Chương 75: 72 - Funny Guy

The town of Ehrfeld was small, with a population of less than two thousand, including people like the Smiths who lived on farms a good distance from the town proper, but it felt like a metropolis within the confines of the main square. Jonny wasn't sure what he had been expecting when he heard the term "market day" but it wasn't this. The entire town seemed to be present, bustling around and buying, selling, and bartering.

A few dozen residents had carts or wagons full of goods set up around the outskirts of the square, while everyone else was milling about in between. Most of them didn't even seem to be buying anything. It was basically just a big social event. One one side of the square, a tavern revealed that it had removable wall panels, and the whole thing was open to the air, with extra tables set up outside.

Right next to it, there was a stage set up with a lot of younger children—probably five or younger—lined up to watch a puppet show that simultaneously looked cool and lame. It was a little cool, because they were using magical effects to enhance the performance, but Jonny had been around long enough to tell that the ones putting it on were not at all professionals. Not that the kids cared.

A few other stands all near the stage served more snack-y food, like popcorn and something that looked like funnel cake on a stick, as well as meat skewers and small pies. All of them had lines formed up behind them, an even combination of excited children and chatting parents. Children closer to Emily and Jonny's age ran around chasing each other with wooden sword and wand toys, while the older tweens and teens huddled in groups around the edges.

There were a thousand sounds, from children laughing and crying to more outgoing townsfolk hawking their wares to the discordant sound of a half dozen amateur musicians in different parts of the square playing for tiny crowds. It was much more than Jonny had been expecting and the surprise distracted him for long enough that he didn't notice when the twins slipped away leaving him and Emily alone. Bastards.

It would be a lie to say that Jonny didn't behave similarly at that age, but it didn't stop him from being annoyed now that he was on the receiving end. He couldn't even see where they had gone because everything was so busy, and he was too short to see over the crowd. With a sigh, he turned to Emily, who didn't seem bothered at all by her brothers' disappearance. He supposed this was a fairly common occurrence, and in a town as small as this one, it wasn't like she was in much danger, even if Jonny wasn't there.

"So, we just… look around?" he asked.

"Uh uh," she said, craning her neck to get a better look to the right.

"This way, I think…" It was Emily's town, so he let her take the lead, wandering vaguely to the right as she looked for… something. He wasn't sure what, but she clearly had some kind of goal in mind. The vast majority of the carts and wagons in the square were selling produce. Grains, vegetables, fruits, berries, and more. A few had live animals, like pigs, sheep, and most commonly, chickens. There was only one cow that Jonny saw, and it seemed to be a young one. A different breed than the Smiths' cows too.

The Smiths' cows were all Texas longhorns, while this one looked more like the stereotypical black and white spotted version. Emily stopped to take a look at some of these, usually the ones with cute baby animals, and the adults were more than happy to let her and Jonny play with them. Jonny had to introduce himself almost a dozen times before he even got across the square, as every single adult in the town seemed to want to know who he was and why he was with Emily.

The kids were also curious, but they were curious much in the same way that Elise had been at the tea party. They talked to him just long enough to find out that he was also a Null, then went back to whisper to the other kids. At least they were less annoying, though. They hadn't learned to hide their gossiping yet, so they just all spread the rumor and disappeared relatively quickly.

When they got to the other end of the square and turned to check the other side, Emily finally spotted whatever it was that she was looking for. Their pace increased, which had the added bonus of letting them slip between people before anyone had time to notice that Jonny was a new face and stop them to ask for an introduction. The destination was a stall that was selling a few different kinds of berries, none of which Jonny recognized.

One of them looked kind of like a strawberry, but spikier, while another looked like pink blueberries, and a third looked kind of like miniature avocados. The ones running the stall were a middle-aged couple and their older teen son, Jonny assumed. He looked young, but was tall and burly, and clearly a good degree more mature than Olivia and her friends. All three of them were locked in a conversation with an older-looking man—probably somewhere in his fifties—who was holding a basket full of berries.

The parents didn't notice Jonny and Emily approaching, but the son did, and he smiled and waved at Emily, who smiled and waved back. He held up a finger to indicate for her to wait, then nodded to Jonny and turned back to the conversation.

"…the whole farm," the older man was saying.

"Only the daughter and two cows survived."

"Oh no, that's horrible," said the woman behind the stall, putting a hand to her mouth.

"Poor girl. The hunters got it, though?"

"Yes. Isolated incident too, luckily."

"Praise the Lord," said the father manning the stand.

"This is the third one in the last few years, though," said the mother.

"I hear the hunters are recruiting."

"That they are," said the older man.

"Hoyer's boy keeps saying he'll join them." The father snorted with laughter.

"I'm sure Hoyer's thrilled."

"Well, you know how he is," said the other man with a chuckle.

"Well, looks like you've got more customers, so I'll get outta your hair. Don't forget to stop by later." The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. The man looked down at Jonny and Emily and nodded, then turned away. The parents did the same, looking slightly surprised as they noticed the kids for the first time. They did a double take at seeing Jonny's face, gave a hasty goodbye to the older man who was already walking away.

"Emily!" said the mother with a warm smile.

"It's good to see you! It's been a while!"

"Auntie Lita!" Emily stepped forward eagerly and gave the woman a hug.

"And who's your friend?"

"This is Jonny," said Emily, gesturing to him.

"He's Uncle Ollie's friend's grandson, and he's here to get Ollie's help too!"

"Oh, how wonderful!" she said.

"I'm Carmelita, and I'm Emily's aunt. You're free to call me Auntie Lita if you'd like. This is my husband Hank, and my son Ethan."

"Nice to meet you," said Ethan, holding out a hand. Jonny grabbed the outstretched hand and shook it, nodding.

"What were you talking about?" asked Emily, looking up with what Jonny recognized as an exaggerated innocent expression.

"Ah, well…" said Lita.

"It's nothing you need to worry about, dear."

"Was it another demon attack?" Lita stiffened, then sighed.

"It was. A hundred miles west of here. But you don't need to worry. The hunters took care of it, and everything is fine now."

"Who are the hunters?" asked Jonny. The other family looked a little surprised at his question, but Emily quickly came to his rescue.

"He's from Feria," she explained.

"Ah, I see," said Lita.

"The hunters are the Demon Hunters. Do you know about the inquisitors?" Better than I'd like to, thought Jonny as he nodded.

"Well, the Demon Hunters are our version of the Inquisitors. They take care of all the demon-related incidents in the country."

"Oh. Cool!"

"Very cool," said Ethan with a smile.

"They come through town once a year to do a quick check, and sometimes recruit promising talent. If you want to see them, they'll be back in a couple months."

"They're kinda scary, though," said Emily.

"True," said Ethan.

"But they don't hurt normal people. They're the good guys."

"Mhm," said Emily.

"Anyway…" She glanced over toward the berries, and the others laughed.

"Oh, so that's your real reason for coming here," said Ethan in mock surprise.

"I see how it is," said Lita with a false pout.

"You don't actually care about your poor Auntie Lita. You're just using her for her berries."

"I'm not!" protested Emily.

"I just…" She stopped as Hank, the father, tossed her a pair of small linen bags while smiling. She snatched them out of the air, turning to hand one to Jonny.

"I just wanted to show Jonny," she continued.

"It's his first market day, so I have to show him all the best spots."

"Ah, of course," said Ethan.

"Where else have you shown him?"

"This is the first place," she said proudly.

"Oh, well in that case," Hank tossed her another small bag.

"Bring his grandma here next time too, and you can have another one." Emily beamed, then moved to greedily fill them with various berries. She talked Jonny through what each of them was, having him eat one of each while she poorly described their flavor. He ended up taking away a bulging bag full of five different kinds of berries, though almost half of it were the pink blueberry-looking ones. They tasted the best, both in his and Emily's opinion.

They bade farewell to the family running the berry stall, then continued through the square. They stopped twice more as Emily introduced Jonny to a few more of her favorite people. They were not quite as generous with free produce, but they were still very friendly and kind. And notably, all adults, or at least near adults.

Not once did Emily stop to introduce Jonny to one of the other kids, and all the other kids they saw seemed more interested in watching from a distance and whispering than approaching and talking. At least until they got near the tavern and food stalls. One second, they were walking, and the next, they were half surrounded by a semi-circle of older kids. The oldest of them couldn't have been more than twelve or thirteen, but at that age, the size difference between them and Jonny and Emily was still quite immense.

The one in the middle, the obvious ring leader, stood with his arms crossed with a smug expression. Now, Jonny did not condone the hitting of children, and even when he dueled Tommy, he had been careful not to actually hurt the other boy. That said, the first word that came to mind when Jonny saw this kid's face was "punchable." He had that perfect combination of smugness and smarmy handsomeness that made Jonny want to lay him out. Not that he would ever actually do such a thing to a kid.

That was just the best way to describe him." Michael," said Emily with obvious distaste.

"I heard we had a new Null in town," said the boy, ignoring her and looking at Jonny.

"I guess that must be you." Jonny took a second to gather himself, then smiled. The kid was clearly picking a fight, while Jonny would normally fight back, he didn't want to break his 'no hitting kids' policy. Instead, he smiled.

"Oh, you must be the guy!" he said.

"The guy?" the kid asked, frowning.

"I heard there was a guy who really loved Nulls here." Jonny stepped forward and grabbed the other boy's hand, shaking it and maybe squeezing a little harder than necessary.

"Always good to meet a fan. I'm afraid that Emily and I have somewhere to be, though, so we don't have time to stay and chat. It was nice meeting you, though. Michael, right? Name's Jonny. Anyway, gotta go. C'mon, Emily." Emily jogged forward to join him as he squeezed between Michael and the boy to his side. The whole group of kids was completely taken aback by his attitude, and Jonny felt pretty pleased with himself. An incident resolved without violence, and he probably even looked pretty cool when he did it.

Then, a hand on his shoulder stopped him.

"I guess you think you're a funny guy," said Michael. The other boy was smiling, but it was no longer as smug as it had been.

"I like funny guys. Wanna see something cool? It's right down there. I only show it to the funniest guys." Michael gestured to the side, toward a narrow street that was much emptier than any of the other streets around. Jonny recognized what was going on, and realized that he had perhaps miscalculated.

"Well, Emily and I really–" started Jonny,"C'mon," said Michael, stepping forward and putting an arm around Jonny's shoulders.

"It's really cool. I promise." At this point, Jonny could have quite easily just walked away. There wasn't really anything the other kid could do if Jonny decided he didn't want to be there. But he also was pretty sure that would cause a scene, and he didn't really want to do that. Besides, he didn't really feel threatened by these guys at all. What's the worst that could happen?

"Alright, sure," he said.

"I wanna see it."

"Excellent."