Chương 83: R&R2 Ch. 22 — A Moment to Breathe

Jasmine was embarrassed. Incredibly so, how was she supposed to react to her boyfriend confessing that he might be catching feelings for her? That was impossible; that wasn't supposed to happen. She was going to fall first, and then she would mope forever since Nicholas would never see her like that. And they would just go through the motions and live in mediocrity ever after. Her face burned with his confession. It had been so off the cuff as well, like he hadn't cared how she responded, good or bad.

And when she had felt bad about it, he emotionally bludgeoned her until she stopped. She had been interested in Nicholas since before they became friends. You could only stalk someone for so long before you developed feelings, but when he had confessed, her brain had froze and her mouth had lied. And now they were in limbo, though Nicholas seemed content to just leave things the same; Jasmine just wasn't.

But she was also incapable of pushing them forward on her own; her grandmother had meddled in Jasmine's life so much she couldn't be sure of anything. And until they had some actual leeway to act, Nicholas would just be in more danger if they were dating. Not that her family had actually done anything recently. They were E-rank; now she was going to pass her mother pretty soon at the rate she and Nicholas were going. That wouldn't put her first in line or anything like that.

Grandma had a lot of descendants, and Jasmine had several cousins who had just as much direct-line claim. But that would put her at the fastest one so far, and that was going to draw more eyes to her. If she could convince Nicholas to slow down, they could probably avoid a lot of it. She looked to where Nicholas was still asleep. There wasn't a chance that he was going to slow down, and she didn't want to either; there was another option.

If they could go fast enough that it wasn't worth the risk of getting in their way, that could work. She could also just ask her grandma. That would probably be the easier option. But that would mean conceding a favor, something every fiber of her being told her not to do. Nobody wanted to leave an open-ended favor to someone with the power to use souls.

Jasmine was pretty sure that her grandma wouldn't do something like that, but she wasn't as sure as she once was, and more than that, she certainly wouldn't risk it. She wanted to be able to negotiate for more freedom. And the first part of that would be knowing something her grandma would want. Nicholas moved curling against her still asleep as a show played on the TV. She had been watching while he was still awake, but the moment he had passed out from exhaustion, the embarrassment struck. They'd have to rewind.

Was she supposed to go back to her room? What if she said she fell asleep too, so she got revenge on him, and he had to deal with it in the morning? Though Jasmine was pretty sure she usually woke up first in the mornings, even if it was followed by waiting for him to get up so he would make food. She'd learn how to cook eventually; it sounded like a good way to kill time after she got hit by a powerful attack and they would be forced to rest for months.

"God, this is so hard," Jasmine said, resting her forehead against her knees. She wondered how her grandma handled dating, since Jasmine had a lot of relatives. A lot of them. Jasmine wasn't going to ask her grandma for dating advice because that sounded horrible and it wasn't important right now but it was easier than thinking about her crush just confessed to her and she said she wasn't interested and he was now asleep against her while they sat on his bed.

Whoever had come up with this dumb soul bond dating idea was an idiot. She also couldn't remember if it was her idea or not. She was fine calling herself an idiot if it was her idea, and if it wasn't her idea, then it was certainly her being an idiot that had agreed to it, there was never going to be a non-embarrassing way for this to go. But she couldn't say she was disappointed with how things were going; it was just going to be more awkward than she wanted.

And she was glad that she hadn't waited to make Nicholas's protection rings, with the state of her soul now? That would have been substantially more awkward. Her spear was going to be a problem too; it fed off the desperation she had whenever she pulled it out, and it was twisting the weapon further. She hadn't realized it was beginning to awaken. This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

That shouldn't have been possible until the end of E, maybe D rank. But it was, though killing things way above her weight class probably helped, as did how emotional she had been constructing it. That wasn't a problem that she could solve, though, nor was it really solvable. Besides, she was on a date right now, so she didn't need to brood. She settled back in the bed, but not before changing the show to something else. As much as she was enjoying their watch, it would have been wrong to watch it on her own.

That show was supposed to be for the two of them to enjoy together. Even if she really wanted to watch ahead, Nicholas was so much better at their game of guessing the plot than she was, and she didn't want to keep losing. It wasn't fair that he was better at guessing them. Though it wasn't hard to figure out why. He had consumed more stories. Her mom hadn't been a big fan of watching movies when she could instead make sure Jasmine could swing a sword while doing a triple backflip.

Which she had never succeeded at, but she could probably do it now; super strength was great for letting you do silly things. So she could definitely do so many backflips while using a sword. Now that she was forcing herself to feel it, the exhaustion came easily. She wasn't as tired as Nicholas, but she could barely focus anymore. Or keep her eyes open for that matter. She let her eyes drift shut, listening to the show.

Nicholas was critically aware that he was not alone in his bed. The fact was staring him right in the face when he woke up. The fact was also pinning him to the bed and refusing to let go. Gate was a useful word, but it wouldn't get him out of this situation, and he had never faced a situation like this. Worse, he hadn't envisioned one either. But he was going to do his best to not bother Jasmine and not make it awkward for her. She had said she was uninterested, so he would move with that in mind.

Playroom needed a set area, and the train was moving, so he couldn't use that." Up" Jasmine was lifted into the air, and Nicholas rolled off the bed, landing quietly before letting her settle back down.

"Yeah, I'm exhausted too," Nicholas said, stretching. It was the middle of the night, which meant he should try and get back to sleep soon, but his bed was currently occupied. He'd shower and get some food, and decide where to go from there. He was ignoring their bond and, more importantly, ignoring the conversation they had before he passed out. It would have been lovely if both of them had forgotten it, but Nicholas was certain he had been the one to fall asleep first.

If Jasmine had he would have moved somewhere else to not bother her on accident. After a hot shower, he was feeling substantially more awake. He had gotten roughly eight hours of sleep, and with his superhuman physique, he would probably be good for the rest of the day and the day after if he wanted. Though he wasn't quite ready to give up sleep like some supers did. It seemed wrong.

He was willing to give up a lot of his humanity for his goals to become a hero, but losing sleep and there are some that stop eating too? At what point are you no longer human? Nicholas wasn't going to do something as foolish as turn himself into something so alien from the people he wanted to save that he couldn't understand them. Language was his gift, his muse, and brush. If he couldn't understand people, that seemed like it would be a quick way to ruin his power in a way that could never be fixed.

Nicholas would not let himself forget what it meant to be human. Even if right now things would be significantly easier if he could forget that and his feelings. He wasn't unaware that he was at best emotionally stunted and at worst crippled. You could only deal with the facts of having a poor relationship with your parents, no friends, and an obsessive need to fulfill the goal to become powers for so long. That his first friend in ages was now also becoming his first crush was irritating.

And it would be pretty hard to talk about it with anyone without giving more context than he felt like sharing. Twister could be a good choice, especially if she joins the team. Once she was a member, revealing their soul connection would probably be reasonable, though he could already hear the response. While he may have no experience in real life, he loved stories, and romance stories were warm to read. Nicholas slammed his head against the tiled wall as water cascaded down around him.

This wasn't going to get him anywhere. And the memory was already too ingrained in him so he couldn't blank it. He would just have to deal. His form of dealing was suspiciously akin to just ignoring his feelings and pretending everything was fine, which was what it was, mostly. But he wasn't ignoring his feelings, just setting them aside. More than that, he hoped any romantic feelings he felt were in their infancy enough that he could squash them if needed; Jasmine was his best friend and his partner as a hero.

Neither of those were worth breaking. Once he was certain all of his feelings were swirling down the drain along with the filth of the day, Nicholas cleaned himself before heading to the kitchen. He had not been ready to see Jasmine also there, dressed in new clothes for the day.

"Uh, hey," Nicholas said robotically, walking past her.

"Hey! We match!" Jasmine said cheerfully. And they did; they had both been wearing hoodies they had gotten as part of the demon attack in a gift basket.

"So," Nicholas began.

"So indeed," Jasmine agreed. They didn't need the bond, but it certainly helped them know that they both felt incredibly awkward about what happened. Nicholas almost made the suggestion to say it hadn't happened. Something stayed his hand, though he didn't know why.

"We still on for the dates in the next city and at least one specific dedicated hangout on the trip there?" Jasmine asked. Nicholas hated his treacherous feelings at that. But he nodded all the same, smiling even if she couldn't see it.

"Yeah, I would like that. Do you want to plan it together?"