Chương 192: B2 Chapter 191: The Pump’s Not Dead

Aurelia looked like garbage. Meno needed a second to reconcile that with the version of her he had in his head. Normally she wore enough jewelry to count as a Hoarder. Today she had zero accessories, uncombed blond hair, sunken eyes, no makeup, pajama pants, bare feet, flip-flops, and one of Meno's merch shirts with the Mythic-tier Furnon print across the front. Aurelia had min-maxed herself all the way down to Common I.

Something had been off for a while, but whatever debuff she was running now seemed immune to dispel.

"Hey," Meno said.

"You are definitely not okay."

"I changed my mind," Thorn said.

"You can't be in the music video."

"Hey guys! I am so sorry to be a disappointment. Did you want me all dolled up? Ahhh, it's too bad."

"Actually, I didn't want you to come at all, but that is beside the point now," Meno said.

"So where is your hot girlfriend, Meno?" Aurelia asked.

"Is she not coming? Too busy getting railed?"

"Hey, watch it," Thorn said. Great. Aurelia was speedrunning a midlife crisis at twenty-five. Meno had no idea how his stream meltdown had produced this version of her. Carl getting exposed might have finally hit home, or watching her father run into an actual limit had cracked something she had always treated as permanent. Then again, maybe Aurelia had simply spent too much time admiring massive Heavy Striker numbers before discovering the build had no DPS. Meno couldn't solve her today.

"Okay, so are we going?" Aurelia asked.

"I got us a contact in the Culture Department who can make the music video happen. We have to tag Vernova in the upload and give them a shoutout saying this is the most, and I mean most, beautiful city in the world. All tourists should visit."

"It is a pretty nice city," Thorn said.

"Skyline smells like burnt wiring. I can actually go outside here without a mask."

"You actually wear a mask in Skyline?" Meno asked.

"I have never been on the ground level. Is it really that bad?"

"Yes," Aurelia said.

"Only poor people go outside in Skyline on foot." Thorn nodded despite still looking annoyed with her. Any Common I impression Aurelia's outfit had created lasted until they stepped outside and found a red sports car crouched against the curb, all narrow glass, wing doors, and exactly two seats. Her bodyguard was missing too. Meno noticed, filed that problem for later, and refused to let it spawn another quest.

"Didn't you have a bigger car? How are we going to fit into this?" Meno asked.

"I reserved the trunk for you, babe."

"Did you just say babe?" Meno asked.

"I have enough on my plate right now. I don't need your bullshit aggro."

"I also have a lot on my plate, most of which you vomited on without thinking about anyone else. So how about that? Are you going to keep crying?" Meno was not getting baited into this. Rina first; zombie-mode Aurelia could sit in the queue until later.

"PBG, let's just go on foot," Thorn said.

"This harpy can follow us in her toy car."

"All good," Meno said.

"I don't mind. Keep talking trash if it makes you feel better, as long as you help us shoot that music video. Free pass." Meno opened the trunk. Spacious was not the word. There was barely enough room for him and a random leather boot with no matching pair, so he picked up the boot, tossed it onto the street, and folded himself into the remaining space. City Hall was only a few minutes away, and having the car nearby would still be useful if they needed to bounce fast.

Aurelia left the boot where it landed, smiled down at him, and closed the trunk. The next five minutes were a permanent crowd-control effect Meno had no desire to experience twice. When the car finally stopped, Thorn opened the trunk and helped him out. A middle-aged woman in glasses and a dark formal coat was already waiting beside the curb. Meno recognized her immediately as the same government investigator who had helped kidnap him.

Naturally, he waved, then halfway through converted the gesture into one raised finger without losing the smile. She did not react, which was disappointing but professional. Thorn leaned closer.

"I think I hate Aurelia."

"Can you focus on why we are doing this?" Meno asked.

"Treat her like you would anyone in your guild, if it still even exists."

"What is that supposed to mean? Stormhold rising!"

"Yeah, it's floating into the sky as we speak," Meno said.

"Shut up. Stormhold is Stormhold even if I end up being the only member."

"You guys done?" Aurelia asked.

"You think I haven't heard that? Very smooth." The investigator led them into City Hall without speaking. The place had committed hard to an ancient vibe: white marble, two huge columns at the entrance, and enough stairs to make reaching the front door count as light cardio. The mayor definitely had an underground parking elevator. Meno had been here once during an elementary school tour and remembered almost none of it. He did remember borrowing a statue from a desk, though.

It showed a man holding a massive globe over his shoulders and looked cool, which had been enough. His parents had refused to buy him the newest Big Blast Man figure around the same time. The statue was still somewhere in the boxes sent to his sister. They crossed the marble atrium through tourists and city workers, with the crowd thinning as they went deeper, until the investigator stopped at an elevator. Meno expected them to finally head underground, but the elevator started climbing. Side quest.

The Culture Department was on the fourth floor and looked like a jungle. Tall potted plants crowded the hallway, broad leaves leaned over the benches, and climbing vines ran across frames mounted along the walls. The investigator stopped outside a pair of heavy wooden doors, disappeared through them for two minutes, then came back and waved the group inside before leaving without another word. A man in a white suit waited behind an oversized desk.

He hurried around it, attacked everyone with enthusiastic handshakes, then introduced himself as Boleno Furson, Deputy Head of Culture and Tourism.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Furson," Aurelia said.

"Meno here, also known as PrayerBeadGod, is well aware of the wishes of your office. Excuse my attire. It is merely a costume for the music video, designed to be as relatable as possible." Smooth. Meno had to give her that. The bullshit came out completely frictionless, and Boleno had zero resistance.

"Certainly! We are always glad to assist such high-profile citizens who are willing to promote our city for free. Although we usually plan our marketing events around spring to maximize visitors during the summer stretch, this special autumn occasion should work considering the circumstances and the cultural relevance of the moment." He gave them an awkward laugh.

"It's not like it gets cold around here much." Meno equipped his best fake smile and waited for the dialogue box to close. Boleno kept talking. Meno eventually found an opening.

"Hey! I brought a bunch of high-profile streamers into Vernova. I hope you guys appreciate it. The city is basically turning into the major streaming hub."

"Yes, yes! We are grateful for that. It will certainly have an outsized effect on our tourism revenue." Boleno grabbed a tablet and pushed it toward them.

"Now, could you sign here, here, and here?"

"Why do you need three separate forms?" Meno asked.

"Minor matter! One is for City Hall Security and Visitor Services, another for the Municipal Property and Access Management Office, and the last one is for me." That was dumb. They signed all three. Somehow Thorn had the best handwriting, which was unexpected considering his fingers looked like sausages. With the nonsense cleared, Boleno finally led them back toward the elevator, still talking about tourism statistics and seasonal visitor patterns.

Meno tuned him out while Boleno entered a code into the panel and sent them down. The trip took longer than going from the lobby to the fourth floor, although the display never showed an exact level. Meno hoped there was only one server section down there. Grandpa had never specified which machine his phone needed to approach, only that it had to get close enough.

"Once we are down at the servers, please do not touch anything," Boleno said.

"How long do you think this will take?" If you stumble upon this tale on Amazon, it's taken without the author's consent. Report it.

"About an hour," Meno said.

"Good, good. I haven't had lunch yet." The elevator opened into a plain service hallway. Boleno marched them through three security gates, feeding each one a palm and iris scan until the final door unlocked onto rows of tall black server cabinets. Thick cable bundles vanished into channels beneath the raised floor, and a wall switch brought the room up under hard white lights. This was it. Thorn slowly turned through the room, taking in all the hardware with visible appreciation.

Aurelia was less interested in the servers and kept checking Meno often enough that he noticed.

"Okay, guys, work on the song," Meno said.

"Thorn, get her up to speed. I'll scout some angles."

"Let's do this." Thorn faced Aurelia.

"I expect professionalism."

"You do? Naturally. Do you know how many music videos I shot in my life?"

"No. How many?" Thorn asked.

"Zero. Do you want me to turn around and shake it, or would you prefer to grab my waist?" Perfect. They could keep each other and Boleno distracted. Meno started moving between the racks with his phone raised as if he were framing shots. Underneath the camera screen, his thumb opened the cleaning app and called Grandpa. Boleno was still hovering close enough to hear him, so Meno kept the cover going when the connection opened.

"Ready to shoot. Good angles all around," Meno said. Hopefully Grandpa understood. Meno crouched beside one of the racks and angled his phone toward Thorn as though framing him for a shot. The camera stayed on-screen while the cleaning app ran underneath it, leaving Meno with nothing to do but wait. Thorn, unfortunately, had discovered art. He kept rewriting parts of the song while Aurelia called him stupid after every second idea.

Thorn looked increasingly ready to use one of the server racks for an overhead press, but he ignored most of the criticism and kept telling her to follow the performance. Twenty-one minutes later, Meno's legs were going numb from crouching beside the same cabinet. Grandpa had better be done. Thorn finally clapped his hands together and announced they were ready, while Boleno conveniently moved out of frame.

Meno stood, worked some feeling back into his legs, then switched fully to the camera and pointed it at himself.

"Maximum Pump: Veyrath on Fire." Meno swung the lens toward Thorn as the instrumental kicked in from Aurelia's phone. Thorn claimed the center aisle between the server racks, broad enough that the cabinets seemed to close in around him. The first beat hit, and so did his fist against his open palm.

"Log in heavy, armor tight. Stormhold shaking every night." Thorn advanced on the camera. Meno gave ground smoothly, keeping him centered.

"Boss comes down, I hold the line." Thorn stopped dead and squared his shoulders. Aurelia darted in behind him, planted both hands against his back, and leaned forward like she was helping him tank whatever invisible boss had just charged. Thorn stayed locked on the lens.

"Stack the weight and make it mine." His fist hit his chest. The other hand reached for the camera while Aurelia appeared over his shoulder, grinning directly into the shot. Meno kept retreating, and Thorn kept pressure on him.

"No retreat and no excuse. Every loss is muscle juice." Aurelia moved around his flank, grabbed his upper arm with both hands, and tried to get her fingers around it. Not even close. She stared at the failure for half a second, then stayed attached anyway.

"World goes dark, I still remain." Thorn spread his arms. Aurelia slipped beneath one and tucked herself against his side, flexing beside him with enough confidence to ignore the catastrophic stat difference.

"Turn the shutdown into gains." Thorn finished with both fists clenched at his sides. Aurelia matched the pose beside him, turning the end of the verse into a victory screen neither of them had earned. The anger made the verse work much better than it had any right to. Thorn was not acting pissed about Veyrath disappearing. He drove the line about the world going dark straight into the camera, then opened his arms on still remain like the shutdown had killed everyone except him and his chest.

Aurelia invaded the frame before her part even started. She slid one hand across Thorn's shoulder as she circled him, squeezed his upper arm on the way past, then planted herself between him and the camera as the pre-chorus came in.

"If the server dies, we lift," Aurelia sang. She mimed a curl with one arm while the other stayed hooked around Thorn's bicep.

"If the rankings freeze, we shift." Aurelia pointed past Meno toward the server racks, then shifted her weight sideways until Thorn had to move half a step just to remain visible behind her.

"No respawn, no second try." She turned one shoulder toward the lens and caught the bottom of the oversized Meno shirt between two fingers.

"Pump so hard we never die." Aurelia dragged the hem up just enough to make Thorn glance down, then dropped it before he could lose character. The pajama pants, flip-flops, and oversized merch shirt should have ruined the shot. Instead, she was so committed to behaving like this was a real music video that the outfit became part of the bit. Then the chorus hit. Thorn moved up beside her, and both of them attacked it.

"Maximum pump, maximum gain. Break the limit, break the chain." Thorn hammered both fists toward the floor on maximum pump and twisted into a side-chest pose for maximum gain. Aurelia immediately used his extended arm like stage equipment, ducking beneath it, turning once, then coming back up pressed against his shoulder.

"Chest on Monday, legs someday. If the crew pumps, I lead the way." On lead the way, Thorn pointed straight down the aisle. Aurelia stepped forward for her solo line, raised both arms overhead, and rolled one shoulder toward the camera.

"Veyrath burning, raise it higher." Thorn flexed directly behind her.

"Every rep feeds the fire." Aurelia glanced back, decided that was not enough, and backed into him until Thorn's chest became most of her background.

"World went down, but I remain," Thorn and Aurelia finished together. Aurelia threw one arm around his neck while Thorn hit another pose.

"Maximum pump, maximum gain." The chorus ended with Aurelia pointing at Thorn while he planted his feet, raised both arms, and locked into a front double-biceps pose. Meno had to admit it was annoyingly catchy. Thorn immediately started the second verse by advancing down the aisle again. Meno backed away with the camera, keeping him centered as rows of black server cabinets passed on either side.

"Stormhold gone, the crew dispersed. Still I put the pumping first." Thorn opened both hands toward the empty room on crew dispersed, then struck his chest hard enough on pumping first to make the impact audible.

"No more raids and no more queue. So I found another set to do." He grabbed an imaginary bar and started rowing it as he kept moving toward the camera. Then Thorn declared war on every tank build.

"Tank was weak, my chest was strong. Everybody built it wrong." He slapped both palms against his chest, then pointed straight at Meno through the camera on everybody built it wrong.

"Speed is nice, but size is law. Crit my shirt and watch it tear." Thorn flexed hard enough on the final line that the sleeve pulled tight across his arm. Meno gave the shirt maybe two more crits. Aurelia appeared behind Thorn before her part started. She planted one hand on his shoulder, leaned around him to inspect his chest like she was checking whether the tank had actually died, then dragged her fingers down his arm as she moved into frame.

"When the healer leaves, just flex," Aurelia said. Thorn flexed on command. She grabbed his bicep with both hands and leaned back like she was testing whether it could support her weight.

"When the tank dies, what comes next?" Aurelia released him, stepped in front, and let herself fall backward against his chest. Thorn caught her without breaking pose.

"When the patch notes kill your build," Aurelia continued, looking directly into the camera. She reached behind herself and slapped Thorn's chest twice.

"Add more plates, refuse to yield." Thorn responded to Aurelia's line by flexing on command. Aurelia shrugged at the camera like that settled it. Meno nearly lost the shot. She mimed reading patch notes in front of her, frowned at whatever imaginary nerf she found, then planted both hands against Thorn's thighs.

"When the patch notes kill your build," Aurelia said.

"Add more plates, refuse to yield." Two hard slaps landed on add more plates. Thorn accepted the upgrade without comment, then the chorus crashed back in.

"Maximum pump, maximum gain. Break the limit, break the chain." Thorn hammered both fists down, twisted into a side-chest pose, and gave Aurelia enough room to grab his forearm and swing around him. Thorn finally started cooperating with the choreography, catching her around the waist as she came through and turning her once before putting her back on her feet.

"Chest on Monday, legs someday. If the crew pumps, I lead the way." Aurelia laughed in the middle of the turn and still landed on beat.

"Veyrath burning, raise it higher." Thorn appeared directly behind her and flexed.

"Every rep feeds the fire." Aurelia backed into him until his chest occupied most of the background, and they finished the chorus from there.

"World went down, but I remain. Maximum pump, maximum gain." By the bridge, whatever limiter Aurelia normally had on camera was completely gone. She crowded the lens and flicked one wrist.

"No Divine Evolution." Thorn rose behind her into a full chest pose.

"Only massive constitution." Aurelia spun and pointed at him.

"No debuff can stop the grind." Thorn tapped his temple, then his torso.

"Body first and brain behind." Aurelia threw both hands toward the server cabinets.

"Stormhold fallen, servers dead."

"Still the pump lives in my head," Thorn answered, pointing both thumbs at his skull.

"AI ragequit, gods withdrew." Aurelia threw one arm toward the ceiling. Thorn stepped past her.

"Doesn't matter. One more two." They advanced together. Aurelia punched upward.

"ONE!" Thorn matched her.

"MORE!" Both surged straight at Meno.

"REP!" He pulled the phone back before they could crowd themselves out of frame.

"Pump the chest," Thorn called, pounding his fist against it. Aurelia slipped behind him and slapped between his shoulder blades.

"Pump the back." They crossed each other, pivoted, and converged again.

"Pump until the servers crack!" Boleno immediately checked the servers.

"Pump the arms," Thorn called, curling both.

"Skip the legs," Aurelia answered, pointing down.

"Those are tomorrow anyway!" Aurelia kicked off one flip-flop and sent it spinning at Thorn, who slipped his head aside and let it sail past without either of them missing the beat. Aurelia climbed onto the base of a server cabinet and raised both arms.

"Raise the bar." Thorn mimed loading a barbell across his shoulders beneath her.

"Raise the weight."

"If it hurts, accelerate!" Aurelia stepped down with one hand on Thorn's shoulder, then pointed over her own.

"Crew behind me."

"Fire ahead." Thorn punched toward the end of the aisle, then they both snapped toward the camera.

"Veyrath's gone." Thorn advanced alone. Veins stood along his neck.

"THE PUMP'S NOT DEAD!" That was not a lyric anymore. That was a warning. Boleno had stopped smiling, but the final chorus hit before he could reconsider the permit, and Aurelia jumped straight back into Thorn's space.

"Maximum pump, maximum gain. Break the limit, break the chain." Thorn hammered the rhythm with both fists while Aurelia circled him, rolled one shoulder into the lens, ducked beneath an arm, and came back against his side.

"Chest on Monday, legs someday. If the crew pumps, I lead the way." Aurelia pointed straight at Thorn's legs on legs someday. Thorn refused to acknowledge the attack as she moved to his left.

"Veyrath burning, raise it higher." Thorn answered from his right.

"Every rep feeds the fire." They closed shoulder to shoulder.

"World went down, but I remain. Maximum pump, maximum gain." Thorn planted his feet.

"MAXIMUM PUMP!"

"MAXIMUM GAIN!" Aurelia fired back. Thorn spread his arms.

"BREAK THE LIMIT!" Aurelia stabbed one finger at Meno's lens.

"BREAK THE CHAIN!" They came forward together.

"Veyrath fell and gods may run, but the crew still pumps as one." Thorn dragged in a huge breath.

"MAXIMUM—" Aurelia slammed herself against his side, one hand spread across his chest and the other pointed directly into the camera.

"PUMP!" The instrumental died. Thorn locked into a final flex hard enough to threaten the sleeve seam. Aurelia dropped low beside him with a grin, blond hair completely wrecked and one bare foot planted on the server-room floor. Meno lowered the phone. The Chain slander remained unforgivable, but neither Thorn nor Aurelia knew how to deal damage. The video itself? Cracked.

Meno opened Connect, attached the recording, tagged Vernova, Thorn, and Aurelia, and typed: try to break my chain QQ, AI couldn't do it RIP Maximum drama. Meno posted it, which handled the cover story. Now Grandpa just needed to have done his part. He pocketed the phone and turned toward the elevator. The music video had been good enough to get them into the room and convincing enough that nobody could call it fake afterward. None of that changed the actual problem. Rina was still missing.