Chương 29: Escalation

I looked up from my notes and turned to face Ella with a bright smile.

"Ella! You should've told me you were coming. I would've dressed up." For some reason she just kept coming back. The other Slytherin leaders had all backed off directly interacting with me after Fawley's failed ambush. Cassian was still in her orbit; so she had to have known the full truth of what went down. Yet here she was. Should I be impressed by her perseverance or annoyed at the constant low-level harassment? The other Slytherin girls had all adopted the 'spread rumors' approach. I didn't mind much.

In a way, having a reputation for being 'made of ice' was welcome, as most people stayed away from me as a result. Maybe Kilburn was getting some reflected respect for having the nerve to be more direct?

"What happened to all your friends? Did they abandon you like your parents?" She didn't quite manage to say it cruelly. It was more like she was trying to test insults to see how they affected me. She'd been doing much the same tactic for a while now. Prodding for weaknesses, but keeping social risk to herself low; a subtle hint implying she expected me to win verbal spars. Did she know she was doing it, or was it subconscious?

"One of them just arrived! How was your day Kitten?" I asked cheerily.

"Also, pretty sure my parents were murdered by the Shit Eaters—or whatever those idiots were called—so try not to share their fate, will you?"

"I'm not your friend, you smelly stray. I'm just here to study. Unlike some people, I know how to grow and cultivate all manner of things. It has nothing to do with you." A dig at Herbology being my worst subject? Shame I don't actually care about my performance in there.

"Yet here you are, coming to spend time with me when you have the whole rest of the library. Better yet, you care enough to clarify—the lady doth protest too much." I nodded seriously.

"And sorry for the smell, I just came from potions; I think Snape forgot about soap in addition to shampoo."

"Are you sure you should be talking that way about a teacher?"

"What's he going to do about it? Take more points from Ravenclaw to showcase how biased he is?" I shook my head.

"The other teachers won't let him hand out detentions without substantial proof beyond the word of a single one of his own students." I learned that last bit from Penelope. She was an endless font of information. Admittedly, most of that information was useless—and her inability to let a silence sit was irritating to no end—but she did have the occasional useful tidbit.

"You should have more respect."

"Some people should do more to earn it." I may have glanced her up and down as I said that. She scowled. If she was attempting intimidation, it failed horribly. If anything, it made her look like the puppy.

"Why are you wearing your hat indoors?" she tried.

"It looks ridiculous, way too big for a midget like you." Back to the height jokes? I thought she realized I actually like being short. Wizards didn't need physicality, and the social advantages of looking more harmless were amazing. I reached up and touched my hat.

"Tell that to Dumbledore and McGonagall. I haven't seen them take theirs off all year long. You should wear yours! Then we would match! We'd be so cute together." I all but squealed the last part, and brought my hands to below my chin, lightly touching my cheeks like I'd seen particularly young girls do when excited. The insults a person levels at another can often reveal the speaker's values. Not always—people could never be so easily encompassed by a single measure—but she was still a child.

The level of introspection for moving past one's own viewpoint tended to develop over time. Because of that, I knew she was jealous of my looks. After that first failed attempt in Transfiguration, my looks were the main thing she tried to target. She was a relatively plain-looking brunette girl with a prominent chin, and she folded a bit too fast when I started complimenting her features and comparing us in return. I'd been teasing her with poses ever since.

"They get to wear their hats. They've earned it," she said.

"Aww, don't be like that, you'll earn yours in time. If you wear one with me, I'm sure you'll feel more confident."

"I have better things to do than try to match with a child who still plays with her stuffed animals. Vicky, was it?" Ahh, her 'trump card' for this attempt? Knew this was coming ever since Luna had told Colin. Not much of a secret if a boy in another house knew about it by the second week of school.

"You know about Vicky!" I gasped with excess excitement.

"Does that mean you have your own plushie? We should bring them together! OH, let's make it a tea party! You'll love the tea I can make. It's amazing. I swear." She had gotten better at not overreacting to my teasing, but she was getting close to her limit. I could see it in the red tinge to her ears.

"You're as Loony as that idiot you always hang out with." …And she ruined it.

"Now, now." I said calmly, lowering my arms, smoothing my expression, and speaking with no inflection at all.

"Calling yourself an idiot may be accurate considering your performance in Charms, but I think we need to set some boundaries." A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation. The thing about scouting for weaknesses was that it could be very effective. I knew myself well enough to understand where she could cause the most damage. Which also meant I knew where to draw the line. She blinked, unbalanced by my complete change in tone and body language.

It was the first time I had openly insulted her. I knew she saw through my ditsy persona. Even if Cassian hadn't told her about Yarrow, it was hard not to notice I only ever acted like this when speaking directly to her. Still, she did have issues with sudden changes in social situations.

"Keep coming at me all you want. I don't care. Try to get a rise out of me by attacking my friends, and I will respond disproportionately."

"What?"

"Your mother owns a shop in Hogsmeade. Wonderful woman, doesn't ask questions when a student comes to her outside of regular visiting weekends. She also has quite the dangerous method for acquiring materials for her work. She wouldn't be the first person to go missing in the Forbidden Forest."

"Are you threatening my mother!?" she said with a mix of disbelief and horror.

"No, of course not." I said flatly, while staring directly into her eyes.

"I'm a first-year Hogwarts student. What could I possibly do to a full-fledged adult witch?"

"Then why bring her up?" she said. Heated. Unbalanced. To put you on the defense. She was smart and introspective enough that she'd probably realize that later, but for now, she'd lose conversational momentum.

"It's called reciprocity; you brought up my family and friends, I'll bring up yours. Not to mention it helps point out that I've done my research. If you want this to escalate, I won't hold back. I'll attack your insecurities far more effectively than you've been trying. I'll curse your books. Mix a hair removal potion into your shampoo. I'll make your life at this school hell."

"How would you even do that? You don't even know where the Slytherin dorms are."

"You weren't listening. I've done my research. Your common room is under the lake. Entrance in the dungeons. Current password is 'Dignity'." Thank you Fred and George.

"If you want we can even start flinging spells at each other, but if you decide to go that route, I would note again how you're struggling in Charms."

"You wouldn't. You'd ruin your grades and ruin your house's chance at the cup."

"Ahh, but we already established that Snape is too biased for the cup to matter, either the Headmaster steps in like last year and gives it to another house, or Slytherin wins. Why should I care about a prize my house is never going to earn in the first place?

"As for grades? They're just another form of currency. All that really matters is the results of learning. I already have a way back into the castle, and—more importantly—the library, should I be expelled." Not that I thought expulsion was likely after what people like the twins or the Marauders got away with on a regular basis. Also, I hadn't technically secured a way in yet either. I should probably steal the vanishing cabinet before Peeves breaks it.

Then all I have to do is purchase the other one in Borgin and Burkes. I'll do it next weekend. I decided. Just keep levitating it down empty corridors and up stairs until I reach the seventh floor and store it in my Study. Act innocent or lost if someone catches me at it. Good practice, and no need to rush.

"I'm both willing, and capable, of going far further than you, Kilburn. So if you push, you lose.

"Now why don't you just return to insulting my height, or insinuating that I'm too immature; I could use the pick-me-up. Or, you could just tell me what it is you actually want out of–" I waved my hand back and forth between us.

"This. I might even help you get it, if it isn't too onerous." Carrot and the stick. Always best to use both. A cornered rat will bite a cat. Better yet, the out I gave her was one of revealing more about herself and her motivations. If she was smart enough to accept my offer, I could use that information for my benefit the next time she started this shit. She was quiet for a long time. Standing there long enough that I pointedly went back to my Divination notes. I didn't have the time to waste on staring her down.

When she eventually moved, I tensed slightly. She walked over to my side and took a seat next to me.

"I have heard you struggle with Herbology," she said, with just as much tension as I was feeling.

"I am willing to help someone so obviously deficient." She reached into her bag and pulled out her Charms book, along with the subject's current homework, barely started. Our eyes met. I nodded. It could be an attempt at academic sabotage; I did just threaten her after all. That'd be an annoying escalation, but a manageable one. I had taken to writing rough drafts of my homework before rewriting it in calligraphic script—at least for the important subjects like Potions, Charms, and Transfiguration.

If she just tore up my paper I'd have plenty of time to rewrite it, then I'd be free of our verbal spars and could escalate in turn without guilt. If she was sincere, then the trade was pretty even. Assuming of course she actually was good at Herbology. A fair bet, given her mother's career. She didn't attack immediately, and we settled into an awkward study session. Nothing in her work stood out to me as an obvious trap. Was she playing the long game?

Turn in an assignment too similar to mine and claim I copied from her? Lure me into a false sense of security, then implement the sabotage when I'm less on guard?

"My father was killed when I was a baby," she said after a while. I paused my work and gave her my attention. She said the words evenly—a planned statement—not something she just blurted out.

"I only ever heard stories about him from my mother."

"I see. If it means anything to you, I'm sorry for your loss." Trying to gain sympathy from me to regain lost ground? Interesting tactic, but I'm an orphan. My tragic backstory beats hers. Might as well play along for now.

"What was it like– with your mother I mean?"

"We moved around a lot when I was younger. Never staying in a place for long in case the ones who killed him came for us. We were alone. Just the two of us." She fell silent and I nodded. My turn.

"I never really had anyone. There was always a gap between me and the other children." Magic for old Lyra, and my own actions and personality in the other world. I'd been disproportionately good at math. When others were beginning to learn Algebra, I had skipped grades for the subject and was learning Calculus. My pride at the accomplishment and lack of care for anything social didn't help endear me to my classmates. Not the older ones in math, nor the ones my own age in all my other subjects.

"There's someone who is almost like a mother. Sometimes I could see a reflection of what it would be like, but it was never the same. Never the unconditional stuff written about." Again, fully the truth. Ms Parish and my past-life's mother. There were times where it looked like they truly cared, times I could almost imagine we were a family in truth. But mother had a wealth of examples to burn that image, and Ms Parish– I just didn't know her well enough for long enough.

Adults in the real world were a constant disappointment. Sharing information about myself with Ella could be dangerous, but the vague facts helped disguise my greater secrets. Besides, even when being deceitful, it was always better to stick to facts; less chance of being caught out and losing credibility. Time to nail the point home.

"It's why I care so much for my friends. I'm not going to sit by and let something happen to them. Even if it's just name-calling. Understand?" She scribbled a new line into her homework. I looked at it with hidden amusement.

"That is understandable," she said.

"If you care for something, it's only proper to defend it, or them, from any perceived threat, no matter how small." I looked over at her, and our eyes met.

"I love my mother. If she goes 'missing' while out in the forest, I'll kill you… Puppy." Ahh …

"Well, Kitten, I can see you have claws." I reached out and pointed to the section she just wrote.

"But you got this part wrong." She flushed red and immediately started scratching it out.