Chương 100: Chapter : 100

Ken suddenly chuckled, remembering Sayma paying the informant.

"Oh, and don't worry about Sayma's money. When she tossed those three gold coins to the old man, she felt the metal leave her hand. But the coins never actually existed in the real world. I just used my magic to instantly teleport her gold coins right back into her own pocket. She didn't lose a single dime. I am a slacker, not a thief." Ken stretched his arms high above his head, letting out a massive, highly dramatic yawn. The fourth-wall break was fun, but he was already getting tired of explaining things.

"So, yeah. That is my big secret for the day," Ken summarized, looking at the audience one last time.

"People think illusion magic is only for fighting or tricking your enemies. But honestly? It is the absolute best tool for avoiding chores. I just gave the elite girls a perfect quest marker, and now they are going to do all the heavy lifting in the dungeon while I complain about my feet hurting." Suddenly, a loud, angry voice echoed from the main street outside the alley.

"Ken! Where are you?!" Naomi's voice shouted angrily.

"If you don't get out here right now, I am leaving you behind!" Ken instantly dropped the confident, relaxed posture. He rapidly scrambled his hair to make it look even messier. He yanked the left side of his shirt so it hung completely untucked over his belt, and he intentionally loosened his tie until it was totally crooked. The cool, secret mastermind vanished completely, replaced instantly by the clumsy, complaining potato boy.

"I'm coming, boss lady!" Ken yelled back, making sure his voice cracked just a little bit to sound pathetic. He looked at the "camera" one last time and gave a quick, goofy wink.

"Alright, duty calls," Ken whispered with a lazy grin.

"Time to go pretend I am absolutely terrified of a dark cave. Wish me luck!" Ken turned around and started jogging clumsily down the alleyway. He made sure to drag his shoes against the cobblestones, creating his signature, highly annoying scuffing sound. He popped out of the alley and bumped right into Naomi, who was tapping her foot impatiently. Laxmi and Zinia were already holding bags full of glowing torches and extra healing potions.

"There you are," Naomi scolded him, grabbing his arm so he couldn't wander off again.

"What took you so long? You don't even have shoelaces on those cheap boots!"

"I got distracted!" Ken lied smoothly, giving her his best, most innocent puppy-dog eyes.

"I saw a really cool looking beetle on the ground. But more importantly, are we stopping for sandwiches before we go to this terrifying dungeon? Because fighting monsters on an empty stomach is basically a crime against humanity!" If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

"No sandwiches!" Laxmi laughed, tossing a heavy bag of supplies right into Ken's arms.

"You carry the extra torches, farm boy. And don't drop them!"

"My spine is already breaking!" Ken whined loudly, catching the bag awkwardly and slouching forward as if it weighed a thousand pounds.

"I am just a fragile servant! I am not a pack mule!" Sayma offered a polite, gentle smile.

"Just follow us, Ken. The Blood Fault Dungeon is outside the city limits. We have a long walk ahead of us."

"A long walk into a dark cave filled with giant angry bugs," Ken complained dramatically, dragging his feet as the team started marching toward the city gates.

"This is the worst day ever. I really, really hope my lucky blue ring actually works, because we are definitely going to need it." Naomi just rolled her eyes and kept walking. Sayma reviewed her notes, entirely convinced she had just cracked the mystery through brilliant street intelligence. The entire 13th Unit felt fully prepared and totally in control of the situation.

None of them had absolutely any idea that their entire mission, their strategy, and their current path had been perfectly hand-crafted by the lazy, complaining boy stumbling along behind them. The stage was completely set. The race for the Core of Luminus was officially on, and Ken Eliot was exactly where he wanted to be: safely hiding in the background, ready to watch the show.

"Are we there yet?" Ken Eliot asked loudly, letting out a massive, dramatic sigh. He was dragging his feet as he walked, making his cheap boots scuff against the dirt path. Scuff. Scuff. Scuff. He had his hands shoved deep into his pockets, and his shoulders were completely slouched forward. He looked absolutely miserable.

"You asked that exact same question five minutes ago, farm boy," Naomi snapped without looking back. She was marching at the front of the group right next to Princess Iris. Her bright red hair bounced slightly with every step.

"And the answer is still no. We are not there yet. Keep walking."

"But my legs are currently on strike!" Ken complained, stopping in the middle of the dirt road. He pointed down at his brand-new navy blue suit pants.

"And my new clothes are getting totally ruined! There is dust everywhere! I thought we were going to take a fancy luxury car to the dungeon. Why are we walking like normal people?" Laxmi, the hot-headed fire user, turned around and walked backward just so she could laugh at him.

"Because the Blood Fault Dungeon is totally off the main roads, Ken! Cars can't drive over these rocky hills. Besides, a little bit of fresh air and cardio is good for you. You look like you need the exercise."

"I do not need exercise! I need a comfortable chair and a large glass of iced tea!" Ken whined, giving Laxmi his best, most innocent puppy-dog eyes.

"Hey, Laxmi. You look incredibly strong today. Do you think you could carry me the rest of the way? I am very light. I practically weigh nothing." Laxmi snorted, punching her open palm to create a tiny spark of orange fire.

"If you don't start walking right now, I am going to light your shoes on fire. Then you will run all the way to the dungeon." Ken immediately started walking again, his eyes wide in fake panic.

"Okay, okay! I am walking! No need to get violent! You guys have zero respect for the lazy community." Luna, the lightning user, was walking right next to Zinia. Luna actually had her eyes completely closed. She had one hand firmly holding onto Zinia's shoulder, letting the tough earth magic user guide her down the path so she could essentially sleep while walking.

"I actually agree with Ken," Luna mumbled lazily, letting out a huge yawn.

"Walking is the worst. If I knew we had to hike a mountain today, I would have stayed in my bed. Why do the magical items always have to be hidden in the middle of nowhere?" Zinia just chuckled, easily supporting Luna's weight.

"Because if they were hidden in the city, someone would have found them years ago. Don't worry, Luna. We are almost there."