but Eri had no real way to pass that message along to Wade, and was currently too occupied touching grass and enjoying the sunlight. And, of course, he wasn't alone. Zin rolled his eyes.

"Medy, babe, darling, bestie. We're going to cause an accident when someone drives by gawking and hits a parked car at all this."

"But it's a completely different world's plants!" She protested.

"Look! LOOK! How do they maintain it? Why do they need so much of this type of plant?!"

"Maybe we can leave them outside?" Wade shrugged as Medy continued to rattle off her burning questions about the grass. Naw, stay outside with them! Go explore the neighborhood, have a nice walk, it's healthy for normies!

"Truly desperate." Zin's grin actually looked genuine for the first time since Wade knew the Archdemon. If you touch the router, this goddess will show you the true meaning of terror.

"As in she'll start crying and won't stop throwing a tantrum until we turn the internet back on." Wade translated.

"Mr. Wade, you've already sold me a while back, you don't need to convince me further." Play sent an animated image of a cat hissing.

"Leon, can you keep an eye over Medy and Eri here? Zin and I are going to handle the NEET infestation." He then looked over to the towering Satyr, who was still half-dressed in a business suit.

"I think Bael can hang out in the living room to hide from gawkers." The Saytr gave a shrug. Mortals, you tread upon hallowed ground. Beware, a goddess such as myself does not take to blasphemy lightly. Touch upon the sacred artifacts within my domain at your peril. Wade sent back a spray bottle image. The doorway opened up and revealed a rather plain living room that was clearly used for storage rather than actual living, although everything was meticulously organized and clean.

Which made sense because half of the supplies here were dedicated for cleaning. Leaving Bael behind, Zin and Wade slowly advanced to the basement section leading downwards.

"Did you really get the only house on the block with an actual basement?"

"You'd be surprised but this was actually the best deal on the block at the time. The basement was more a happy accident. She's just lucky it ended up this way. I was getting the first thing I coul-" The archdemon stopped in his tracks.

"Wait a minute. Did she get Market to rig this? She DID, didn't she? Unbelievable. Un-be-LIEVABLE." There was further muttering of revenge and possible threats to the internet, anime figures, and return threats back from a certain goddess hiding behind a single half-closed doorway from the comfort of her couch, but Zin and Wade finally stood before her domain. The wires were what clued him in, all coming from the living room router and power outlets, neatly organized and fed into the half-closed doorway.

"It's oddly well done for wiring." Wade whistled. In fact, the more he looked at the house, the more he realized there wasn't any dust or dirt anywhere. It was like the hallways had been mopped and clean on regular intervals. Zin pulled at his necktie, straightening it up.

"Professionals have standards Mr. Wade. I'd have sawed a small hole in the door, but when she sealed herself in there and marked her territory as divine, that includes the doorway. Hardest part of all this was getting fresh air cycling inside there. She doesn't need to breathe, but what do you know, I do. And that comes with a nose." Wade got a few more angry texts from the goblin lurking behind the dark room ahead, but he knew Play wouldn't bar their path.

After all, he had a single storefront coin to spend from the Alchemy questline thus far, and quite a few options already unlocked. If he could access the storefront here on Earth, it would be more than worth it to trespass on her domain like this and possibly knock an anime figure off a shelf. By accident of course.