Chương 64: Chapter 65: Around the campfire

We make camp just outside the dungeon. It sets up quickly with the five of us. There are two tents now, and by the time I'm done building and lighting the fire, the rest of the area is cleared out and the tents are set up and good to go. It's a little early for sleep, and none of us need more than four or five hours of sleep, except maybe El. She likes to sleep. And Vincent, who doesn't like to get up or take part in the watches. But Ash stays up with me for the first watch while Gigi takes one of her cat naps.

"It's so weird," Ash says as they all bed down for the night.

"I'm a demon." She holds up her hands, displaying the fingernails that might be better described as claws.

"Like, I was never very religious, so I don't care about it on that side of things. But it's weird."

"I know what you mean," I say.

"I get weird every time I realize I'm thinking like a wolf. And my sense of smell is probably my sharpest sense now."

"Oh, that must be strange," she says.

"I have a red tinge around everything, like my vision is based on heat as much as much anything else. I've learned to pretty much ignore it. Hard to ignore all the scents, though, right?"

"It's not something I want to ignore," I tell her.

"I really like the information my nose gives me. It's incredible. And it's gotten my alertness and tracking to shoot up. You notice any difference to your skills?"

"Not to my skills, no. But I take less damage from fire than I used to. So does Vincent. Not quite immune, but definitely less worried about fire."

"I wish I had something like that."

"I think it's strange that none of us decided to stay human," she says.

"And also that none of us went all out in becoming another species."

"What do you mean?"

"We're all bloodlines. We're not elves or dwarves or gnomes or whatever. We're like halfway creatures. We kept our humanity even as we turned away from it."

"I hadn't considered that." She nods.

"Tell me more about this dragon," she says.

"Do you really think he would keep leveling and killing us?"

"You seem interested in the idea."

"I like power," she says.

"Personal power, I mean. I like being strong and tough and all that. I really like being able to rely on myself. And I feel like I could do that more if I went through this cycle of death a few times. I mean, we have close to the same number of stat points, but I'm four levels higher than you. And while we're close, I think you have more than I do. You're more balanced than I am, I know that."

"So you want to go through it a few times."

"Only when I have the quests ready to turn in, so I can jump up really fast," she says.

"But yeah. Did you put all your equipment in your spatial bag when you died the second time?"

"Yeah. That's the trick to it."

"I wonder if I should do it. Like, as soon as we get back to Elmspire."

"Assuming they let you in," I say. She scoffs.

"You saw that, huh?" She scratches under one of her horns.

"I mean, I kind of get it. They look at me, and they see something dangerous. I'd want to keep eyes on me too."

"It's discrimination."

"Oh, totally. And it's profiling. They aren't watching Vincent that close. But he passes way better than I do. I'm obviously demon blooded."

"Why did you choose the one that was so obviously demon blooded? Didn't you see what you would've looked like?"

"I saw," she says.

"But I didn't think it mattered. I mean, I knew I was going to end up in a place where there were others of my kind. So I didn't think I'd stick out much. Plus, I like the horns, holding tight to my skull like this. They look better, almost like I'm wearing a tiara. And I don't care what color my skin is."

"Ebony is a good color on you," I say. She smiles at me, and I can see her shark teeth.

"Thanks," she says.

"I chose this one because it had the best perks for my class. And it worked out well. We spawned in, and there was nothing unusual about me. I looked like most of the people that surrounded us. Vincent was the one who stood out."

"Because he took the more magically blooded demon?"

"Yeah. His didn't come with bonuses to his strength. He just got bonuses to presence." Which makes sense; presence is where MP comes from. Makes sense that he'd want the one that provided more mana for him to cast spells with.

"How long did you guys spend in – what was your town called?"

"Marketplace," she says.

"Not very cleverly named, but the town was apparently originally a giant bazaar that just grew up into a town."

"I guess it doesn't have to have a clever name," I say.

"Most cities and stuff don't. They just get different names in different languages over time. Isn't there a hill in England that is basically called Hill Hill Hill Hill, just in different languages?" She laughs at that.

"Anyway, Marketplace had a bunch of quests. They had a ton of guilds, so it was easy to get quests that we qualified for."

"Were there all that many other players?" I ask.

"You know, people from our world?"

"Yeah," she says.

"We made up something like ten percent of the population, between the humans and the demon blooded."

"People came through and decided to stay human? That's weird."

"That's what I thought," Ash says with a smile. This time, she doesn't show her teeth. I think she's a bit ashamed of them. I can understand why. They aren't janky or anything; they're just sharp. They fit together well, but she looks like a cartoon villain when she smiles. But her jawline is just as strong as it ever was, with the same graceful curve and same heroic little dimple in her chin.

"Ten percent, though? I think they're only about three percent in Elmspire."

"Yeah, I think Elmspire is a lot bigger than Marketplace. How many people live there?"

"I'd be surprised if there were fewer than fifty thousand," I say. Though that would mean that the players made up about four percent of the population.

"Marketplace was only about twenty thousand." So the same basic number in both places.

"And were the players putting together their own guilds?" She nods.

"They didn't call them guilds. They were consortiums, or cabals, or really anything that they could call them except guilds. But they're the same thing. A group of players trying to get further together than they could on their own." If you stumble upon this tale on Amazon, it's taken without the author's consent. Report it.

"I don't know why we're so opposed to that idea," I say, poking at the fire.

"I think it's because no one else went through what we went through," she says, smiling again as the fire light increases, reflecting off her ebony skin.

"No one else experienced what a world with a dead god was like."

"But if this god slayer keeps going, they probably will soon."

"I like this world," Ash says.

"Even with the prejudice at the gate of Elmspire, this world has a lot less prejudice and racism than our old world. People get along better, and there's more of a vibe of peace between the peoples."

"That's because there are monsters outside of the cities," I say.

"Whatever the reason," she says.

"I like this world. I want to protect it."

"Even if that means dying a few times?"

"Even if it means dying a hundred times," she says.

"And it's not entirely altruistic of me, either. We'd get more powerful, personally, than any other players around us. We'd be stronger and tougher than anyone else at our level, or even at levels beyond us. We could do whatever we want. People would have to leave us alone, because we'd be too dangerous to cross."

"Just so long as you're not thinking about conquering anything and being in charge," I say. She shakes her head and waves away the thought.

"I don't want to be in charge of anything," she says.

"Well, nothing other than my own life. The thing I love most about this world is the freedom. I get to do what I want to do. Not what my bosses tell me to do, not what society tells me to do, not what television or movies tell me what to do. I get to do what I want. And that's pretty incredible, when you think about it."

"And you're willing to sacrifice yourself to the whims of a dragon for a while to make sure that you can do that?"

"How is that different from every job you've ever had?" she asks me.

"You go to work and you suffer through all the annoying shit that you have to do. But you get to do some cool projects, hopefully. And you get paid. If you're really lucky, you get paid enough to be able to do what you want. I'm willing to work for a dragon for a while if it means that I can then do what I want."

"I don't think the others agree with you."

"Then they don't have to come," she says.

"They can go and adventure the hard way while we get all the levels we need to die and come back again stronger than before. If they don't want to come with us, they don't have to." I'm not entirely convinced that I want to do it. But I don't say that.

"I just want to hit level thirty before it becomes an issue."

"Is that why you aren't trying the potions yet?"

"What?"

"You said you were going to try the potions after the dungeon, once you'd completed that quest. But you didn't. Did you forget, or are you holding out until we level you up a bit more?"

"I think I'm holding out to level a bit more. Thirty is one of the threshold levels, and I really want another talent."

"What are you going to take?"

"Probably toughness, honestly," I say.

"I have a lot of hit points, and I'm going to keep getting more, but the doubling is ridiculous. El almost has six thousand hit points. That's as many as a dire bear. I look at you guys, and my eighteen hundred just looks paltry in comparison."

"Toughness is a great talent," she says.

"Especially good if you're going to be surviving on your own for a while. Which seems fitting for your class, right? And your bloodline. I mean, do you feel like a lone wolf?" I think back to the number of times I've considered the four of them to be my group, my pack. I shake my head.

"I'm definitely a pack animal," I say.

"I consider you guys my pack."

"Humans are pack animals too," she points out.

"I like that you think of us as pack."

"Like family," I agree.

"We've been together through a lot." She nods, smiling at me without baring her teeth.

"Yes we have," she says. She blushes, a little tinge of red coming to the obsidian black skin around her glowing red eyes.

"That's why I want to do this with you."

"You mean the leveling and dying thing? The stats hack?" She hesitates, but then she nods. I notice that she's a lot closer to me than she was just a moment ago. All she did was turn, but it's like we're occupying the same space now, where before we were just sitting next to each other.

"We don't even know if the god slayer is still around," I say.

"Or how powerful she is." She smiles when I refer to the god slayer with feminine pronouns. I've noticed that I usually try to use neutral pronouns for them, but that Vincent uses male pronouns when describing the god slayer.

"We don't know that she wants anything bad at all," Ash agrees with me.

"But we know that she's out there. And she might need someone who can stand up to her. Or a group of someones."

"I'm surprised you're willing to give up thirty two levels." I say. It feels like we're breathing the same air, and it's kind of intoxicating.

"I can earn them again," she says, her voice dropped down to a whisper. There's a tingle that goes down my spine, waiting there at the base of it. The tingle moves around to the front, and I feel myself twitch a little bit. I suddenly realize how close we are to one another. I can see the curve of her lips. They're parted, and I can see the red of her mouth inside. Why are her lips parted? Why is her head tilted? It would be so easy just to kiss her right now.

I could lean forward just a tiny bit, and our lips would press together. Is that what she wants? Is this the result of my charisma being so high? For some reason, that thought is like a cold shower, and I find myself moving away. I know the stats I have are who I am, but it feels wrong. I took those points in charisma with the hopes of being able to convince a dragon not to kill me. I didn't take them to become more attractive to my friends.

I didn't take them so that the three girls that I actually know would all want to kiss me. And it feels wrong. It feels like I'd be taking advantage of them, like I'm using something that takes consent away from them, even if they feel like they're consenting. I can't do it. Maybe someday, I'll feel like this higher charisma is actually part of me, and not just something I bought with my stat points so that I'd be able to talk to a dragon more convincingly. But today is not that day.

I clear my throat and pull away from her, looking out into the woods.

"Do you think we can get enough skill, spell, and ability points to make it worth dying and getting back the stat points?" I ask.

"I don't know," she says.

"If it's just the two of us, then maybe we can go back and forth. One of us gets the levels and dies, the other one trains. Then, when the first one comes back from the dead, we switch. That could be useful. Better if there were more than the two of us, though."

"Do you think we'll be able to convince the others?" I ask. I'm still not entirely convinced myself, but I can see the benefits of it. I know the benefits first hand.

"Maybe Gigi," Ash says.

"El loves to fight, but I don't think she'll be okay with dying over and over again. She'll probably insist that she can get stat points the old fashioned way. I know she gets vitality faster with her class. But not Vincent. He doesn't seem to care about anything other than his spells."

"He's got a lot of them, though," I say. I think back to the fireball.

"And they're pretty damned powerful."

"Yeah. But he could get so much more if he went through death a few times."

"It's hard to conceptualize," I say.

"I mean, it still feels like you're dying. I don't blame anyone for wanting to avoid that sensation."

"Does it really feel like death? Does it hurt?" I think back to the two times I died.

"It depends," I say.

"If the death is swift enough, you don't have time to really register it. But if it happens in battle, then yeah, it really sucks."

"But the dragon kills you quickly?"

"I think El could handle one strike from the dragon," I say.

"But I doubt even she could take two."

"But that's without armor or anything, right?"

"Yeah. And it's not trying to dodge. So it's without any defense. What is your defense, by the way?"

"267," she says.

"My armor is really badass." Yeah, it would have to be.

"Wow," I say.

"Mine is only 145. You have almost double my defense."

"And I have more than double your hit points," she points out.

"That doesn't mean anything. I watched you fight when we were in the dungeon. You're really fast."

"Yeah, I have a few things that boost my fighting speed. Not that it really helped against the minotaurs."

"You did fine," she assures me. She puts her hands in her lap, wringing them over one another a bit. Then she slaps her knees and pushes herself to her feet.

"How much longer are you going to stay up for watch?" she asks. It's only been about an hour.

"Usually I watch for two hours," I say.

"But it's a question of who is going to take the next watch. If it's Gigi, she can handle the two hour naps no problem. I don't really want to wake up Vincent or El."

"Yeah, let them sleep."

"I don't know where to sleep, though," I say.

"What do you mean?" she asks.

"Sleep in a tent."

"The tents are for two people," I say.

"And currently they're full. If I wake up Gigi, you take her spot. But if I don't wake up anyone else, whose spot do I take?"

"Oh," she says. Then she shrugs.

"Why don't you just sleep with me? We can share a bed roll."

"I'm not sure that's a good idea," I say. She waves me away.

"It's no big deal," she says.

"We'll be fully clothed, though I'll take my armor off. Nothing untoward. We'll just share the bedroll. I'm really warm and good to snuggle up with."

"Isn't that going to make things weird, us sleeping together?" She laughs at me.

"You're such a prude," she says.

"It's just sleep. I'm not going to fuck you or anything." I consider it for a few minutes. What's the harm, really? I mean, we'd just be two friends piled together. Snuggling, yes. But nothing sexual. At least, I don't expect there to be anything sexual. We're like family. We're pack. There's nothing wrong with snuggling up with pack.

"Yeah," I say.

"Okay. Let's try that." She gives me a smile that's as much a smirk as anything else.

"Good," she says.

"I hate sleeping alone."