Chương 5: 4-Game Afternoon

Billy woke to the smell of a hearty breakfast. Bob no longer needed sleep and had spent the night cooking. He carried half a pantry in that ridiculous Inventory perk of his and had put it to good use. Knowing him, he had probably discovered a few new Tastecraft perks while doing so. Good morning, Billy. I fell down the stairs on the way to the bathroom. Now, each time I fall down the stairs, I add +20% to a random stat and get a new magical power. Let me demonstrate.

That was exactly the kind of thing Bob would say. He could be irritating that way, but Billy was not one to criticize—he was just as overpowered as him. His thoughts again went to his girlfriend. Jenna had been basically stuck with the same powers she got on day one. She had just become much more proficient at their use. She never complained, but he knew her well and suspected she was quietly afraid of being left behind.

The farmer families were gathered in the mess hall, looking at Bob's cooking as if they were lost puppies seeking an owner. It was not even funny. Hunger never was. They were whispering among themselves. Billy could easily understand their language now—Jenna had been busy.... I swear to Ymar, he only had three eggs when he started cooking. How can he cook six omelets with only three eggs?... … it is no longer safe here. These three killed forty dungeonspawn yesterday; more will come to investigate… …

oh, god, I have lived all my life in this house, and so did my father before me. I don't want to leave it…

"Good tidings to you all, may the gods hold the roof over your head," Billy said in perfect Vorian, using the traditional greeting. They all gasped and looked at him. The foreigners could now speak their language. One of the teenage girls blushed furiously. She had probably made some inconvenient remark, thinking Billy could not understand her. The truth is that he could not, at least not until today. He was not going to explain this to her, though. Served her right.

Jenna joined him at the table as Bob served everyone generous portions of the delicious Pantean omelet.

"Goodman Doran, we need to know the lay of the land if we are to help you," she said, addressing the mature man who acted as a leader for the group.

"Is there any safe zone we could escort you to?"

"The Reclamation's edge is fifty miles west of here. It should be relatively safe," Doran answered, after thinking for a second.

"We would have tried it ourselves if we did not have kids and elders in our group. The land is dangerous, though. It is ripe with Tribulations and dungeonspawn."

"What is the Reclamation?" asked Bob.

"One year ago, we lost almost everything to the Tribulations. Balance declared the current situation untenable and announced we were going to push back against them," Doran explained.

"He organized small teams of adventurers to clear and tame dungeons, creating essence-free zones where humans could expand. The Reclamation is the name given to the zone freed by these teams."

"What does Balance look like?" asked Jenna.

"We do not know. No one has ever seen him," Doran said quietly.

"How do you know the orders came from him?" said Billy around a mouthful of omelet.

"Because some of the adventurers that took part in these teams regained the ability to level. Some of them are almost Omega rank," Doran told him.

"Now, that is interesting," Bob said.

"Do you think they could have developed Alchemy, or its equivalent?"

"I already questioned him yesterday about that," answered Jenna.

"They do not even know what Alchemy is. No one could level at all until, suddenly, a few could. At incredible speeds and inside a locked system." Bob whistled.

"That is beyond Alpha leveling speed. There is something very strange going on here."

"We are not going to cross the land," Jenna answered curtly. Billy knew she was planning on doing a Captain Beaky —linking her mind to some member of the local flying fauna and making it drop a dimensional beacon at the desired destination. Suddenly, she gasped and stood up.

"The Compendium has contacted me. He has a ping. It is ten miles east of here, in the abandoned city."

"That is not too far off," Billy mused.

"We could have a quick look, and then come back and see to these people," he said in English. The three Vorian families had clearly come to see them as protectors, and they counted on them to escape this place without retribution from the Tribulation Army. They would not like it if the Losers left without them.

"I will explain this to Doran," Jenna said curtly.

"We must check this."

"These people will panic if we do that, Jenna," Bob said quietly.

"They think we are going to ditch them. They blame Lana, the young mother who betrayed us to the Essentials. I think one of us should stay here to set them at rest. I will do it," he ended.

"No, Bob. Thank you for volunteering, but it takes both of us to work a long-distance teleport. It has to be you, honey," Jenna said, turning to Billy.

"If there is any trouble, just contact us through the blood link. There is a dimensional beacon in the house. Bob and I will use it to teleport back here." Billy understood Jenna's reasoning and knew she was right. He also knew Bob; he had volunteered so that he and Jenna could have some alone time together, even if it was spent hunting a mad demigoddess across an abandoned city filled with monsters—the perfect romantic getaway.

Billy could probably fulfill Bob's role too, but he would have to spend precious AP assuming a River Dragon-based shape, the only one of his incarnations with power over space. They were in war mode and inside a locked system: Achievement points were a valuable asset, not to be wasted. Even if he spent his time corpse-camping and exploding among enemies, he would still be limited by the need for experience tonic, which could run out. A pity.

He enjoyed his escapades with his girlfriend, but it was not to be, at least today. This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it He briefly hugged Jenna, as Bob's shape flickered and slowly turned into his manta form. The Vorians gasped in surprise. God, can't he just create another flying perk, based on literally anything else? Billy thought. That one looks just terrifying.

He suspected Bob was so fond of that shape because it allowed him to keep in contact with Charlie Vanaugh, Bob's main and only imaginary friend. Billy suspected Charlie was taking on a real identity, much as Essentials do when interacting with Experientials. That is just what we need to complement the team: an ass-biting Hollywood star that only exists in Bob's mind. Not weird at all, Billy thought ruefully.

Then he waved goodbye to them both as Jenna leaped lithely onto Bob's back and they flew away towards the distant city. They had briefly discussed teleporting to it using the coordinates provided by the Compendium, but had decided it was probably safer to approach it carefully. Billy watched them go until they became a speck in the sky. Then he turned towards the Vorian families, who were watching him anxiously.

"You wouldn't happen to have Scrabble, would you?" he asked softly in Vorian. They all looked at each other.

"We do not know what that is, Freeman Billy," a young girl answered him.

"It was just a joke. It is a cardboard game we have on my planet," he explained.

"Oh, you mean like Hegemony," one of the kids said, getting a boxed game from one of the drawers and placing it on the table.

"Yes, just like that," Billy said, his face lighting up. Table games were one of the few distractions allowed by Aunt Ethel, and he was very fond of them.

"Be careful, Freeman Billy," Doran told him gravely.

"Some say that the game is cursed; it makes people hate each other." Billy ignored him as he placed the pieces on the table while perusing the instruction manual that came with the box. How bad could it be?

"... and you have fallen into my distillery," Rona, the precocious eight-year-old who was leading the game, cheerfully told Billy.

"You must pay four pigs and the dowry of my daughters."

"How many do you have by now?" asked Billy, dreading the answer.

"Two more, since the last round. Eight now. Each dowry consists of two goats and one track of land," Rona said triumphantly.

"I can't pay that," Billy confessed.

"I am broke."

"Then you lose your tongue and your left hand, and you become my thrall for the rest of the game," the girl explained.

"I have lost, then," Billy admitted.

"Losing? No, Billy, you have not lost," Rona told him with a cruel smile.

"Losing is for people who play better than you. You become my thrall. You keep playing for the rest of the game, but you do what I say now. And you call me Mistress Rona."

"It is in the rules," she quickly added, noticing Billy's cold gaze.

"Read the instruction manual if you don't believe me." Billy briefly imagined her being ambushed by the centaurs, but he quickly dispelled the vision, feeling ashamed of himself—poor centaurs—and turned back to the board. Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. Not a polite knock—the kind that makes you wonder whether it's knocking or breaking in. Druna, Rona's mother, entered the room in a panic.

"Akiros' huntsmen. They want to speak with Doran," she said in a hush.

"How many?" Billy asked calmly.

"Four centaurs, each carrying a hag," the woman answered, fidgeting with her hands.

"A small party, then," Billy said as he turned towards Doran.

"Let me handle this. If I can solve it without resorting to violence, I can buy us more time until Bob and Jenna return." Billy disappeared in a flash of light, returning as a centaur. Basic shapes had an advantage over essence gestalts: they carried with them all the knowledge of the original mold, including language and social norms. Billy had used this ability to successfully infiltrate the Turalian Overseer camps a few months ago. The centaur shape was husky and clearly not meant for indoor use.

The house, which seemed so spacious before, reminded Billy now of the diminutive treehouse he had in his first home, ages ago, before his parents had passed away. He had to duck and twist his body to successfully navigate the corridors. He opened the door as a stunned centaur looked at him.

"What are you doing inside one of the filthy dens of the two-legs-with-no-magic? Do you have no respect for yourself?" the squad leader asked him in the brutish language of their people.

"They are under investigation for the disappearance of a whole company," Billy answered. The best way to lie was to mix it with facts.

"I've been ordered not to lose sight of them. Do you want me to tell my chieftain that you question his wisdom?"

"No, that is fine. It is your pride that is being shamed, not mine," the other centaur quickly answered, clearly not wanting any trouble with those above. God, these guys so remind me of the Overseers, thought Billy. Once you have seen a bully, you have seen them all. The hag he was carrying on his back barked a screeching, cruel laugh.

"This one must have blundered badly to be given such a task, Burko. What did you do? Did you piss in the sacred pool?" she mocked him.

"I killed my rider," Billy answered her coldly. That shut her up. The squad turned around, keen on leaving. Billy sighed. He had solved this rather elegantly. He did not want to take all these guys at once. He might have to resort to exploding, which could endanger the Vorians and draw more centaurs if anyone were within hearing distance. Suddenly, the leader turned around.

"One other thing," he said to Billy.

"We will need food if we are to explore. Send one of the humans to us. One of the kids. We have to be fast, and I do not want us to be encumbered. And break its neck. I do not want blood on my coat." Billy thought for a moment.

"I am not your servant, Burko. You do not get to order me around as if I were." There was a moment of tension, then Billy suddenly deflated.

"I will send a human with your request out of respect for the sanctity of your task, though." He went back into the house. Burko snorted impatiently as he waited for their food to come. He turned sideways towards Snara and caressed her cheek.

"Once our task is over, we will return, and he will pay for having threatened you, my rider. I will feed him his own genitals and give you his heart as proof of my devotion." Snara smiled back, a smile full of fangs.

"You always say the most romantic things, Burko. That is why I like being your rider." Burko sighed contentedly. They had a good thing going. Three years riding together and not even one attempt to kill each other. She was the one. Suddenly, the door opened, and one of the humans came, carrying the corpse of a child, its neck bent at an unnatural angle. The stranger had made good his threat and sent a servant to do the task. That idiot has just added two more days of torture when the time came, Burko thought.

At least the corpse seemed to be in good condition. He placed it on his rump, between his back and Snara, and then the whole group galloped away, en route to their destination. They rode in silence for the better part of an hour, exploring in progressively wider circles, trying to cover as much ground as possible. They finally found their corpses. Their whole company had been slaughtered, much as their chieftain had feared.

"Most seem to have fallen to a magical explosion, but not all. What do you make of this, Snara?" he asked his rider. She had a quick mind, and he valued her counsel. Snara made a strangled gasp. Burko turned around and saw the cause of her distress. The bent neck of the child's corpse was righting itself with a sickening crunching noise. Suddenly, the kid opened its eyes, looking at Burko straight in the face with a calm but intense gaze. A gaze he had seen one hour ago in a different face. Then, the child spoke.

"Boom!" it said. Billy returned from the Blue Room in his own form. This whole thing had been expensive. He had to buy two different shapes, the Centaur and the Thousand-Faces Assassin. He had cut expenses by taking some tonic before exploding and reaping the squad, but he was still down four hundred Achievement Points. He sighed. Jenna and Bob never ran into this sort of trouble. Sometimes he felt more like an accountant than a hero. Still, not everything had been a total loss.

Achievement Unlocked: Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday: You have given yourself as a gift and earned achievement points from it. You have unlocked the Loot power. A loot power! Not a complete waste of four hundred points, then. He started the long walk home. Loot: You can buy loot charges from the loot store at the price of 10 points each. You can transmit a loot charge to any target you hit. If the target dies while under the effect of Loot, a reward will be created.

The quality of the reward depends on the type of foe and how powerful it is.