Chương 127: Chapter 128: Jokes

"Why can't you trust stairs?" Moe bounced his eyebrows. The two were mid-walk, leaving the Heavenly Knead behind them, and heading towards... Actually, Evel didn't really know. He was just following Moe along for the ride. He needed to find a way to steer the conversation back towards the other two stories, but he had temporarily no choice but to play along.

"Why not?" He asked.

"Because they're always up to something!" Evel smiled.

"Ah yes, clever."

"It's because stairs are used to go from one floor to another, so when I say they're up to something, I mean they lead somewhere. Not that they're actually gonna do something bad!"

"There's... there's really no need to explain it each time."

"Oh. Well, you weren't laughing..."

"..."

"Don't worry, I got more." Moe's grin didn't falter. Evel internally took a deep breath.

"I'd love to hear them."

"Something about a well..." He grumbled.

"Ah, right! What do you call a blind man that can't see that well?" Can blind men see at all?

"WAIT!" Moe shook his hands.

"Let me tell it again." Evel nodded.

"Ever hear about the story of the blind man who fell down a well?" Moe asked. He just told me the punchline... Well, this is a good opportunity to show I can understand these jokes without issues.

"Was it because he couldn't see that well?" Moe stopped. His head slowly turned to Evel, the amusement wiped off his face.

"Yes." His pace increased, and Evel had to speed up to keep up. His speed was surprisingly quick for his build! Is he offended? Moe was seriously starting to get on his nerves. Somehow, no matter what he did, he was always doing the wrong thing. Moe abruptly stopped, and Evel almost ran into him. He slowly turned around, a fresh smile on his lips.

"I have another!" Evel focused. He didn't know how many more opportunities would come his way. Moe cleared his throat.

"What do you call a cow with no legs?"

"..."

"What do you call a cow with no legs?" Moe repeated louder.

"Wh-what?"

"GROUND BEEF!" He burst into laughter.

"Oh yeah, I get it. Hahahaha." Moe's eyes brightened.

"You actually got the joke?" Before Evel could say anything else, he burst out into laughter again.

"WHAHAHAHAAHHA!"

"Hahahahahaha."

"WHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Moe slapped Evel's back with such force that he almost got sent flying forward. He braced his legs and held firm.

"Oh man, it sure is good to find someone else with such a refined comedic taste." This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it"I have to agree," Evel said, smiling. This was the third time he'd heard this joke, but he didn't let it show on his face.

"I haven't laughed like this in ages."

"Get it? Because without legs, the cow doesn't have support, so it's on the ground. Hence ground beef!"

"Yep." Evel took a deep breath.

"I certainly do. It's a clever one that's for sure." Moe finally ceased his laughter and let out a long exhale.

"I wish you'd have read my plays earlier; who knew the friend I was hoping to meet one day was so close by." Evel was making progress. Once he remembered that, all the annoyance simply vanished.

"Indeed." Evel solemnly nodded.

"All this busy work is taking away the important things in life."

"Now, you tell one." Moe poked.

"What?"

"You tell a joke!"

"I'm not so sure that's a—""Oh, come on! I'm always the one making the room laugh, and now I just want to experience what it's like!" Is he serious?

"Comedy really isn't my specialty... I can show you a magic trick if you'd like?"

"Nonsense! I'm sure you have plenty of jokes flying around in that mind." Evel assessed Moe once again. There were a few possibilities. First, Moe may have been born with some learning disability or came in contact with toxins as a child. That would explain his behavior, and in that case the best move was to play along. Second, Moe was putting on some sort of act to hide his true self. Either way, the chances that Moe somehow managed to find out Evel was working for Agent were next to none.

Especially since he didn't even know that Evel had connected the dots on the stories. Unless it was supposed to be a trap all along, in which case Evel never had a hope of finding Dissent. But as Avid said, Agent isn't moving too aggressively, and Dissent weren't taking a lot of precautions. He needed to please Moe, but he was sure whatever joke he could come up with wouldn't do the trick.

"I could show you a magic trick," Evel insisted.

"But jokes really aren't my..." Moe's smile began to fade. Do I really have to... From his first ever interaction with the merchant to the times he spied on him, Moe had always behaved like this. From initially doubting him, Evel leaned more and more towards being convinced that there was no persona involved whatsoever. Which means... Evel gulped.

"A-alright, but give me a second to think of one." The merchant's stupid grin instantly returned. With the quality of jokes Moe told, the bar was as low as it could get. He just needed anything. With his mind blanking, Evel returned to reason. A joke is simple. A set-up, then a punchline. It can be a pun, or even a subversion. There are lots of ways to create one, and it shouldn't be hard. Moe patiently waited. Ok, I can't think of any, but it shouldn't be hard to create one of Moe's caliber.

A pun or a sound-alike... Knead sounds like need... Maybe there's something there? Heavenly knead... need... If I were to copy his joke, I could say something like: What's Heavenly Knead? Something I need. Evel cringed. It was time to change strategies. Surely I can repeat a joke someone told me... There has to be one in my back pocket... Moe's gaze didn't falter as Evel felt his back begin to dampen. Somehow, this was turning out to be one of his most stressful moments yet.

His mind scoured for any single joke, but it struggled desperately. Julius made jokes sometimes; maybe there's something there... The glare on him intensified. With a deep breath, Evel cleared his throat.

"I once showed a mime a magic trick." A pause.

"He was speechless."

"..." Moe must not have heard me.

"I once showed a m—""What's a mime?" Shit, of course he doesn't know!

"W-we don't have them, but members of the circus who perform silently."

"I still don't get it." Evel shrank back. First he'd repeated the joke after not receiving laughter, and now he was explaining it. He was becoming everything he hated.

"M-magic tricks sometimes shock people and leave them speechless... the mime already won't talk."

"Hmmm." Moe nodded wisely.

"S-so when I say he's speechless, it's redundant since he already won't speak."

"Say the joke again now that I get it." Humiliation.

"I showed a mime a magic trick." He lowered his head.

"He was speechless." Moe snorted, then boomed into laughter.

"Because he can't speak in the first place! WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

""N-now for the other plays—""A mime can't speak! WHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"The chicken, that one really interested me. Could y—""Eth, man, you're an amazing guy. I'm so glad I met you." Please don't.

"This is my home, by the way." Evel followed Moe's extended hand. He hadn't been paying much attention to the evolving landscape around him, nor did he realize he'd walked so far. A massive four-floor mansion with a huge fountain ahead. The gardens were filled with an array of gorgeous flowers and a few young female maids watering them.

"Don't worry, Eth," Moe said, nodding firmly.

"With my work ethic, I'll be at the circus early tomorrow morning! You can leave everything to me." I never invited you... Evel still failed to extract any meaningful information.

"About the actual plays themselves—""Phew, I'm exhausted." The merchant wiped his neck.

"We'll talk more tomorrow."

"..."

"You alright there?" Evel remained silent.

"I have a few other jokes I have written down; I'll bring them in for you tomorrow! WHAHAHAHAHA!" So far, Evel hadn't received any proper answers to his questions.

"Wait." He sighed.

"We're in the middle of some restructuring, so we wouldn't be able to accommodate you. Come the day after instead." Moe gave a fierce thumbs up.

"As you wish, boss." He owed the other workers a fair warning. After spending some time with the man, he knew it might not be easy. I also have to find a reason why we're hiring him... If he told them about the plays or if he told them he found Moe funny, they'd immediately know he was lying. Taking a sharp breath, Evel returned towards home. The days were getting shorter, and the streets were darkening, yet still too early for the lights to come on. He sighed again.

Hopefully, the circus wouldn't mind him too much.