Chương 611: Rules for Memorials

I was originally a commoner, farming in Chenliu. My talents and learning are shallow, and I am unfit for great responsibility... I am grateful for Your Majesty's favor in appointing me as the Prefect of Ningzhou in Jiangnan. I have done my humble service, but it is far from enough to repay Your Majesty's kindness. Whenever I think of Your Majesty's boundless grace, I am filled with anxiety day and night, unable to eat or sleep properly. I am filled with trepidation and fear, and I bow my head repeatedly.

Your Majesty works tirelessly day and night, attending to countless affairs of state. I should not trouble you with trivial matters. However, the disaster in Ningzhou is urgent, and I dare not conceal it. Therefore, I risk my life to speak out..."

He read for five minutes... When he got to this point, Xun You couldn't read anymore. He wiped the sweat from his forehead and looked at Liu Ce awkwardly.

Liu Ce raised his hand to interrupt him, took the memorial and red pen, and in front of all the civil and military officials, began to write down the first line with a "swish swish swish".

Where the red pen stroked, all the praise and flattery on the paper were crossed out, leaving not a single word behind.

I used the red pen too hard, almost tearing the paper, and the ink seeped into the next page.

After scrolling for a full two and a half minutes, Liu Ce finally stopped and tossed the memorial back to Xun You:

"Keep reading. Read the parts I didn't mark."

Xun You flipped through the pages, searching for a long time, before finally finding a patch the size of a fingernail at the very bottom of the last page that wasn't covered by red ink. He leaned closer, squinted, and whispered:

"... Since September, Haining and Haiyan counties of Ningzhou Prefecture have been hit by torrential rains, causing tidal surges that have flooded fertile fields and displaced countless people... Your Majesty has already opened the treasury to distribute grain for relief, but this is far from enough. I earnestly request the Imperial Court to provide an additional 500, 000 shi of grain and 5 million coins to aid the disaster victims.

Your Majesty is filled with trepidation and humility, and bows your head repeatedly. Wang Huaiping, Prefect of Ningzhou, Jiangnan Province, September 5th, the sixth year of the Shenwu reign."

After the reading was finished, the entire court fell silent for a moment.

Everyone is stupid.

Liu Ce crossed out more than 2, 800 words in red ink in a memorial that was over 3, 000 words long, leaving only the more than 100 words that were the real important matters.

Liu Ce slowly stood up and descended the steps again. His voice wasn't loud, but every word pierced the heart, like nails driven into the ground:

"You all saw it. More than three thousand words! More than two thousand three hundred words praising me, more than two hundred words expressing loyalty, more than three hundred words of nonsense, and only a little over one hundred words getting to the point! The proportions are seriously unbalanced!"

"I handle state affairs from nine in the morning until five in the afternoon, not to watch you write essays or flatter me! My time is very precious!"

"The people are suffering from disaster, waiting for the court's life-saving grain. A single day's delay could mean many starve to death! And you, instead of writing a proper memorial, spend half the time praising me. By the time I finish reading your nonsense, it'll be too late! The disaster victims will have already starved to death!"

He walked up to Wang Huaiping, the prefect of Ningzhou.

Wang Huaiping was already terrified, his face ashen. He knelt down with a thud and kowtowed repeatedly, his forehead bleeding from the repeated blows, his voice trembling.

"Your Majesty, please forgive me! I know I'm guilty! I'll never dare to do it again! From now on, I will write shorter memorials and only discuss important matters! I'm willing to accept punishment!"

"Get up," Liu Ce said calmly, his tone softening.

"I won't kill you. But this pointless memorial you wrote has delayed disaster relief efforts and wasted my time. You are fined three months' salary, and the memorial is sent back for rewriting. Your superior, Li Cheng, the governor of Jiangnan Province, was not strict enough in his review; he is fined one month's salary. If he does it again, the fine will be doubled!"

"Thank you for your great kindness, Your Majesty! Thank you for your great kindness, Your Majesty!" Wang Huaiping breathed a sigh of relief, kowtowed several more times, and then got up and stood back in the ranks. His legs were still shaking, and the back of his official robes was soaked with sweat.

Liu Ce walked back to the dragon throne, resting his chin on his hand as he pondered whether he should produce the eight-legged essay.

Later generations have always felt deeply distressed when they mention the eight-legged essay system for selecting officials, feeling that it stifled thought and stifled talent, and have criticized it for hundreds of years.

But they overlooked a fundamental fact.

Everything that exists has its reasons, and everything in history has two sides.

The ancients were limited by the times, but they were not stupid. On the contrary, they were very smart. They must have had their reasons for inventing the eight-legged essay.

For the eight-legged essay to have a positive effect, the key lies in how the imperial court acts and what it guides people to learn.

If we treat the eight-legged essay as a standardized format rather than a mental constraint, and combine it with multidisciplinary education, it might achieve unexpected results.

If the eight-legged essay had continued to develop healthily, wouldn't it have become the "Essay Writing" and "Administrative Aptitude Test" in the civil service examinations of later generations?

The test assesses logic, format, and organization, not thought processes.

Moreover, he himself had already suppressed the Confucianism that held the view that "all other professions are inferior, only studying is superior," allowing various schools of thought to develop together, and emphasizing that applying knowledge to practical use is the true principle...

Then Liu Ce patted the dragon table, bringing everyone back to their senses:

"You can't entirely blame yourself for what happened today. This kind of rubbish writing style has been around for a long time; you've written it your whole lives, and you're used to it. But being used to it doesn't mean it's right."

In the past, information wasn't readily available... so writing a little extravagance didn't matter. Now we have roads and post stations... even a day's delay is a big deal!

"In order to make you write less nonsense and do more important things in the future, I have decided to abolish the old memorial format and implement the new memorial standard from today onwards."

I have ordered the drafting of the "Regulations for Memorials to the Throne," which will be immediately printed and distributed to all ministries and provinces. All officials, regardless of rank, must strictly adhere to them! Anyone who violates them will be punished!

Li Dequan immediately took a thick stack of booklets and distributed them to each of the ministers, one booklet for each person.

Liu Ce picked up a book, pointed to the articles, and read them aloud one by one. When he got to the funny parts, he couldn't help but laugh, and the officials laughed along with him.

"First rule: all polite phrases are hereby abolished! Phrases like 'Your Majesty,' 'I am filled with trepidation,' and 'I bow my head repeatedly'—if you dare write even one of those, your memorial will be rejected immediately! Get straight to the point at the beginning, and end with your request! Anyone who dares to write 'I am filled with trepidation,' I will make sure they are truly terrified, and punish them by making them kneel at the palace gate for a whole day! Until their legs break!"

"Secondly, no quoting classical texts or spouting lofty principles! No quoting the Four Books or Five Classics... no parallelism, antithesis, or metaphors! Speak plainly, in simple terms! I'm not as cultured as you; I don't understand those archaic phrases! Anyone who dares to use a classical allusion again will be made to copy it a hundred times! Until they can recite it from memory!"

"Thirdly, one matter at a time! A single memorial can only address one issue! If you want to report on the disaster, impeach an official, and request a promotion all at the same time, write three memorials! Anyone who dares to combine all three into one memorial will have it rejected immediately! I don't have time to categorize them for you!"

"Article Four: Summary First, Results First! Every memorial must begin with no more than fifty characters, clearly stating: who, where, what happened, and what they are requesting me to do. Then, write the process and reasons! Anyone who dares to put the results at the end will have their memorial thrown away! Throwed into the fire pit!"

"Fifth rule: No rare characters allowed! You're making it seem like you're all highly educated. My education level is low; I can't understand those rare characters! Anyone who dares to use a character I don't recognize will be punished by becoming my character tutor for a month! Teach me ten characters every day, and you won't be allowed to leave until you've learned them all!"

Liu Ce read a few more lines, all written in plain language and easy to understand.