Chương 2: [The Blue Traveler: A Glimpse of FabL Part II]One Who Understands Pain

Who would believe it? Even if I spoke of what I felt and what I saw, who would believe me? The "Great God" Itasevaris is dead. He vanished from the world without a trace. When the whole world mourns his absence, how could I say it? That he was outwardly a great "God," but in essence, a monster leading the world to ruin. I felt it. I knew it. That he was an existence of evil. But who could I tell? Who would have believed me?

Because he was a "God" who had brought blessings to people for thousands of years with his great power. Because I, who realized his true nature, was an existence equal to nothing compared to him. In the end, the truth is, he was defeated before he could fulfill his own ambition. Moreover, the one who defeated him was a seemingly ordinary traveling child. To say such a thing. Who would believe it? Only I know. That while almost no one knew, the world fell into crisis and was saved.

Because I was there at that time, and was saved by that person. Some time has passed since then. There are things I think about now. Living in just one world, perhaps the day will never come when I can understand the full picture of that incident. I will probably never truly understand the value of this world and myself being saved. Still, the great evil was surely defeated within some great flow. Defeated before the will of the person who stood against it. I feel like I understand just that.

Before a power too mighty, our human power is tiny. There is nothing we can do. Still, I didn't want to lose. But when my power fell far short, and I sincerely wished for help. That person appeared. Clad in a raiment of light shining in a pure blue, deep as the sea. As if a real god or savior. But that person was undeniably human. One who acted on behalf of my will. And we killed "God." Maybe it's not just me.

On behalf of us who have the will but no power, that person must have faced "hopeless things" head-on and continued to fight. In a body that looks seemingly no different from my current self, rather even suggesting innocence, harboring tremendous experiences beyond my reach. Even so, that person must have continued to walk without straying from the path of humanity. Otherwise. What on earth must be there? How can a person? While carrying such spectacular "pain."

While also possessing vivid and almost cruel severity towards enemies. Still remain human, stand by someone's side, and be kind? There is no god in this world. But I thought that person was truly a miraculous existence. That person is probably still fighting somewhere even now. Then I shall pray for that person. I shall pray for that "Blue Traveler" who possesses a power more severe and gentle than anything in this world. For the safety of the journey.

And hopefully, that he saves as many humans like me as possible. —From the memoir of a certain woman on Planet Doltria I thought I was the only one who was strange. Everyone laughs often, but only I cannot laugh normally. But I always wondered. Why am I different from everyone else? Why am I the only one who is not "happy"? My parents and the adults in the neighborhood all say they are "happy." Indeed, smiles never cease wherever I look. But to my eyes, they looked like nothing but creepy smiles.

Because on the chests of those who were always laughing, something like a black mist was attached. Because I felt it was something very unpleasant. The only ones without the black mist attached seemed to be babies or small children like me at the time. Surrounded mostly by "happy" people, I found it creepy even as a child, so I couldn't laugh normally. And apparently, I was the only one who could see the black mist. It was a world only for me, invisible to anyone else. Where does "happiness" come from?

Eventually, a child older than me became "happy." That child who always teased me for being gloomy also became a human who just laughed without any thorns. It was as if they had become someone I didn't know. I was scared. Will I become "happy" someday too? I couldn't think of that as a wonderful thing, and I spent sleepless nights alone. The ones who comforted me, who was frightened of everyone, were animals. The friendly stray Tartals seemed to live naturally.

They can never laugh, but when they receive bread crumbs from me, there is a pink mist on their chests, and it was obvious from their attitude that they were happy. Unlike "happy" people, that felt like something very warm. I could laugh naturally only in front of them. One day. When I was trying to give bread crumbs to the Tartals as usual, I found one staggering.

"Does it hurt...? Were you attacked by something?" Looking closely, the Tartal had suffered a deep injury. And on its chest, a black mist hung. It was much thinner than the one attached to people. But the Tartal was suffering greatly.

"Wait! I'll bring first-aid tools right now!" Although inexperienced, I treated it desperately, and the Tartal seemed to have barely survived. It became energetic enough to snuggle up to me and lick my hand, so I was relieved too. But the black mist continued to hang on its chest. It was enduring the pain. Pain. Pain...? When I realized that, I received a tremendous shock in my young mind. Ah. I understand. I understand what the black mist is. This is...

the true identity of what everyone called "happiness" was—"Pain"! Much worse than the wound this child suffered, they harbored a pitch-black "pain" so deep they didn't even realize they were hurt. Why did I think "happiness" was scary? At that moment, I understood clearly. There's no way one can like "pain." There's no way "pain" is a good thing.

"Pain" turned everyone into someone creepy. It changed everyone.... If so. Why is everyone in "pain"? Even the children around me who weren't in pain, why does everyone become in "pain"? Something outrageous is happening. Without knowing, adults received "pain" from something outrageous, and changed. Only me. Only I realized this just now. Before I knew it, I was crying. Thinking of the suffering of my parents and everyone, I couldn't help but run.

"Papa! Mama!"

"What's wrong? Celia." Both of them had artificial smiles pasted on. Because I understood the cause, I didn't think it was scary anymore. I just thought they were pitiful. But I didn't know how to eliminate the "pain."

"Papa, Mama, it hurts, right? Actually, it hurts so much you want to cry, right? What should I do. What should..."

"What a strange child. Mama doesn't hurt anywhere."

"Ahaha. You always say strange things. Celia." They comforted me, patting my head. It was thought to be a child's nonsense. While comforting me, my parents talked above my head.

"She's probably at the age where she gets anxious without basis. I was scared of ghosts when I was small too."

"I wonder what I was like. But it's okay. Celia." And Mama told me this.

"When you turn eight soon, you'll receive a 'Blessing' from 'God-sama', okay?"

"... Eh? What... is that?"

"When you receive a 'Blessing' from 'God-sama', you can feel very warm."

"We received it when we turned eight too."

"There will be nothing to be anxious about anymore."

"A... u, a..." I became very scared and instinctively ran out of the house.

"Celia! Wait!" This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it.

"Where are you going!?" I ran desperately down the main street with my small legs. I had only a bad feeling. Is that "Blessing" truly a "Blessing"? Isn't it actually a curse or something? I thought I had to check. The city where I live is at the foot of the Great Temple where "God-sama" lives. The Great Temple was big enough to be seen from anywhere in the city, and it was within walking distance even for a child's legs. I'm turning eight soon, but there must be children turning exactly eight today.

What will happen to them? I thought I had to check. And at the destination I arrived at, I saw it. Children entering the temple. Children leaving the temple. Before and after that, I saw that pitch-black "pain" being born. Overcome with terror, I collapsed on the spot. —Ah.

"God-sama". Was "God-sama" not a god? Was he a devil? My parents said he was "God-sama" who improved everyone's lives. In any fairy tale, everyone praised him. And yet. The "pain" blacker than a deep wound was given by none other than "God-sama." Tears came out again. Seeing the repulsive power that torments people without their awareness, my small body trembled. But that wasn't all. Eventually, what welled up was anger against the absurdity. You! Was it you! Not just Papa and Mama. Everyone. Everyone in the world!

Without even letting them realize they are hurt, he is tormenting them. Distorting them. That was a betrayal against the people who trusted him—against the world. Even without knowing the meaning of difficult words, I understood that. I have to save Papa and Mama and everyone. I have to save them from the hands of the bad "God-sama"! My young heart burned with a sense of mission.

"Everyone! You mustn't receive 'God-sama's' 'Blessing'!" Anyway, I shouted in front of the temple. For small me, that was the best resistance I could offer. However, who would believe a child's words? Especially when the opponent is "God-sama." Because I made too much of a fuss, eventually an adult guard pulled me up.

"No! Let me go!" As I struggled desperately,"—What in the world is the matter?" A sweet voice that seemed to melt the ears was heard. I intuitively knew the owner of the voice was "God-sama." When I turned around and looked directly at him, only a pathetic frightened voice"Hii" got stuck in my throat. I couldn't even scream from too much fear. —Where is the "God" in this? He is a monster in human form. I was convinced. Because... he is pitch black. What covers this person is only "pain."

An existence far from the happiest, seemingly nothing but despair.

"Yes. That is... this child was shouting that you are a villain."

"It's a child's nonsense. Let her go. See, she is frightened."

"God-sama" had the guard release his hand, cleared the people, and approached me. I tried desperately to run away, but my legs were frozen and didn't move.

"God-sama" picked me up. When I understood what was going to be done, I was screaming frantically.

"... Ngh... No! Noooooo!" A hand clad in black mist reached out. No! Stop! I don't want to become "happy"!

"Pain" entered. At the excessive "pain," I could only cry and scream. But as I endured the "pain" that "never stops," suddenly he seemed to stop holding his hand over me. I don't know why he stopped. I hadn't become "happy."

"Hoh. I see—You. I see. I see." At the chilling eyes as if he found something interesting. At the malicious smile, I was terrified from the bottom of my heart. I thought I would be killed just like that, but surprisingly, he put me down gently. It was out of composure. He said with a voice clearly mixed with contempt.

"Little girl. It seems you have found out."

"A, ah, I knew it...! Return Papa... Mama... everyone to normal!"

"Hahaha. It's useless. You can become no one. You can save no one. No one saves you."

"U, uuu...!"

"I won't do anything barbaric like killing. It's only a little longer anyway. You should just be crushed by your powerlessness. All alone." Thus, thrown out "acquitted," I was surrounded by countless artificial smiles pitying me. I ran away. I didn't want to be anywhere. I didn't want anyone to see me. Crushed in body and mind, I came to a place with no one on the outskirts of the city and broke down crying.

"U, aa... a, aa, aaaaaah!" I cursed my powerless self. I cursed my small self. It's just as "God-sama" said. Who can I tell? Who would believe? Everyone, no one would side with me. The world has fallen into his hands. I am... all alone.

"Help... Someone... Help me...!" At that moment, that person appeared.

"Sorry. If I had come a little earlier, I wouldn't have let you go through such a painful experience." I was picked up lightly, and without understanding why, my head was patted. Looking up blankly, a stranger man's face was reflected. He felt like a somewhat innocent older brother. Actually I have to be vigilant, but at that time I didn't have such composure, so I just let him be. Besides, from this person, I felt a strangely reassuring, warm feeling.

But when I tried to bury my face in his chest, I was surprised from the bottom of my heart. Enough for my tears to retract. Because. If "God-sama" was pitch black, this person had countless transparent wounds all over. This person is strange... Why is he okay...? How can he live properly...? I couldn't help but wonder. I couldn't believe it. Even if I add up the "pain" of everyone in this town, it wouldn't be enough at all.

Because he carried "pain" in one body that would naturally drive a normal person mad, and still remained calm.

"Um... are you okay...?" To me who inadvertently asked in a stupid voice, the older brother tilted his head.

"Okay? —Ah. I'm okay, I'm okay. Despite how I look, I'm reasonably strong. Big brother is." The older brother answered as if he understood the content of my worry. Then the older brother narrowed his eyes lovingly, matched the height of his face to my line of sight, and said.

"You are a kind person. You worry about people more than your own suffering. You are a person who understands people's pain." At those words, my heart was pierced unexpectedly. Because those were words that shouldn't have come out unless he understood my mysterious power. Because I thought he understood for the first time what I thought no one understood. The world only I could understand.

"I, I. You see... um, everyone... is... in pain... suffering...!"

"Yeah. Yeah." The older brother kept listening silently to me sobbing as if the hoop came off and talking about the circumstances incoherently.

"I am Yu. I am traveling."

"Heh. You're a traveler."

"Also, I help people as a hobby."

"So you came to me?"

"Yeah. Because you were crying." He said it as if it were natural, but how did he find me crying in a corner of the outskirts?

"... Now, Celia. As you know well, the world is in crisis."

"What does that god intend to do?"

"It might be a little difficult to understand." The older brother explained carefully so that even small me could understand. In short, that bad "God-sama" first makes people's lives convenient and multiplies them. So to people, it looks like he is doing very good things, but the real purpose was beyond that.

"Actually, he is a scary creature who pastes 'happiness' on multiplied people, raises them a lot, and then eats them all."

"Eh!? What's that!?"

"Humans who have 'happiness' extracted lose their hearts and die. Since everyone will be killed like that, at this rate the world will perish."

"No way...!" Hearing the story, I shuddered at what a terrible thing he did.

"How do we defeat such a monster?"

"Right. Honestly, I also thought he might be quite a difficult opponent. Because the bad 'God-sama' you speak of manipulates the hearts of people all over the world. Making an enemy of 'God-sama' means making enemies of people all over the world."

"I see..." I didn't want to think about such a terrible thing as Papa and Mama becoming enemies.

"But it looks like we can manage." Yu looked at me and smiled warmly—that was the first natural smile of someone I saw.

"Really?"

"Yeah. Listen. Listen well. Do you want to save Papa and Mama and everyone?"

"Of course!"

"Good. Then please, keep that precious feeling strong forever. So that you never lose to a bad 'God-sama'."

"If I do that, what happens...?" I didn't understand. If feelings alone could manage, I think I would have managed long ago. Even I understood the reason that a frail child cannot match a monster. But, as if that—having a feeling of not losing—was truly important. Yu winked with a smile.

"If you do that, I will help you just a little bit. So that you can save everyone."

"Me, everyone...?"

"Exactly. If this world can be saved, it is none other than your will desiring to save everyone. The fate of the world depends on you."

"Really...? I... Can I really save everyone...?"

"It's okay. You can become a splendid hero. You can save everyone." There was no basis. We just met. Why? I felt like I could believe this person. A warm feeling and strong courage welled up at the same time. Yu, who stood up a step ahead, looked forward and muttered as if savoring hidden thoughts.

"There is no need to be frightened alone anymore. This world won't lose to an unreasonable fate. Unchanging daily life will continue tomorrow and beyond—I came for that." And he reached out to me and pulled me up gently. Even though the opponent is a child like me, as if doing so to a comrade in an equal position.

"Now, let's go. To save the world a little." And we killed "God," and the traveler left like the wind.... Living in just one world, perhaps the day will never come when I can understand the full picture of that incident. I will probably never truly understand the value of this world and myself being saved. But. Still, the great evil was surely defeated within some great flow. Defeated before the will of the person who stood against it. I feel like I understand just that.

"... Who are you?"

"Just a passing traveler. I came to defeat you."

"I don't know who you are, but you talk big."

"I looked into you. Star-Class Lifeform—《Star Eater》 Itasevaris, right?"

"Hoh. To think you know of me. Was there data left in the Dyler Star System or something?"

"... Hey. Why don't we stop this around here?"

"Stop what?"

"There was once a man-eating monster like you. He was a monster by nature. No matter what, he was an existence incompatible with humans. So we had to stop him no matter what."

"What are you trying to say?"

"You should have been different. You were once human. I know. Not in this form. How many humans you have truly made happy."

"Nonsense. That's an old story."

"There's no need to eat up 'happiness' completely, is there? Just getting a little share is fine, isn't it? Couldn't you have lived like that? You should be able to do it even now!"

"... Hmph. I wondered what you would say. Living too long lacks stimulation. Boredom, boredom... I only have this much pleasure left."

"I see... Then, you end here—there is no future."

"A mere human. How many who challenged me like that have I...!? Wha... That aura... Impossible! You are...!?"

"... Here I go."

"Impossible...! I know your ability! You should have mastered this world long ago!"

"Wrong. Not everything."

"Ha!? No way...! That little girl!?"

"You overlooked the determination of a single girl. That is the cause of your defeat!"

"... A, ah. Is this, the end? Finally, I can end, huh..."

"... You idiot. You really are a hopeless idiot. You are..."