Chương 281: I X Lunacy

…That's a lot of fur in my mouth. Looks like things escalated while I wasn't allowed to sense anything Why did you think I made you shut off your senses, Nara? If it were just for a little kiss, it wouldn't have been necessary–Speaking of which, she has some real sharp spines on her tongue. She could make someone choke on their blood by just giving them a kiss. I pulled on the fake tongue of my 'Gynoid Form'. It had quite a few cuts on it. Thankfully, I had actually been preparing for this…

'Event' for a little while, without letting Nara know about it, of course. I had been acting like I wasn't interested in pursuing a relationship with anyone now that I was a monster, but the experience I had in the A. R. DL, whilst I was another me, coupled with the acquisition of the 'Gynoid Form'... It all made me reconsider my stance slightly. One could say that I was quite bad at lying to myself.

I was very good at dodging topics inside of my own mind and during conversations, but if something came up inside of my own skull, I wasn't going to lie or pretend that the truth wasn't what it really was. I found it to be quite a silly thing to think about. If I couldn't be honest with myself, then was I even my own person? Or was I two different people wearing the same coat? No, even if there were lots of seemingly contradictory things about me, it wasn't because I couldn't face my own truth.

It was just because I was a human being. No matter the form I take upon, I am Mara Meave Maya Nebulo. I am still the same I always was. I am still here. In any case, the realisation that I could look the same as I used to be was the final nail in the coffin, especially when I discovered how flexible the 'Gynoid Form' truly was when it came to how it was constructed. The appearance was just a matter of making a few decisions whenever I transformed into it. Certain things could be added into the mix.

For example, the skin I possessed wasn't part of the form innately. Normally, the outer shell was a realistic-looking exterior, but ultimately a hard shell of steel. The skin was a creation of my own, imitating the invention I had come up with inside the A. R. DL to wrap my clown gals with.

Indeed, I could add 'ingredients' at the moment the form manifested, and the limits were basically that it needed to be something I had created myself, or that was otherwise infused with my negative energy, and also that it had to be something whose primary usage was cosmetic and to better 'play the part'. Hence why I had flesh in between the false skin and steel bones.

It was flesh originally harvested from my 'Base Form', which I had then modified using the equipment in the Mindscape, creating this rather realistic flesh that could mimic to near perfection that of a real person with blood pumping through their veins. With Mari's assistance, I had even come up with fake lungs and heart to even fool those who could take notice or hear such things.

It was all very useful for a disguise, but it also allowed me to not just be a hunk of steel, which was handy when you wanted to do what I had just done with Leou. The snow leopard had been a bit hesitant when I first kissed her, but only for a few brief seconds. This was what she wanted, after all. She had perhaps not expected that things would escalate as they did, but it didn't seem like she minded.

Currently, we are both lying in bed, and the beastfolk is holding onto me in sleep as if I am going to disappear into the void if she lets go… And speaking of her holding on, her claws are pretty damn sharp. She slashed quite a lot of tears into my back, which she probably didn't realise, but it was actually a good thing. My senses were very utilitarian in most cases, and some of my parts in the 'Gynoid Form' simply didn't feel anything other than pain.

Pain was something I felt pretty much constantly, and Leou would probably feel bad if I told her that her claws were incredibly painful, but I had come to accept and welcome the pain. Nowadays, if I were crushed alive as I had been in the backroom, it wouldn't be a bad experience at all for me. So I actually quite liked that Leou was completely unrestrained. She had even bitten into my shoulders and neck.

This made it quite clear that she had never been in a serious relationship before, as most people would have been dead as a result of the way she expressed her intimate affection. How odd. It's almost like we are a match made in heaven. I definitely couldn't have predicted before that my first real relationship would not only be with another woman, but with a beastfolk with a fair bit of 'beast' to them. I could hardly have imagined it, but it wasn't bad at all.

Turns out that the fluffy areas I hadn't gotten access to before were even softer than the rest. I sighed, using my fake lungs. You were right, Nara. I have tastes beyond strong and influential men. Though the main goal of being with a man had always been to start a family for me, I couldn't do this at all anymore, so I might as well go for the option where that is not even… Well, an option. You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version. I knew it from the very beginning.

It was just obvious for me–The observant little sister… I must ask, though. What about Mari? I didn't let anyone out of the Gravescape for a reason. I'm not certain how to approach the situation just yet. I'll need to talk with Leou about it when she wakes up. I know that your answer will be that I should have them both as girlfriends, but this isn't really an ideal solution, is it? Why not? They both love you.

Mari would be willing to be the least-like one of a thousand, and Leou has very clearly fallen for you very strongly. I am certain it will work out just fine Mmh… I suppose that those two are special cases, but you do realise that there is a reason why monogamous relationships are favoured far above the rest, right? They are way more stable. Just ask the fuckers in Giorsalbe with their dozens of wives, you probably can't because they've died from being poisoned or stabbed. …

If it were me, I wouldn't be too happy if my husband had any other woman in his life. I would definitely eviscerate her and have to teach him some manners. But yes, I guess Leou and Mari are… Unusual. Anyway, if we assume that they are perfectly fine with both being my girlfriends at the same time, how do you think they will deal with my little sisters, with my daughter, and with Coco? Coco is counted as part of the family? Of course, he's the family dog. I wasn't joking about that.

Didn't you see how much of a good boy he is? He plays fetch with the girls and lies at my or Xlown's feet when given the occasion to. He's a steel, shadow monster of death, but he's also just a dog, even if he's supposed to be a coyote. We're lucky he doesn't have a tongue. Otherwise, he would be licking us as well. What about Faelan? Frankly, I am a bit on the fence about him. I thought he would just be a strong and unique spectral servant, but…

He is quite endearing, and the fact that he was given a special room in the Mindscape isn't just because he is a special spirit. So far, only my little sisters have got one of these special spaces made specifically for them. So, I know that he is more than just a random servant to me, but I am not quite certain what he is exactly. I still need to figure this out. … Oh, and Leou is eating my hair in her sleep now. It was actually real hair.

I figured out how to modify chunks of meat to start growing hair, and created what are essentially wigs to go with my 'Gynoid Form'. The form can manifest hair of its own, but it is just more realistic to make my own. The 'Gynoid Form' offers everything on its own, but it is simply more effective to put in the work. It once again likens it to the 'Base Form'. In this regard, it needs to be built upon rather than left at what it originally started as. The methods were completely different, but the idea was the same.

Regardless, I am pretty sure it isn't good for anyone to eat hair. Especially not hair grown inside of a Mindscape from pieces of meat that uncontrollably grow from a steel monstrosity. I convinced the slumbering snow leopard to stop chewing on hair by caressing her fluff, which made her purr quite strongly. It was like a low rumble was coursing through my whole body. You know, Nara… I thought you would be celebrating more. Why bother celebrating something I know would happen anyway?

It was obvious that this was how things would turn out. The only question left is: Will there be more than two? There will not be more than two. More than one is already pushing it. Also, we are talking about people. We won't be collecting people to be my lovers. I am a murderer and monster, not a freak. Alright, alright… Not even that demon girl you trained a while back? I assure you that even if she used to like me in this way, it was just because she was a young runaway without anyone to rely on.

She hasn't seen me in more than twenty years. If she still loved me after all this time, then she is even more insane than Mari, and I am afraid that two lunatics wouldn't mesh together very well. … I would still like to see her again, though. I want to see how she turned out. Leou shifted position and slowly opened her eyes. I ran my finger through her hair, and she stared at me for a few seconds.

"By the gods, it wasn't a dream?"

"Pure reality, Leou""I… I can't believe the Palf bloodline ends with me" That was the only thing that seemed to worry her. Not the fact that we were both in her bed, that she had hair stuck in between her teeth, or that the threat of Lunovis was still present. None of it seemed to matter compared to the realisation that she was never going to further the Palf bloodline. I get it.

I would be quite freaked out if not for the fact that Leton was around with his monsterfolk wife, and that he had the support of the Rootriskian king, who had proven himself to be somehow capable of allowing people to have children even if their species were completely incompatible. So, I wasn't too worried about the Nebulo bloodline perishing due to my inability to continue it myself.

"Well… I guess I do have a daughter now, right?"

"Of course, and Xlown is already ready to call you 'Mama' about a hundred times in a row" Indeed, even my daughter had been trying to pair me up with Leou and Mari. It was a shame that she and Nara couldn't meet or speak together. I'm sure they would resonate quite well with one another.

"... In any case, before we resume talking about the mission and all, Leou… We need to discuss about ourselves. About the family you've just joined, and also about Mari""Oh, I don't mind, Mari" That's such… It's just so… Mari definitely isn't the only maniac. Is this why those girls fell in love with me? Because they have a few screws loose? What kind of person immediately agrees to this? We literally had our first kiss and all that business, and she isn't even a little bit possessive or resistant to the idea.

Match made in Heaven. Considering who I am, it might have been made in Hell…