Chương 3: Chapter 2 - Convincing Death

Big Jacky was sitting at his desk, staring at me with his empty eye-sockets.

"Explain this to me again. Slowly." Beside me, I heard Darius let out a tiny sigh. I had asked him to come along to lend some gravitas to my request.

"It's a celebration," Iset said with the kind of patience that only comes from having lived for a couple of millennia. She had come along to help explain. Jacky turned his skull toward her.

"But she says she's not a Christian."

"It's not strictly a Christian holiday. Humans living in the colder regions have always had some kind of feast or celebration around the winter solstice."

"Yeah!" I chimed in.

"Half of it's pagan anyway."

"Pagan." From the dark, flat tone of Jacky's voice, I figured I had made a mistake.

"Are you pagan, Emerra?"

"What do you guys have against religion?"

"I don't like gods," Jacky said.

"They think they're a bunch of big-shot celebrities, but they never do a lap of work."

"A lick," Darius muttered.

"This isn't about gods!" I said.

"You're the one that keeps bringing them up," Jacky noted.

"It's an excuse! We celebrate because winter's dark and cold and we want to have some fun. We use gods as an excuse so that we don't get in trouble for it."

"Why would you get into trouble for having fun?"

"Maybe the gods don't want people enjoying themselves unless they're invited," Darius said.

"That does sound like a god," Jacky admitted.

"But why a tree?"

"It's an evergreen," I said. Iset added, "Winter used to be a bleak time with very little color. Since all the other trees died during the winter, conifers were some of the last greenery available. People brought them inside to celebrate life."

"Trees don't die in the winter."

"Of course. You're right, Jacky. I meant that they went dormant."" I would know if they died. All the trees dying? Every year? Can you imagine?"

"Yes, Jacky."

"No, the only trees that die in the winter are the ones that are cut down and dragged inside to celebrate life." Darius and I glanced at each other. Iset hummed as she tried to think of a response.

"Oh, don't bother explaining," Jacky said.

"Killing something to celebrate life sounds exactly like something a human would do."

"We could get fake trees," I offered.

"What? And take all the murder out of a perfectly good holiday?"

"They don't shed any needles." The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement.

"But they don't smell good either," the count said.

"Darius," Jacky sounded surprised, "I never thought you would have an opinion." The vampire stood up straighter.

"My opinion is that if you're going to do a thing, you should do it right."

"An excellent sentiment." Jacky turned to me.

"What else does this holiday involve?"

"Well, there's more decorations."

"More than the trees?"

"Yeah. Quite a lot, actually. Garlands, mistletoe, holly—""Parasites and thorns? I'm confused again. What exactly are you celebrating?" I ignored him.

"There's Christmas songs and Christmas movies. You get treats, hot chocolate, and cookies…Oh! And on Christmas Day, there's usually a big feast where everyone gets together."

"Difficult, in our situation," Iset noted.

"Two of us don't eat."

"There are games! People play games. People…people spend time together," I finished rather lamely. After a second of silence, Darius said, "You forgot the presents." My nose wrinkled in distaste before I could stop it. Of course, Noctis latched on to that idea.

"Presents?" Darius must have seen my expression. When I looked at him, he only raised an eyebrow. I said to Jacky.

"Some people give presents to their children—""To each other," Iset corrected me gently.

"—but it's not a big deal. We don't have to."

"Oh?" Jacky said.

"That's not the fun part of Christmas."

"Then what is the fun part of Christmas?"

"The Christmas tree lights" was my instant answer.

"And the food."

"Does this really matter to you, Emerra?" My stomach twisted, and I felt a hot flush rush up my neck and into my cheeks, but I forced myself to say yes in a firm voice. Jacky's finger bones flourished outward in an open-handed shrug.

"Then my house and means are at your disposal." I bounced on my feet.

"Thank you, Jacky!"

"But if you're going to do it, I want it done right." He stood up.

"Tell Igor to prepare a feast and nevermind his grumbling. I also want there to be presents." My moan was cut short when he pointed a thin finger bone at my face.

"I think one per person will do nicely. I don't care who gives to whom." He turned to Iset.

"Can I leave that for you to figure out?" The mummy nodded.

"Darius," Jacky said.

"Sir?"

"Would you be kind enough to oversee Emerra's decorating?"

"Well—""Do you have any assignments right now?"

"Not at the moment, but—""I trust you to check her enthusiasm against your good taste."

"I understand. I suppose I can act as the voice of reason in this fiasco." I tried not to feel too insulted. Jacky straightened his tie, then walked toward the door.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm afraid I have an appointment." He stopped short of the threshold.

"Emerra."

"Yes?"

"No gods."

"Huh?"

"Don't invite any gods. We can enjoy ourselves without them." I was about to correct him, but then I decided it wouldn't be worth the hassle. I saluted.

"Understood." After he left, I turned to Darius and Iset.

"Some ground rules," the vampire said.

"There will be no inflatable Santas or snowmen of any kind. In fact, if it has the word 'inflatable' associated with it, cross it off your wish list. We live in one of the most beautiful examples of Victorian architecture on this continent. Our decorations are going to be traditional." I clapped my hands up by my face. It was that or explode from excitement. Vasil went on, "No colored lights on the trees either. White or yellow will look much better." I groaned.

"For goodness sake, Darius," Iset said.

"Why not simply go with candles?"

"I said 'traditional,' not 'stupid.' We wouldn't want to see this lovely mansion go up in flames, now would we?"

"What? And take all the havoc out of a perfectly good holiday?"

"Can I trust you and Olivia to work on some proper wreaths while we're gone?"

"Proper ones?"

"Considering this house…"

"Oh. I see. I'm afraid Olivia was up late, spelling. It might be a while before she wakes up, but I can do the research while she sleeps."

"Thank you."

"Where will you be going?"

"Emerra and I have to go out and get some trees. What do you think? One for each floor?"

"Let's see." Iset counted on her bandaged fingers.

"The front hall, the great landing, and the long gallery. Yes, I think three will be enough. I'll call Mrs. Park and have her bring in some tree stands and lights." Darius called out, "Conrad?" From outside the door, we heard Conrad's deep voice: "Sir?"

"You were listening?" He stepped into view.

"Yes, sir."

"Will you help us get the trees?"

"Of course."

"Do you think the snow is deep enough for the sledge?" Sledge? I thought. Isn't that a hammer?

"Easily. Especially if we're heading up into the forest." Did he mean sled? But no. This was Darius, not Noctis.

"Excellent," the vampire said.

"I'll get some snowshoes and meet you both at the garage in fifteen minutes." We all left the study together. I walked beside Conrad all the way to the front stairs, but he didn't turn to go up.

"Don't you need to change into something warmer?" I asked.

"Nope."

"Hey, what's a sledge?" He turned a very wolfish smile to me.

"Go get that nice warm coat of yours, Mera. You're going to need it."