Chương 23: Upgrade

Grim gave Hazel a deadpan stare, "Do you want to help or should I use my teeth." Hazel had the social acumen to look embarrassed, she didn't want to take away from her moment too much but she didn't want to rip into her bandage like an animal.

"Sorry! You don't usually like it when people help you, so I just thought..." She trailed off.

"That's not— It's fine. You're different anyways."

"Because I'm a shadow?"

"No, you're just... You're okay, you are a good— I trust you alright? Can you just take off the stupid bandage please?" Grim begged. Hazel's mouth crept up into a mischievous grin as she strutted towards Grim, "I'm what? Go on, you were saying something." Oh, she was so annoying. Grim scowled, "You're not awful." Hazel leaned forward with her hands behind her back, her head up in air, embodying the haughty mannerisms of an aristocrat. She preened in front of her, "I don't think that was quite it, I'm just?

Just what?" Grim thought about shoving her back into her shadow but threw away that idea. She'd throw it in her face later, and she needed help with the bandage. Who Hazel learned to stoop so low from, she had no idea, but she'd be sure to carefully manage who was influencing her. To be extorted by her own shadow was simply diabolical.

"You're... I'm glad to have you, okay? I don't know where I'd be without you," Grim admitted. Hazel didn't say anything; she just hovered beside her, basking in the moment. Once she had soaked up all the ambient vibes and Grim was suitably humiliated, she spoke, "You're such a narcissist. Now give me your arm."

"What did I do to deserve this," Grim looked upwards and mumbled to herself. Hazel grabbed her arm and started undoing the bandages, "You almost melted your brain! Without me! You're lucky I'm so nice."

"I thought we were already over that," Grim grumbled.

"Well, we were, and then I remembered again, so there. Besides, if you die, I die for real, and there's still so much I want to do." Grim tilted her head, she hadn't considered that Hazel might have her own goals. She wasn't sure if she was a dick or not for not asking before. The ethics of how much autonomy her Boon should have was really not something she wanted to get into this morning.

"I didn't exactly plan for that, how was I supposed to know?"

"That's not the point, you should've waited for me," Hazel said, the bandage forgotten.

"I can't wait for you for everything, there's stuff I do have to do on my own." Hazel frowned, "Not anymore. I don't know if you noticed, but I am your shadow. You will never be alone again." Grim stiffened despite herself, something about those words shook her a little. She'd thought about that before but had never quite internalized that. Her whole life had been planned upon being alone, not necessarily by choice. She wasn't so arrogant to assume she was worth anyone actually caring for her.

The fact her only friend was a carbon copy of herself was pathetic but maybe she'd take that? It's not like she had a wealth of options. It was almost easier when she hadn't come along. She'd gotten used to being lonely, but now that feeling had been replaced with a steady drum of anxiety. How many more people would she have to kill to protect her? To keep Hazel hers. In the future she'd probably have to kill more and what if one day Hazel didn't… like her any more? With who or what'd she'd become.

If the worst happened and she wanted to leave, she wouldn't force her to stay but she wasn't sure if she could survive being alone again. It wasn't fair how she wormed herself into her life and became her friend. This book is hosted on another platform. Read the official version and support the author's work. It made her hate her a little, for how much she cared.

"I never asked for you, you know?" Grim said in a low voice as she looked down, not making eye contact.

"My life would have been easier without you." Hazel scoffed, "Yeah? And where would you be now? You would have had nothing after Cede and you'd be no closer to figuring out that letter." Grim hissed in frustration, "It's not about that."

"Then what? We're stuck together," Hazel paused, her own face twisting in a way she'd never seen it before.

"Unless you want to get rid of me. You could, you know how." She wasn't wrong, she could use [CEDE] and give her to someone else. Not that she would, she didn't even give that a second thought. She was hers and she wasn't going to give that up.

"Stop," Grim said. Hazel did. Grim bit the side of her lip, chewing on her words, "You just insist on saying I'm never going to be alone, but then you keep dying. And you look just like me, which is another different kind of horrible. I'm not stupid; I know you do it to save me, but then we're stuck in that fucking tree, and I can't move for hours. I have to hold you as I feel you dying."

"Oh, I didn't even realize," Hazel said as her face softened. She sat down beside her.

"I don't know what else I could've done, I'm not real, you don't have to feel bad for me."

"What do you mean by that? Not real? You go back in my shadow when you die, but your fucking blood stays. I haven't thrown out my clothes yet, I haven't even touched them, they're covered in it. What are you?" Hazel froze, and for a moment she looked so sad. Her body locked up and she stared at something off in the distance, concentrating on it. She set her jaw as it looked like she made up her mind, "I am your..."

Her body contorted in on itself, her elbows jammed into her ribs as her shoulders bent inwards, "I am your—" She was forced to stop as she gasped for breath. It looked like a marionette was pulling her strings and slowly exerting pressure on her.

"I am your— shadow," Hazel said. The pressure released her after that and she didn't look to be in any more pain. Her mouth was raised, and her shoulder scrunched like she was so frustrated she could cry. Grim knew because she'd seen it on herself.

"I'm your shadow, Grim. I'm here for you, and I'm sorry." Before Grim could reply, Hazel undid the last fastening on Grim's bandage, letting it drop to the floor.

"Woah," Grim said as she looked at her arm. It was healed. The scars remained, but the cuts she'd gotten from the monkeylike creatures and from when she'd torn off her skin were covered by the haze. It filled in the gauges and looked like her skin. Upon closer inspection, she could tell it was shadow, but she flexed her fingers, and it didn't hurt anymore. So whatever it did made her body think it wasn't hurt anymore.

"This is the upgrade?" Grim said.

"I don't feel any pain." Hazel half smiled, "I don't think it's true healing. If I had to guess, it's just speeding it up, like how fast I can heal. You're still hurt underneath, but as of right now, it's just mimicking you. If you got hurt again, I think the haze would break."

"That's still amazing," Grim said.

"Imagine how much harder we could train? I wouldn't have to worry so much about getting hurt if you can heal me. Could you use it on others?" Medical Boons were worth a lot of money. She'd have to survive the Witching first, but it might even be enough to fast-track her into a Coven. She could even go to medical school if she wanted; it would be enough to get automatic entry.

"I think it would, but there's only one small problem."

"What's the problem?"

"That took a lot out of me. I don't know if I could do that again any time soon. Plus I feel it would be even harder for me to do it to others." She had to admit she'd gotten a little ahead of herself, but she'd work with whatever they had. It was still amazing.

"Why's that?" Grim asked. Hazel put her arm beside Grim's, "Because it's your shadow. It wanted to come back to you. I only made sure it went where it needed to go. There's also one more thing." Their link activated, and Hazel went back into her shadow. You only have so much of it to go around. Grim looked behind her, and it was true: Her shadow was noticeably less than it was before. She'd only be able to put out so much healing before she ran out of shadow.

Hazel must have literally been spreading herself thin before. Hazel stepped out of her shadow again.

"So there's some bad, but I think it's still really good and now we can both cheat." Grim frowned, trying to choose her words carefully, "You said before, there was stuff you still wanted to do. What... What do you want to do Hazel?" Hazel didn't hesitate, "I want to call you by your real name, I want to help you find out what happened to your family, I want to see you grow old and be happy. I want us to be Witches together." Grim laughed, she couldn't help herself. That was such a Hazel answer.

"What? What did I say?" Hazel whined.

"Nothing, I just wasn't expecting that. I thought you were gonna say the Embertones or something." Her face scrunched up, "That place? Too rich for my tastes, and I don't think I'd do well flying."

"You've been in a hover before."

"That's different," Hazel said.

"Don't worry about me, alright?" Grim nodded, "Just think about it, okay?" There was a knocking at the door, "Who are you talking to in there?"