Chương 162: 159 - The Most Beautiful Art

Our return to the city causes a bit of a commotion. Apparently, a few of the people we apprehended were pretty well-known. I guess that makes sense, since they were pretty rich. Especially that one guy who said he was only there due to "academic curiosity." Even the scared kids are apparently reasonably well-known, and before we can properly turn them over to the authorities, a really strong Tier 6 elf comes in and starts scolding a short teenage girl who bawls the entire time.

After handing the criminals over, we report back to the guild, and make another minor commotion when Illiana asks to speak to the guildmaster. Apparently, in a city like this, the guildmaster isn't someone you can casually ask to speak to, and the second Illiana says it, the entire room gets a few dozen decibels quieter. The receptionist asks if we're sure the matter is worthy of the guildmaster's attention, and when Illiana confirms it, the room gets even quieter.

The receptionist asks us to wait, then disappears into the back room for a few minutes. A couple of the more outgoing Adventurers approach to ask us what happened, and Illiana and I cheerfully tell them about the demon cultists and the giant demon hand that is now roaming around the tunnels beneath the swamp. This seems to excite some of the other Adventurers, because something like this means that they'll put out an emergency Quest, and an emergency Quest means high rewards.

Before I can properly explain how durable it is, and the fact that it's a living severed arm and that the greater monster has "Immortal" in its name, the receptionist interrupts and tells us the guildmaster is ready to see us. The guildmaster has their office on the top floor, as guildmasters tend to do, but unlike other guild offices I've seen, this one is warded so well that even Food Sense can't see into it, so when the receptionist opens the door for us, I have no idea what to expect.

That's probably a good thing though, because having expectations would have made what we actually find inside even more bewildering. The person behind the guildmaster's desk is heavily modified, and in ways that I honestly can't comprehend. It's not like the balloon lady, who merely seemed to have taken human beauty standards to an extreme. If anything, she went the opposite direction erasing absolutely all sex appeal and aiming for pure practicality.

This person has gone beyond humanity, or elvenity, or whatever it would be called. She clearly used to be an elf, but I'm not sure if she can really be called that anymore. She has not one, not two, but four pairs of arms, and an unnaturally long torso to accommodate them all. Her chest is completely flat, her hips are narrow, and her legs… They're not visible from here, but I can sense them under the desk, and they are also extremely long, but in a weird way.

It looks like she tried to make them more like animal legs, with her thigh shorter, her shin longer, and then her foot extremely long, to the point it's like an extension of her leg. Her face looks mostly normal—beautiful, even—but there are a few subtle modifications that push her a tiny bit into the uncanny valley. Her eyes are yellow, and while I can't make out any specific details that are different from human eyes, they feel more like bird eyes. Her nose is long, and a little bit wide.

Not enough to look inhuman, but enough that based on the rest of her, I'm pretty sure she modified it too. And her ears, while elven, are unnaturally long and wide, extending all the way past the back of her head. Even sitting down behind the desk, she's already as tall as me, and I bet if she stood up, she'd be close to three meters. Currently, one pair of her arms is folded on her lap, one is writing something on a piece of paper, one is sharpening a sword, and one is braiding her long, silver hair.

Despite all of this, she is staring directly at us without blinking, and it feels like she's giving us her full attention. [Jane, Beast of Slaughter, lvl???]"What are you?" I blurt out before I can stop myself.

"An elf," she replies, her voice deep and raspy.

"Couldn't you tell?" She uses her free pair of arms to gesture at herself as she smiles, showing off a set of sharpened front teeth.

"I just wanted to make sure. By the way, how are you doing all that at once? Is it a Trait?"

"Split Mind," she says.

"Quite useful, in my opinion. I would recommend it to anyone who wants to be able to multi-task better. But you should be aware that it only splits what is already available. Excellent for simple tasks or spellcasting, but you will not be able to focus on multiple complex tasks at once."

"Like writing and talking?"

"I am writing down this conversation."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Everything?"

"Everything you say and anything noteworthy you do."

"Is anyone else going to read this?"

"Most likely not, but I like to keep records."

"How much detail do you go into for these 'noteworthy' things?"

"As much as I deem necessary. Are you planning to do something difficult to describe?"

"As soon as I think of something good."

"I'll look forward to it, then. In the meantime, I am told you have an important report for me. Something about a demon cult."

"Yes, we do," says Illiana.

"Go on," says Jane, nodding. Illiana gives a detailed report of what happened down in the underground city, occasionally giving me the floor for other stuff that I saw better, like the events in the chamber. Neither of us mention the tributes we collected from the cult members. When we get to the part where we describe Metztli, Jane seems to get extra interested, asking for a lot of extra details about what she looked like, and how strong she seemed to be.

"Metztli is one of the leaders of the cult of Limos as far as we can tell," she explained.

"We have learned of her from a few captured cultists in the past, but you are the first Adventurers to have seen her in person. Our best guess is that she is a drow, or at least a descendant of a drow. How her ancestors survived the Extermination Wars remains a mystery, but in the end, it doesn't really matter. She is a dangerous criminal, and she clearly is planning something that we would rather not see come to fruition. I'll put out some Emergency Quests immediately and inform Wesley."

Her stenographer hands set a full page aside, and start scribbling on the one below it. This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

"Is there anything else?" she asks.

"No, I think that about covers it," I say.

"Yes, that should be all the important details."

"Excellent. And Yona, I can see that you're fidgeting. Whatever you have planned, I am ready." I smile, and show off what I've been preparing, holding both hands out, palms facing her. On each, I have grown a mouth, a trick I was messing around with on the road from Maligar, and each mouth sticks its tongue out at her before I pull my hands back slightly, holding them palm-mouth upward. Then, I start juggling.

The left mouth spits out a small chunk of meat from my Stomach, while the left spits out a small chunk of Maligar wood. Each gets caught by the opposite mouth and taken back into my Stomach, and then something new gets spat out. Over the following seconds, I get a bit more creative with my juggling, summoning more interesting, and hopefully noteworthy, items, and sometimes spitting them in strange directions.

I spit one chunk of meat directly at Jane once, then use Snatch to pull it back before it can actually hit her. The miniature show ends after about a minute when I run out of random things to do. As a finale, I clap my hands together, then show the palms to her again, which are now devoid of any mouths, and look ordinary again. Illiana starts clapping, and Jane claps with two pairs of hands while one furiously scribbles on the paper, and the last continues working on the sword.

I curtsey and smile and ignore Abby telling me that what I just did was gross.

"Well done," says Jane.

"I'm certain that if anyone else reads this, they will be very confused."

"Awesome."

"Now, unless you have remembered something that you forgot to mention earlier, I believe this report is over. As entertaining as this is, I am a busy woman. Thank you for your time."

"No, thank you for yours," says Illiana.

"We'll get going now."

"Bye," I say, nodding.

"Actually, Yona, you stay for a moment. Illiana, you may leave." Illiana smiles at me, then curtseys toward the guildmaster before walking out the door. Once she's gone, Jane's hands simultaneously stop working. She sets down the pen and the sword, pushes her chair back from the desk, and stands up. Her head nearly reaches the ceiling, and she needs to hunch slightly to fit properly as she walks toward me.

She stops a meter in front of me, looking down with a slightly creepy smile, then squats down on her haunches so that she's close to my height.

"It's always good to meet a fellow Vivitect," she says.

"There are so few of us these days, ever since that idiot of a king outlawed the Class just because a few prominent ones were caught experimenting on kidnapped subjects. The experiments weren't even that bad, but the spineless brat caved in to public backlash and outlawed the Class."

"Uhhhh…"

"Don't be so nervous," she says, smiling and showing off her jagged teeth.

"I just wanted to offer you assistance, if you ever need it. Vivitecture is a beautiful art. If you're interested in learning more about bodily optimization, I would be happy to teach you." I look her up and down, taking in her extra arms and weird legs. If that's what 'optimization' looks like, I'm not sure I want it.

"I'll… I'll think about it." Jane lets out a short burst of laughter.

"Optimization doesn't have to look like this. There is more than one way to optimize, and the beauty of being a Vivitect is that you don't need to choose. I prefer this form because it is the one in which I am most comfortable, and the one that earned my Epithet, but I have others. For example…" Her body grows and warps, her arms growing longer and thicker, and her face getting broader and more monstrous.

"Intimidation." She shifts again, her body warping grotesquely as her extra limbs are pulled back into her body and her legs turn to normal. Her face shifts back to what it was originally, then changes a bit more, subtly enhancing her beauty. Her clothes change with her, shortening and tightening to fit her new shape, and a moment later, I am standing in front of a stunningly beautiful elf woman.

"High society." She shifts a bit more, filling out in the chest and widening her hips as her face shifts slightly.

"Seduction." Her body changes again, losing some of its shape, and her face loses its finest features, becoming nondescript.

"Running errands." The last change is a bit more subtle. Her face softens and gets rounder, and her eyes turn blue while her body settles into something partway between her running errands form and her seduction form.

"This is what I would look like without modifications," she says, her voice now gentle and soft.

"But even so, it's not quite what I would naturally be. Even while maintaining your current appearance, there are optimizations to be made. Muscle and bone density, vocal cords, hearing, vision… You can look exactly as you do now while being better."

"Hmmm…" That actually doesn't sound too bad.

"Of course, I highly recommend that you get more creative," she continues as her body shifts back to the form it was in when I first walked in.

"There's nothing more beautiful than a body that has been carefully crafted solely to accomplish one purpose. It's the highest art of all, and I am always happy to show another the wonders of Vivitecture."

"I'll… I'll think about it. For now, I should probably get back to my Party."

"Of course," says Jane, nodding and standing back up to her full height.

"I have work as well. But just know that my door is always open to my fellow Vivitects. Just say the word, and I will gladly make time to help you."

"Thanks for the offer."

"Any time," she says, turning to walk back to her desk. I leave the office, and the second the door closes behind me, I shiver slightly and the hair on the back of my hands. Wow, she's creepy.

"Really? I thought it was fascinating." I mean, it was interesting… but really creepy.

"I think you should take her up on her offer, if you find the time." Yeah, I might. But I think I'll need to mentally prepare myself. That was a lot.

"Fair." Also, what is that Epithet? Jane, Beast of Slaughter? Beast of Slaughter is such a cool Epithet, but "Jane" just completely ruins it. It's like being named "Bob, Destroyer of Worlds." It just doesn't roll off the tongue well.

"Well, it's not like she could choose her name." Yeah… Wait, actually, can you choose your name? Like, if I decided I wanted to be Jane instead of Yona, would the System change?

"I believe… Yes, there is. There's a name change application you can fill out, if you're interested. But if you do that, anyone who knew you under a different name will see the former name in addition to the current name. For example, if you changed to Jane, when Lauren saw your new Namecard, it would say 'Jane (formerly Yona).'" Huh. Interesting. Well, I definitely don't want that, but good to know. I start down the stairs, using Food Sense to scan for Illiana, but surprisingly, she's not there.

Even when I expand my scan to check the entire surrounding area, I can't find any sign of her. Weird. Well, whatever. There was always something funky about her. Disappearing randomly isn't that weird. It's not like I needed anything more from her. On the way outside, I get accosted by a few more curious Adventurers, who want more details about the demon arm, and I give them as much as I can before my stomach starts rumbling, and I decided I don't care anymore, and Blink out of the building.

I stop at a food cart on the way back to the inn, then have a nice big meal in the dining hall. Lauren is still out, and Chad and the twins are holed up in their workshop, so I eat alone. The next day, I sleep in, then do a quick Quest in the afternoon to earn a couple thousand more gold. I spot the Emergency Quest about the demon arm when I take that Quest, as well as a few more Emergency Quests to investigate the other ruins and check for cult activity.

The rewards are generous, the Guild is noticeably emptier than usual when I get there, probably because of everyone going on those Quests. When I return that evening, I find that Lauren has returned. Chad and the twins still aren't back yet, so we go to their workshop and fetch them back to the hotel. They're all filthy, so Lauren and I make them take baths, then we all head to the dining hall together, booking one of the table with the strongest privacy wards using my newfound cultist fortune.

"So, the frogs," I prompt.

"What did you find?"