Chương 38: Chapter 35 - Guanz Fight!!!

["On your right!"] Cyrus shouted. ["Duck!"] Song dropped to his knees, and the soldier bringing down a heavy pillow on his right overswung and fell down to the ground with an oof. ["Ahaha! I can't believe that the first real kung fu fight I get to see is a pillowfight!"] Cyrus roared with laughter. There was absolute chaos in the guanz as soldiers, warriors, scholars, and shepherds swung fists and seating pillows at each other with abandon.

The hard cushions made for a handy bludgeoning tool and shield, while ensuring that they'd still be allowed back into Chef Cho's establishment in the future. Probably. Most of those involved in the fight were Lees, though not all. Dami stood protectively over Mae, her tentacle snaking out to push back anyone who got too close. Song's fairer friend had shoved Mae under the table the second the fight had broken out, while asking the girl to keep their instruments safe.

Jinu was the only cultivator amongst the Jos present, and just a novice at that, but he still used his shepherd's crook with non-deadly efficiency. He hooked people off their feet, or pulled opponents out of the scrum by their necks. Then he'd breathe a cloud of fine sand into their face, leaving them coughing and spluttering on the ground with weeping eyes and snot pouring from their nostrils. At the center of it all were Hamin and his fellow soldiers.

They worked with brutal teamwork, stepping forward, swinging their pillows or fists, and driving people before them. They'd started on the other side of the counter, and were slowly moving forward while clearing the space. Hamin was yelling orders at the top of his lungs, and his face was slowly turning a deeper shade of red the longer things went on. Song took stock of himself. So far he'd suffered two blows to the cheek, and a solid kick to the solar plexus that'd left a big red welt.

["Don't forget your Starlight Bridge! Use your Sign, man!"] Cyrus snapped. ["Focus!"] Song ripped open his deel and flared his dantian. He spotted his reflection in an ornamental plate hanging from the far wall, and stepped – Coming out of his reflection with a pop and stumbling headfirst into the metal plate with a GONNGGG!

"MY SERVING DISH!" Chef Cho shrieked.

"Don't you dare break that!" Cyrus drew in a breath. ["Oooh, that looked like it hurt!"] It did. Song held his pounding head and took a moment to reorient himself, before looking for another place to make the jump. On the other side of Chef Cho's cooking area, Hamin had reached Jinu and the other Jo's. A punch to the gut sent a Jo cousin flying, crashing against the wall next to Mae's table. ["Look over at the counter!"] Cyrus suggested. ["There's fresh ammunition!"] Chef Cho had put out a dozen bowls of soul on the front counter, ready to be served. The only people nearby were a few groaning casualties.

"But I don't think I can throw like that again!" Song hissed.

"It was a lucky shot!" ["Just use the lacrosse stick behind the bar!"]"If I use Crack Shot I could actually kill someone, Cyrus!" ["It's fine! Remember how to scoop? Just scoop, but follow it through with a toss! Just like the fish!"] Song blinked. He could do that. Maybe. He flared his dantian, aiming at the liquid reflection in the bowls and stepped – And promptly arrived next to Dami, stepping out of his reflection in Dami's golden disk earring.

The girl yelped in surprise and swung around, her tentacles reaching for Song. But Song had already flared his dantian again, this time aiming for Chef Cho's giant wok. He arrived next to it with a pop and barely kept himself from bowling into the roiling liquid. Chef Cho was hiding behind the bar. When he saw Song he snapped angrily, "You started this, Lee Song, fix it before I call the guards! And get out of my kitchen!"

"Yes, Chef Cho." Song bowed and grabbed his staff.

"Sorry, Chef Cho." Then he hopped up onto the counter by the soup, to the balding man's shrieked outrage. Song planted his feet on either side of a bowl, grabbed near the head of the stick with his right hand, and the butt with his left. He took a deep breath, then scooped. The tall soup bowl sat poorly in the scoop, and he fumbled it. The bowl seemed to fly in slow motion, spinning through the air and launching soup and dumplings in a wide arc.

Before it'd even landed, Song was already launching the second, and the third, and the fourth, his Void qi enhanced body moving more quickly than a regular human's ever could. This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon. The first bowl arrived with a splatter at Hamin's feet. The big man turned around just in time to receive the second bowl right atop his head. The third and fourth showered over the rest of his followers, causing them to duck back, spluttering.

They all shouted with outrage as warm soup and dumplings rained on them with abandon.

"An opening!" Jinu shouted. He and his shepherds swept the feet out from under the soldiers and began battering them with the hard pillows.

"LEE SONG!" Hamin roared, stepping back from the line and running for the counter. He tried to dodge another incoming bowl of soup, but slipped on the wet floor and took it directly to his nose. When he rose once more, a trickle of blood seeped out of his left nostril. He wiped it away and then stared at his hand, his already red face growing purple with rage. ["Uh oh, he's big mad. Time to run?"] Cyrus said. As if in reply, there was the Shing!

of metal as Hamin drew a hidden dagger from beneath his armored skirt. There was sudden silence in the tent. Everyone stopped fighting and stared at the Lee family soldier. ["Definitely time to run–"] Cyrus repeated, but Song ignored him.

"You're drawing a weapon? Here?" Song asked, his voice hard.

"Against kin?" Hamin spat blood and wiped his face to clear his eyes of soup.

"You've disrespected me enough, brat. I don't care who you are. To disrespect one of the Emperor's men is to disrespect the Emperor Himself!"

"And here I thought you were one of my men," a sharp voice cracked from the entrance to the yurt. Every eye turned to the gently waving flap, where a tall man in a finely made deel stood framed against the sunlight. Seojoon.

"I come for a drink after a long council meeting, and what do I find?" He drawled.

"My warriors in the middle of a brawl in Chef Cho's guanz."

"Seojoon!" Hamin said, backing up and stuttering.

"I – I –!" He pointed a finger at Song.

"He started it! He threw soup at me!" Seojoon turned a burning gaze onto Song. His horns glowed green and began to expand with thorny growths. He stepped forward, and the yurtwagon quivered under his feet. For once, his swept eyebrows were sinister instead of handsome.

"Lee Song. Explain." His voice was soft, yet it filled the room. Song lowered his staff, which still had a bowl of soup in it. He'd seen Seojoon stern, and overbearing, he'd seen him laugh, and he'd even seen him angry. But he'd never had that anger directed at him before. It was as powerful and domineering as standing before a rampant horse. The Black Stallion of Changpo.

"BROTHER!" There was a gasping sob, as Mae ran out from beneath the table and bowled into Seojoon's legs. She clutched there tightly, sobbing into his thighs.

"Mae??" Seojoon said, aghast.

"What are you doing here?"

"I was looking for Song, and followed Hamin here! Then they started yelling at people and fighting!" Mae explained past coughing sobs. Seojoon looked up at his soldiers once more, and this time his eyes were murderous.

"You started a fight, while you knew my sister was here!?"

"Seojoon, I – " Hamin began, then came to a halt as Seojoon held up a hand.

"Silence," Seojoon ground out, turning back to Song.

"Tell me what happened." Song stood tall, remembering his pride as the son of Lee San.

"They were causing a commotion! Being rowdy and insulting others in the guanz. It was behaviour unbecoming of a Lee, and I chastised them for it!" Seojoon glanced back at Hamin.

"He threw soup at me!"

"And??" Seojoon roared.

"He's nearly a child. YOU ARE A MAN! Are you so weak to provocation that you forget your head? How can I trust you with command when you fall for childish taunts!?" For once, Song didn't feel angry at being called a child.

"No. I don't want to hear it," Seojoon said, his voice quivering with rage.

"Report to my yurt. I'll decide what to do with you there. As for you, Lee Song, I'll be having words with Juwon about this."

"But they started it!" Song argued. Seojoon's voice was firm.

"If you lack the strength to end a fight, you shouldn't be starting one. You too need to learn to eat your pride, Song. I don't care who your Master may or may not be. As the son of Lee San your actions fall on the entire family. Do you understand?" Song's eyes were downcast, and he bit his lower lip.

"Yes, Seojoon."

"Good. Now everyone out!" Seojoon said, raising his voice. All the members of the Lee family began to file out, to murmurs of pain and taunting laughter from the other patrons. Seojoon took Mae aside with him to briefly speak with Chef Cho, then followed his men. Song approached the counter with trepidation, and laid his hard-won gold yuanbao down with only a slight tremble.

"I apologize, Chef Cho. It was wrong of me to throw soup in your guanz." Chef Cho stared down at him with crossed arms. When the gold piece landed on the wood, he swept it up and stuck it in his apron, his gaze softening slightly.

"Good, and the next time you're here, maybe avoid starting any fights, ahh?"

"Yes Chef." Chef Cho stared at the downcast youngster and then leaned forward to whisper, "Between you and me, you put on a good show, little Lee." Song grinned.

"Thank you, Chef." Cho nodded back, then pointed at his doorflap, his voice cross once more.

"Now get out! All three of you!" Song turned around to find Dami, and Jinu standing there waiting for him. They fled the yurt together. Dami smoothed her guzhuang the instant they were out, then checked her hair.

"Kindly warn me the next time you're planning to do something like that, Song." Song grimaced, rubbing his side.

"I wouldn't say I planned that." Jinu had a black eye, but was otherwise his usual relaxed self.

"Why the long face, you two? We won!" He gave a wide grin. Song and Dami stared at their friend with twin looks of exasperation.

"Come on, let's go see my family and get you both patched up," Dami said with a sigh.