Chương 78: Interlude F

2103: 12: 31: 11: 51: 22"All packed?" Kati asked as Michael carried his suitcase down the stairs. Her son, pale-skinned and red-eyed, nodded. He scanned the room.

"Sam is…?"

"She went flying," Kati said.

"I think maybe her shifter form takes some of the cognitive burden from her. I know spending time in mine helps relieve stress a lot." Outright healed her, in fact – for all that it didn't heal brain damage, mental attacks or fatigue of all kinds, her stress was always quickly soothed whenever she spent time luxoform.

"Or she just likes flying as much as the rest of us," Michael said.

"True, true," Kati said with a chuckle. She couldn't lie and say it didn't feel great to talk about masked stuff this openly. Even if her son was a villain, even if her son had killed heroes just like her, and even if the whole 'family full of masked' thing carried with it a crushing baggage… it simply felt great to have it out in the open now. They left the house and she entered the car on the driver side, opening the booth with a button underneath her steering wheel.

Michael dumped his backpack, sports bag and suitcase in the back, closed the trunk, and then went to sit next to her. Kati started the car, turned on her favorite playlist – to no complaint from her passenger, for once – and set course for the Aberdeen Grand Central. A while into the otherwise quiet ride, Michael broke his silence.

"You-" Michael swallowed nervously, "You're not going to… interrogate me or something?" Kati barely kept herself from snorting.

"About what? You and I both know the Jannacht already left Charm."

"You know I don't mean the Jannacht," he said, a scowl briefly crossing his face before his expression returned to his previous awkwardness.

"I meant, ask questions about me. About… about how I ended up this way, or why I became a… you know?" Despite the privacy of the car, it seemed admitting his villainhood in his civilian identity was a step too far. That, or he was now that much more uncertain about his villainy in the first place. It wouldn't surprise anyone to know that Kati preferred the latter.

"Was that what you and Sam talked about?" Kati asked, voice kept as gently as she could. Not that that was difficult; this was still her son, after all. Despite all. Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.

"Like you don't know," he said. And it was true; Kati did know. Although she couldn't hear everything, their conversation hadn't exactly been quiet, and she was fairly sure Sam had left the door open or something. So, Kati admitted it and nodded.

"Then let me put it like this: I doubt there is anything I have to say that Sam has left unsaid." The car quieted again, until Kati recalled something that made her scowl.

"Although, she did tell me what happened during you two's first masked encounter," Kati said. Michael tensed and braced himself like he was about to be attacked, but as nothing happened, and nothing continued to happen, the tension morphed into surprise.

"You're not going to say anything?" Oh, how a part of Kati wished she could lay into him. Get angry and yell at him for how stupid he was being, not just in endangering his sister, but for endangering a junior masked in general. That he should know better after Juezito, and hell, that he shouldn't even be a villain at all. And then she'd undoubtedly get carried away and started pushing her own failures and insecurities on him, or worse, start blaming him for how things went in the past.

Most of Kati was just sad, though. Sad about the fact that Sam had to deal with family members like them, sad about how her and Michael's relationship had grown strained, sad about how she'd all but lost her son for years and years, only to find and connect with him again too late to let it grow into something good, steady and healthy.

"You're beating yourself up hard enough for two," Kati said instead, a wry smile on her lips.

"Besides, I don't exactly have a leg to stand on." No matter how much a part of her recoiled at that admission. Putting herself on the same moral level as a villain felt wrong regardless of the fact that villain was her son. Michael snorted in self-loathing.

"Sam said much the same." Kati laughed, sharing the sentiment.

"…Are you sure you don't want to say anything?" Michael said warily.

"I mean, surely there must be something you want to say."

"And what would that be, Michael?" Kati asked, tired.

"What is there for me to say that I ultimately wouldn't regret? That I'm angry at you? Disappointed? Saddened by what you've done and continue to do? That sometimes, deep in the night, when I'm at my worst, that I hate you?" Michael winced, but Kati continued.

"Because even if all of that was true – and it's not – the one I'm most angry at, disappointed in and saddened by, the one who I hate by far the most in those times, is myself – and it's not even a close competition." Despite her calm way of saying it, Kati felt the hurt thrust deep into her gut, up her heart and down her throat. It would never go away, she knew.

Even with Sam returning, with Michael and her relationship improved, and even if Pierce somehow returned as well, and Michael decided to turn himself in, or became a vigilante again, or a hero somehow, or threw down the mask for good; this feeling, this self-hatred, she knew, would remain. It'd been at the core of her for far too long to so easily disappear. Eventually, the car reached their destination.

Michael and Kati stepped out, Kati helped Michael unload his luggage and then they stood there, together on the side walk in the winter cold with neither knowing where to start. But Kati knew there was one thing that needed to be said.

"Regardless of… everything, remember that I love you, honey, and that I always will. You know that, right?" she said. Michael looked away, not out of some form of embarrassment but something much more self-conscious. Kati continued.

"And that no matter what you do, I would do anything to help you. But if there is anything I've learned from all those years, it's that you first need to help yourself before you can accept the help of others." There. That was all she could say without feeling hypocritical, and without pushing too hard. Michael, after a brief moment, nodded, but ultimately said nothing. Kati sighed.

"Have a nice journey, alright? And message me when you get home."

"I will," Michael said.

"And call more often, okay?" she said, seizing the moment.

"Even if we can't keep it civil, it's just nice to hear your voice once in a while." He groaned, but relented.

"Fine."

"And again, if you ever, no matter the why or how, need my help, be it financial or personal or anything else; know that I'm always one call away." He sighed.

"Yes, I know."

"And-""Yes, yes, I know okay!" he said, exasperated.

"God…" Kati smiled, then went in for a good, strong hug. One Michael, to her delight, returned full-heartedly. Eventually however, it had to end.

"Stay safe," Kati said. Michael nodded, said, "You too," picked up his bags, and headed back to New York.