Chương 107: 106 - Grief

Alexandra wandered through the courtyards of the academy. The cloud cover didn't let moonlight shine through. She knew Kam was following her, but she couldn't pay attention to him. Not now. Her thoughts kept returning to Louis and how he disappeared from her party. What happened to him? She didn't know, and that was what kept her moving. As much as she was trying to rationalize his disappearance, she could only see two explanations. Either he had left the party on his own or something had happened to him.

She didn't know why he would decide to leave. So something had happened to him, something bad.

"Alexandra."

"Not now, Kam." The boy closed his mouth. She kept walking until she reached the Keeper section.

"You can't go in there," Kam said.

"Watch me." She turned back.

"Stay behind. I'll meet you later."

"But…"

"Kam," she said. He nodded. Alexandra traversed the Keeper side of the Iron Library without being stopped and arrived in front of Raymond's door. She didn't knock, but the hinges moved by themselves. She entered.

"I wasn't expecting you so late," Raymond said, standing by the window.

"Where is Louis?" she asked. He turned to face her and tilted his head.

"He was very insistent on joining our delegation to the conclave in Samarand. I thought he told you."

"He did." Raymond nodded.

"Then? The conclave should be happening as we speak. I admit I have not asked my Keepers about his well-being, but there's no reason to be worried. He should be listening to a boring meeting between the religious heads of Laika."

"A meeting where the woman who destroyed his village will be present." Raymond sat in one of the chairs overlooking the window and gestured for her to come. She sat beside him.

"I don't think this trip is good for his mental state," he said.

"But he insisted, and he's an adult. About your age. He can make his own decisions."

"When did you last hear from him?" she asked.

"Him specifically? Before he left. But I've had reports from the delegation. No news is good news." Alexandra looked at the darkness outside. She didn't want to tell Raymond about her Adventuring Party. But chances were that he already knew. Louis did.

"Do you know my class perks?" Alexandra asked. Raymond looked at her.

"I can guess. Quests. Streak." She raised an eyebrow.

"Spit it out." He chuckled.

"Fine. You also have one to form a party."

"Louis is gone." He tapped the armrests of his chair with his fingers.

"Gone? From your list?"

"Yes."

"Could it be the distance?" Raymond asked.

"I…" Sickness of paranoia sent a burst of panic through her mind. He was fishing for more information.

"Maybe. I haven't checked in a while."

"Well, there's a simple way to know. Osera will report as soon as the meeting is over. I'll just ask her to reassure you." He produced a few pastries and a cup of tea from his spatial storage.

"Eat."

"I'm not cursed anymore." He smiled.

"I know. A shame. You could have exploited that malediction a lot more." Alexandra grabbed a pastry.

"Not worth it. The hunger was too much of an annoyance."

"I can imagine. However, sometimes, suffering is in your best interest." Raymond looked out the window as if he could peer through the night.

"This world isn't kind." Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon. She ate the pastry. It was good.

"Why didn't you go?" Alexandra asked.

"Conclaves are a pain. Boring meetings that never end. I have better uses for my time." He shrugged.

"Also, I don't want to see the others. They all hate me."

"And why is that?" His smile was wry.

"Good reasons, I suppose. We haven't always been kind to one another. I'd been more inclined to go if Jade and Jenna tagged along. My relationship with them isn't too strained. Unfortunately, Jade is stuck 'fighting' Valudipan's tide, and Jenna is hard to pin down."

"And the others do attend?" He shook his head.

"Usually, it's only Arthur. His Arbiters are based in Samarand, so he can't escape it."

"Usually?"

"Well, you're here now. Those who care one way or another would want to address that." Alexandra swallowed the last bite of the pastry.

"You aren't worried," she said.

"Should I be?" Raymond asked. He leaned back into the cushion, the dark fabric of his robes swallowing the low light of the room.

"Lila isn't me. She won't recognize him. People die every day, Alexandra. It is the nature of the system we inhabit. Do you know how many villages she's destroyed?" She shook her head.

"He's part of my party."

"Was," Raymond corrected. The word hung in the air between them. Alexandra felt a chill crawl up her spine, sharp and sudden. She pushed it down. It wasn't the time to let paranoia win. She needed answers only Raymond could provide.

"Was?" she asked. He shrugged.

"You came because he left the party." She nodded slowly. The teacup on the table rattled. Raymond did not reach for it immediately. He watched the surface of the liquid ripple. From his pocket, a small, smooth sphere of cloudy quartz slid into his palm. It hummed, vibrating against his skin with a dull, rhythmic pulse. Alexandra watched his hand.

"What is that?"

"A communication bead," Raymond said. His voice remained perfectly level.

"Linked to Osera." He closed his fingers around the stone.

"Osera. Before your report, I'm with Alexandra, and she's worried about her friend." Osera's voice came after a second of hesitation.

"The Legate recognized him as a follower of Ummi, and killed him before I could react. I'm sorry." Raymond opened his fingers, letting the cloudy quartz roll onto the wooden table. The bead settled with a quiet click, its surface completely dull. Alexandra stared at the small stone. The silence in the room grew heavy, crowding out the sound of her own breathing. Lila had killed him. The woman who had taken everything from Louis had finished the job, and Alexandra had done nothing to stop it.

She hadn't even tried convincing Louis not to go.

"I see," Raymond said. He didn't sound surprised. He simply reached out and adjusted the positioning of the teacup, aligning it with the edge of the saucer.

"That is unfortunate." Alexandra stood up. Her knees hit the edge of the table, causing the tea to ripple again, but she barely felt it. Her hands clenched into fists at her sides.

"Unfortunate?" she asked.

"Osera is one of the strongest Keepers, but she cannot oppose Lila," Raymond said, looking up at her. His expression remained smooth, entirely devoid of the warmth he usually faked.

"Louis made his choice when he chose to attend. I warned you that this world isn't kind."

"You knew," Alexandra said. The realization didn't come as a shock; it arrived as a cold weight in her stomach.

"You knew she would recognize him." Raymond tapped his fingers against the armrest.

"I knew it was a possibility, and I warned him of it. Louis was reckless. He allowed his anger to dictate his actions." He paused.

"If it's any consolation, I truly didn't think Lila would recognize him." Alexandra didn't argue. She couldn't. Her mind was already racing. She turned toward the door.

"Where are you going?" Raymond asked.

"To pack," she said, her voice dropping.

"Samarand is a long way from here, Alexandra," Raymond said to her back.

"It would be idiotic to throw yourself in Lila's jaw." Alexandra stopped.

"You want revenge," he said.

"You planned this."

"Please, I'm not so heartless as to kill a man to set you up against Lila." He didn't smile.

"She's dislikable enough that she would have met your ire sooner or later." He's lying. It wasn't just the paranoia speaking. She didn't trust one word coming out of his mouth. She shouldn't have come to the Iron Library in the first place. She'd been naive. A hundred years in this world was enough to change anyone. If Lila could destroy Louis' village, why couldn't Raymond do the same? But he was right on one point: running to Samarand was futile. She couldn't beat Lila.

Even if she could, she'd be long gone by the time she got there. To think she was trying to talk Kam out of his revenge. She should listen to her own advice. Bide her time.

"Furthermore," Raymond continued.

"It would be quite sloppy on my part. If I were behind this, you better believe that you wouldn't find out."

"I don't believe you. You're taking it too easy." He looked down.

"Alexandra, I've seen so many people die. Forgive me if doesn't do anything now. I'm more saddened by your grief than by Louis' fall, and I hate myself for it." She looked at him. He seemed sincere. Alexandra turned around and went for the door. He didn't stop her. She pushed the heavy door open herself this time, not waiting for the hinges to move on their own. The corridor outside was cold. She walked fast, the sound of her boots clicking sharply against the stone floor.

She reached the courtyard a few minutes later. The cloud cover still blocked the sky, leaving the academy grounds in deep shadow. Kam was exactly where she had left him, leaning against a stone pillar and kicking at a loose pebble. He straightened up when he heard her approach. She didn't stop. He followed in silence. When she reached her room, she found Willow waiting for her in front of the door.

"Alexandra, we need to talk."