Chương 117: Chapter 10: Dark Thoughts

With Mum's approval, I did not wait ceremoniously. Sitting down cross-legged, I breathed in and out to fall into a meditative pose, ready to access the [Vigil of Protection].

"Hold your horses, pumpkin." Mum's voice halted me.

"There is still something we need to discuss." I suppressed a groan.

"Is it about the visions?" Mum nodded. We had talked a little about how the restrictions she had put on the [Somnus's Reverie] had shattered during my breakthrough into the noble class. Now, I could use most of the relic's functions with much more freedom—perhaps even walk into the realm of dreams. However, Mum only wanted one of its functions to work: the ability to restrict my eerie visions during each step I took on the Paths.

I agreed with her that there was danger in wanton and unrestrictive uses of power we did not entirely understand. But I felt like she could be dependable with the tools I had access to. I could use the bell to restrict the visions just as well, as the seal she had placed on it would work. Mum stood up and came down to stoop next to me. She put her palm on my shoulder, and I guessed some heavy talk was coming.

"We still don't understand the visions you have experienced," she said, "but we can gauze up the danger. How awfully they could harm your mind and soul. And there is a whole another world out there we cannot even fathom. What you've seen is but sands in a vast desert." Mum, I mumbled inwardly. If you want to forbid me from entering into the dreamrealm, you should not be using words that intrigue me. But of course, I kept my mouth shut, as Mum was not finished.

"I am not going to put any more seals on the relic or restrict you any more," she continued, surprising me.

"But I hope you take the sensible option here. I'm not asking you never to venture into those visions. You may once you're stronger. So far as we understood, they are going nowhere." I frowned. Well, now she had given me a huge responsibility on my shoulders. On one side, I wanted to venture into the dreams, whilst on the other, I did not want to disappoint her. The dream realm was dangerous, all right. But even if I died there, I would always return here, only disoriented, and sometimes in pain.

But that was a little price to what... The scenes of the last vision flashed through my mind, perhaps not as vivid as they had been, but they left a bitter taste in my mouth. Back then, I hadn't had the time to dwell on the details. However, now, weeks later, it was painstakingly evident how much seeing that man in that blighted armour had affected me—the man who asserted himself as my brother, one who had a stark resemblance to the Daemon that killed so many people.

However, most horrifyingly, it gave some grounds to the suspicions I had about my rebirth. The daemons' souls were immortal, but their bodies were not. They hopped from one body to another, as none were powerful enough to host an undying soul. Perhaps I too was something like them. A gripping dread crawled into my heart at even considering the words. My expression blanched, as more bile churned in my stomach.

"Pumpkin, are you all right?" Mum's voice pulled me from the dark thoughts, her palm clasping my shoulder reassuringly. I found my palms icy cold, shaking, as I looked up at her.

"What happened?" she asked.

"You were eager to advance one moment, and then you, as if you went somewhere else."

"Nothing," I said, exhaling sharply.

"I'm fine." The air seemed to strangle its way from my throat, making the words painful.

"Mum," I said, my voice a little low.

"Maybe I should think a little before advancing." She stared at me. Despite the amiable smile, the concern in her eyes was evident.

"Is it about the visions?"

"In the morning," I said quickly, perhaps a bit too quickly.

"I'll think overnight and will decide in the morning." I stood up and carried myself to my room. I could picture my parents shooting concerned glances at my darting form, but I could not find myself worrying over that. Entering my room, I immediately lay on my bed and closed my eyes. Perhaps I was overthinking this. Yes, there were some similarities, but my existence differed from the demons.

From what I understood, they were all mad, the very power they wielded eating away their sanity for the Sin they had committed. Whereas I had felt none of that. Additionally, they were all wielders of midnight essence, which differed greatly from mine. I could guess that the very reason for my existence was likely hidden in those visions. But now, I was uncertain if I was powerful enough to find out—not when my brother might as well be a blight lord. That brought another question. The daemons were immortal.

Even after putting their lives on the line, my parents could not kill it, merely imprison it within [Ouroborus]. That gave it a high chance of my brother still being alive. I did not know what to feel about that. Some time after, Mum's voice knocked on the door, asking me to dine. I did not have the stomach to eat. But I did not want to worry her further. The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement. I used a whole minute to prep myself in the mirror before joining them.

We had chicken curry today with moha bread, one of my favourites. And I practically devoured the meal, unaware of the hunger creeping through my stomach. With my heightened attributes, it was impossible to unsee the glances my parents were shooting me. They did not quite understand what I was going through, not that I helped in voicing my concerns. I was not brave enough. The silence was stifling at the table, which was so unusual in our household.

My parents tried to start a conversation from the beginning, but finding no strong response from me, they had gone silent.

"Father, you mentioned you wanted us to visit your homeland?" I said.

"But last time you mentioned Ryon was destroyed." Father considered me, and I did my best to meet his gaze. I was uncertain what expression I gave, but at least he talked without asking any questions.

"It was destroyed," he said.

"But there is New Ryon. We built it with all our heart and passion. There are still occasional demonic incursions, more than what we face here, but it is still my home." He paused.

"You see, son, it is not the place, but the people who reside in it. Always the people, like here."

"Do you have family over there?"

"Some of them, yes," Father said, "and some friends who are as close as family to me."

"What about your parents?"

"My father died protecting our family... As for my mother," he heaved a sigh, "she was never awakened, nor immune to the common diseases as we are. But she was strong all right, strong enough to talk Father out of stupid decisions." It felt so wrong that I did not know such impactful things about his life. Father never did try to talk about himself all that much, but I felt I should know all this. Today, he felt like he was in the mood to share more.

He talked more about his homeland—the old Ryon at first, the city of Dawn—how beautiful it was when the sun rose and illuminated the land, clear blue ocean surrounding it. That had changed since they moved to establish the New Ryon.

"We built it upon a mountain range," Father explained, "which gives a natural defence against the demon infestations. Over the years, we have built walls and various defensive mechanisms so that it never meets the same fate again. And it's still beautiful, but more in a... confining way."

"But where is it, though?" I asked.

"Is it on the other side of Mount Olympus?" Father chuckled.

"No," he said.

"It is in some other place else."

"Is it like some place I have to go and experience myself?" I muttered, exchanging a look with Mum.

"Like the sanctuary?"

"Maybe."

"So when are you going to take us? Mum, have you been there?"

"I have," she said.

"To both, and it is as beautiful as your father makes it out to be. Although visiting there right now might not be the greatest of ideas."

"Yes," Father agreed.

"The only way I know is through the chasma, and you know how dangerous that place is. That's why I changed my mind. If demon incursions are proliferating here, it is far worse there."

"Actually," Mum interjected, "you have been there, though you do not remember it." We talked some more even after finishing dinner, and my mood improved steadily. By the end of the night, when I was back in my room to sleep, I had decided I would advance tomorrow morning. It mattered little what I was in my past life. This life, I would define with my actions. And if those dark thoughts still came to pass, I knew I would have my family to always encourage me, always help me through it unconditionally.

At the break of dawn, I called them to watch over me as I advanced, and they answered without question. Cursed or not, I was glad I came into this world and into this family. The [Vigil of Protection] manifested on my right wrist in a silver and golden sheen. The bracelet had evolved into a more ancient form and was not as elegant anymore. Its silver tint remained, with thick golden runes embedded in a circle.

I understood even less of its construction than when it was an artefact, but this was not the time to be fascinated with its design. Accessing the connection between myself and the relic, I chose a collection of sixty-four threads and channelled them all through into my prime seed. It was an easier endeavour flowing the path through the link.

Building them in the same composition as my aether root took more consideration; the braid needed to be even, with the exact amount of Will, concentrated to the limit that it could penetrate through my prime seed to open a path.

"It is going to hurt," Mum said.

"But, you are already familiar with that kind of pain." She was right on both ends. Despite the familiarity, the twisting agony hardly made it easier. It still urged me to surrender. It was that kind of pain that seemed to linger and even possessed the ability to stretch time—at least in my perception. My stomach contorted, my body trembling, when finally bright, glaring light flooded through me in a wild surge of essence. The choice opened before my eyes. The bell of Somnus rang in my mind as a warning.

Tentatively, I opened my gaze to look up at my parents. At this heightened state, it took focused Will to disable Fractal Sight and observe their expressions. They nodded, observing me throughout the process, prepared to assist if necessary. The remainder of the process was intrinsic. I merely had to grit my teeth through it, and perhaps even venture a trip to the dream realm. But I had already made my choice.

I mustered a smile to beam at my parents for all the gratefulness, and yanked at the Dream Warding function of [Somnus's Reverie]. The tug at my soul was very apparent, even though I had no conception of my soul yet. However, once it seemed to learn about my disposition regarding the visions, the tug calmed down. [Congratulations! You have another stride into your Path.] [You have 9 points available to empower your aspect.]"I'm finished," I told them.

"Just deciding on my aspects." The choices were rather evident. As I had already spent some points into Influence, it required no immediate empowering, which left Weight and Will. My Will was already my strongest aspect, but it was also the most crucial one, and having more Will would only help me practise more.

"5 points into Will," I said, gazing at Mum.

"Rest into Weight." Mum shrugged, saying it was my choice, whereas the Spell asked to confirm. I did, as the brilliant light surged through me. Now the relic felt much more like another limb, a supernatural one, like all my essence threads. I guessed the next thing left was to practise with its abilities. But before that, my eyes drew towards the Wheel mark on my palm to summon my Profile.

[Profile] Arilyn Arcis O'Ryon Path: Shaper (Common) Wayfarer (Noble) Honours: Prime Seed (Prestigious), Journeyman Artisan (Prestigious), Nascent Demon Hunter (Noble) Aspects: Influence: +8 (+40%) Weight: +9 (+40%) Will: +12 (+70%) Attributes [8/9]: (Unallocated Points: 18) [+30%] Arcane (Greater): +299 Adaptive Physicality (Greater): +112 Split Focus (Advanced): +84 Fortitude (Advanced): +80 HyperCognition (Advanced): +66 Uncommon Reflexes (Advanced): +99 Enhanced Aura (Advanced): +66 Agility (Elementary): +60 Gift: Fractal Soul [Fractal Sight] [Rune Imprint] =============