Chương 44: Chapter 43-Chosen Brother

The snow never stops, and why would it? It's not like I'm trying to eat a pretzel outside or anything. Yeah, I like the snow. It doesn't bother me or chill me to the bone for even a second.

"Why are we out here again?" Mateo asks in the language of the Sands as he munches down on a pretzel.

"You really don't listen, do you?" I ask back.

"Not when you're speaking," he says with a stone-cold look that would put this winter to shame.

"As your 'brother,' I've taken you out on a brotherly outing. As your partner, I've taken you out to show that we are 'brothers'. Can't have the people in the church thinking something is fishy about us," I say as I tear another piece out of the pretzel.

"Yeah, the people of the church definitely don't think there's anything fishy about a Horned one and a Magena. What could be fishy about us?" he asks sarcastically.

"Is it me, or have you gotten more snarky on me? You sure weren't acting this way with the Holy Maiden."

"Shut it." I let out a hearty laugh.

"Just teasing you, Kid. Anything you want to do?" I ask as I [Throw] the wrapper into a nearby garbage can. Mateo munches on his pretzel for a bit.

"Teach me how to steal like you do," he says, staring at me with conviction.

"What brought this on?"

"If things go bad, I'd like something to fall back on," he says. He's not wrong. If anybody ever finds out I'm not The Chosen One, it'll end badly for him as well. I guess it wouldn't be the worst idea to teach him a thing or two.

"Fine, but you'd better listen to everything I say." Mateo nods his head enthusiastically.

"I'll listen to everything you say, Horned One."

"Okay. First, I need to teach you the Code," I say as I take a pebble out.

"The Code? I thought you were going to teach me how to steal. What gives?"

"I thought you were going to listen. What gives?" I ask back.

"Fine. What's the Code?" he asks begrudgingly. With a devilish smile, I answer,"The Code is what you live by if you're a thief like me. Different thieves have different codes, but they're all shit. The one I'm going to teach you is the best one around, okay?"

"Uh-huh."

"Good. First and most important rule of the Code. Don't get caught. No matter what happens, you don't get caught. It's not even an option. Got it?" I ask, gauging his reaction.

"I get it," he says haphazardly. I let out a sigh and look around the street.

"Ok, Kid. Look around and tell me what you see. Focus on the people." A question forms on his face before he stops himself and begins to look around.

"There's an Elf in the corner buying some bread from a Human. A small family of three Beastkin playing in the snow. A Dwarf shoveling the snow. What am I supposed to see here?"

"You already saw it, Kid. This is the capital of the largest Empire in history. Here you can find every type of mortal under the sun, excluding the forces of evil, of course. Do you notice anything?" I say, trying to lead him to the answer.

"Is it the smiles on their faces or maybe the nice clothes they're wearing? Just tell me, Horned one."

"Do you see anybody like us?" I ask as I [Steal] his pretzel. A long silence falls over him.

"No. Not a single one," he whispers.

"Kid, I don't want to make you sad, but you gotta wake up to the reality that we're alone here. Which is why Rule One is Rule One. For people like us, getting caught doesn't mean jail time. So, what's Rule One?" I ask as I take a bite of his pretzel.

"Don't get caught. No matter what," Mateo says with a different look in his eyes.

"Good. Now, Rule Two. We only steal from those who can afford it or from those who deserve it."

"I didn't take you for a moral person." I let out a wry chuckle as I gesture over to the family of Beastkin.

"Why wouldn't we steal from that family?"

"I assume the answer you're looking for isn't because it's wrong," he says as he looks around for his pretzel.

"You're catching on. Yeah, it would be 'wrong', but stealing isn't usually a 'good' thing anyway. The answer I was looking for is that they would notice. If you steal even a copper from someone who relies on every single coin they get, they will notice, and they'll go looking for their coin. Basically, it's not worth the hassle, and I guess it's wrong. Who would you steal from?" I ask as I gesture to our surroundings.

A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation. Mateo thinks for a second before pointing out an Elven maid who is out shopping.

"Her." With a devilish smile, I ask,"And why is that?"

"She's a maid for a nobleman. She probably has coin that was given to her for shopping. She won't notice a missing coin, and if she does, she'll probably think she dropped it. No one will even know it happened," he explains.

"There may be hope for you yet, Kid. Although you missed one important thing. That's no normal maid. See the red and blue pendant on her chest?" I ask.

"The one with the deer on it? Yeah, what about it?" he asks.

"That's the crest of the Imperial family. Therefore, that's an Imperial maid. It's best to steer clear of the royals if we can. Too much of a hassle," I say as an image of Penelope crosses my mind.

"Hmm. Okay. Is there another rule to this Code?" he asks with impatience lacing his every word.

"I'm glad you asked. There's one more. Rule Three. Don't hurt people if you don't have to. We're thieves, not thugs." I say, remembering a sour memory.

"Ok. So, don't get caught, steal from those who deserve it, and don't hurt people if you don't have to. Is that all of them? Will you teach me how to steal now?" he rattles off.

"Yeah, that's all of them. You can add personal ones as you get older. I sure did," I say, letting out a sigh, "Where to start? Hmm. Ok, watch and learn." With expectant eyes, Mateo watches as I stand up and walk towards the Elven maid. Yeah, I'm a hypocrite, so what? Not messing with royals was more of a… suggestion for Mateo, but not for me. The Elven maid looks over a bread stall as she hums to herself.

"Lovely assortment of bread, isn't it?" I ask as I look over the subpar bread. The Elven maid glances over at me with her sky-blue eyes.

"It is. My pleasure to meet you, Chosen One," she says with a slight nod.

"The pleasure's all mine, uh… Sorry, have we met before?" I ask.

"Only in name. I am Alfira Tritco, the personal maid of Princess Penelope. Thank you for taking care of her," she says with a calming tone.

"Of course. She's saved my life once or twice now. It's only natural that I repay the favor. Are you shopping for her?" I ask as I palm a cookie in my hand.

"Yes, the Princess has a fondness for baked goods, especially the ones from this stall," she says as a man hands her a bag of bread.

"Oh, it's falling there a bit," I say as I grab the bag. In the small window of distraction, I [Steal] a small baked good and replace it with the cookie that I had cupped in my hand.

"Ah, thank you. Well, if you'll excuse me, the Princess is waiting. Have a good day," Alfira says with a slight nod before walking away. Skill <Steal> has Leveled Up It's been a while since that happened. Hmm. I think I need to start [Stealing] more. I miss the taste of it. Sitting down next to Mateo, I toss him a baked good.

"So, managed to see all that?" Mateo takes a bite out of the bread and nods.

"It was quick, but I managed to get the gist. Draw their attention with one hand, and with the other, you steal. I think I'm ready," he says with the confidence that only a child could have.

"Oh, no, you're not. We're going to start small," I say as I gently [Throw] a couple of pebbles his way.

"What am I supposed to do with these?"

"Simple, Kid. It's hard to take something from someone without them noticing. It's harder to put something there. One is a crime, the other isn't. So, I want you to take these pebbles and practice putting them into people's pockets without them noticing. Once you're good enough at that, we'll move on to the next step," I say as I start to walk back to the cathedral.

"How long is that going to take?" he asks as he scarfs down the last of the bread. Tapping my horn, I think.

"It took me half a year. It'll probably take you a full year," I [Lie].

"What?!" The largest yawn escapes me as I wipe the sleep away from my eyes. This is what I get for not sleeping. I like sleeping. Why didn't I sleep? Simple, I was perfecting the Dark Orchid poison. I realized that it wasn't my cooking that was the problem. It was the poison. It was just too potent. Now that I've made it weaker, I should be able to create the perfect cookie to beat that muscly jerk.

"CJ, you okay? You look really tired," Hopper says as we walk through the Whisperwood Forest.

"Don't bother with him, Hopper. He was probably out gallivanting. Doing who knows what," Penelope says with a tad bit more anger than usual. Wonder what I did to piss her off. It could literally be anything. So, let's not dwell on it.

"If you must know, I was preparing for the Bake-off against Cliff. Which I'm going to easily win," I say as another yawn escapes me. Penelope rolls her eyes at the mention of the Bake-off.

"I don't know, Charlatan. Cliff does have [Cook] of which you do not."

"What makes you think I don't have [Cook]? I could have it. In fact I do," I [Lie].

"Sorry to break this to you, but your cookies are good. Just not at the level of [Cook] good," she says with a haughty attitude. With a shocked face, I look over at Hopper, who averts my gaze.

"Hopper, tell me this isn't true. You like my cookies, don't you?"

"Sorry, CJ, but there's a noticeable difference. Maybe he just has a higher [Level] in [Cook] than you," he says, trying and failing to comfort me.

"You fools. You don't understand. I haven't unleashed my full potential in cooking yet. Just watch. I'm going to bury him… using the best cookies I can make," I say dramatically. Penelope lets out a sigh.

"Why did you even pick this fight to begin with?"

"I didn't pick it," I say as I munch on one of my cookies.

"Wait, you didn't create the attack ads against the Cooking club?!" she asks with a hint of surprise.

"No, why would I? I'm busy doing other things. Plus, have you seen those ads? I would've come up with something better than 'The Cooking club suxs and is in league with the forces of evil.' The fact you even thought I did it is honestly insulting," I say as I spot the entrance to the Dungeon.

"Why did you accept the challenge then?!" she asks, utterly flabbergasted.

"He insulted my cookies. I have pride, you know." Hopper sighs as he leans against the Dungeon entrance.

"I can't believe it took us the entire class to find this thing again," he says, hoping to change the subject. Penelope shakes her head.

"Some Dungeons have a will of their own. If they don't want to be found, they won't be."

"Well, that's unless you're The Chosen One like me," I gloat.

"All you did was walk in a random direction, Charlatan, and that was after I suggested you do it."

"Was it a random direction or was it the path we were meant to follow?" I wax lyrically. Hopper shakes his head at the sight of us bickering as the light of Professor Stargazer's magic envelops us.