Chương 109: A WOMAN'S HAIR IS HER LIFE

Harvey sent Savy home before heading out of pack lands to collect papers. He said he had to get clearance at the pack house anyway. Savy popped into the house like a breath of fresh air. I, for one, was stuck here for the past few hours while Mum organized the kitchen. I ended the game I was playing on my new phone and collected my rewards for completing the quests.

"You look like you had a good day," I observed.

"Of course." Savy grinned.

"I had Beta Harvey chauffeur me to and from school today." Uh huh.

"Sam wants to cut her hair," Mum came out of the kitchen to inform Savy.

"WHAT? YOU ABSOLUTELY CANNOT CUT YOUR HAIR!" Savy shouted. What just happened?

"It's just hair. It'll grow back," I tried to reason.

"I don't know what to do with all this hair, and I trip over it a lot. And..." Why am I defending myself to my little sister?

"No." Savy stuck her head out.

"But..." I started.

"I need to go to school tomorrow." Why am I letting my little sister boss me?

"Sam, you need to rest," Mum said.

"Dad said I could," I said. Mum sighed exasperated.

"What's wrong with the hair you wore to school today?" Savy wanted to know.

"What's wrong with just cutting it off?" I wanted to know."'Cause it's beautiful like this, Sam," Savy said.

"I look like a freak," I said.

"Everyone keeps staring at me."

"You look beautiful," Mum told me.

"You're just biased, Mum," I grumbled.

"Did you know the kids at school thought I was a warlock?" I asked Savy. Savy cackled loudly at that.

"Well, warlocks are supposed to be unnaturally beautiful."

"And male... at least I got the unnatural part down," I sulked.

"Listen, Sam, a woman's hair is her life," Savy told me. I looked at her. That was just the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

"I'm just keeping it because I promised Dad, but come next Saturday, I'm chopping it all off," I promised myself.

"No, you won't," Savy said, "because I'm going to make sure you love it by the end of the week." Savy sounded so sure, but I could not see a single possibility of that happening. Not a one. {Delta approaches} True to his word, Delta Simon came straight after his rounds at the hospital to check on me. He looked startled when he saw my new human form.

"Who are you, and where is Sam?" he asked me good-naturedly. Savy disappeared up the stairs. Mum offered Delta Simon tea and a seat.

"How is she today, Luna?" he asked her.

"She was a little unstable earlier today but has since calmed down," Mum told him. I was so not unstable. That was my usual self.

"I just wanted a haircut," I told Delta Simon. He was listening to my heartbeat or whatever, and then he snapped his fingers right in front of my face. Grrr... rude.

"Hmm, good. Reflexes check out. Her wolf..." He looked squarely at me. What? What about my wolf? You want a piece of me, Delta? Delta chuckled and raised his hands in surrender.

"Wolf is strong, very much present. Calm without provocation," he told my Mum. I crossed my arms and sulked. Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere. Of course my wolf was awesome. I didn't need him to come and tell me that.

"So, Sam, why do you want to cut your hair?" he asked me.

"It's heavy when I tie it up, and I keep tripping over it when I don't. Plus, it keeps getting caught on things. It's going to use up my favorite shampoo in no time. Not to mention that I won't be able to fight with it, and it's a weird color that catches a lot of unwanted attention. It'll be easier for me to move around on my own if I could blend in a bit at school and on the train," I told him.

"Plus, tomorrow I have archery lessons, and all this would just get in the way." I sighed impassively.

"I've got things to do! I can't just sit around and look pretty and play computer games!"

"Hm, that sounds reasonable. Why don't you?" Delta Simon asked me. Eh? Really? He agreed?

"Dad made me promise not to get it cut on my own," I told him.

"Well, that sounds very reasonable too," Delta Simon agreed. I felt slightly annoyed. Whose side was he on anyway? Don't just agree with everybody!

"Have you experienced sudden bouts of tiredness or lethargy today?" Delta Simon asked me.

"Mostly boredom," I answered. His question caught me off guard.

"I did sleep in the morning, though."

"How did you feel when you woke up?" he asked.

"Pretty good," I said.

"Have you experienced any disorientation today? For example, feeling unable to follow a normal conversation?" he asked. Like right now? Was this supposed to be his idea of a normal conversation? I carefully answered, "No more than usual."

"I see. How about not remembering where you were or whether you were in wolf form or human form, or not being sure if you are awake or dreaming?" I stared at him.

"Is that a bad thing?"

"For some people, yes," Delta Simon chuckled.

"Evidently, not you." I shrugged.

"I'm really fine. I could've stayed at school." Delta Simon nodded again. He was so agreeable today.

"Seems that way, but better safe than sorry. I heard that your investiture as the future Alpha is coming up." What's with the sudden change of topic?

"Congratulations, Sam. Or should I say, Alpha Sam?" Delta Simon was still jovial. Was he testing something?

"Thank you," I answered automatically, polite because that was just how I was brought up. He hadn't turned to my Mum or said anything about me checking out okay yet, so I was almost sure it wasn't over.

"But I'm not sure if you are cut out for it," Delta Simon told me. He's lying. My wolf bristled. He's lying to us.

"You're just a girl, after all. I'm sure many people have told you that. I think you are more suited to be the Luna." Delta Simon started to sound more believable after a while. But he was still lying. His face was turning red, and I could hear his breathing was irregular. Just a bit.

"You're lying," I told him.

"Ah, well, I need to make you angry," he told me.

"How angry?" I asked him.

"Very angry," he told me. I looked at my Mum. She shrugged helplessly at me.

"I don't think you want to see me very angry," I told him. Dad came home then. He was early tonight. Mum went to greet him and excused herself to start dinner. Dad sat where she had been.

"Delta Simon needs to make me angry," I told Dad.

"That can't be hard," Dad said nonchalantly. I shot him a hard look. What's that supposed to mean?

"Unfortunately, I hadn't been successful," Delta Simon confessed.

"That's because you're a terrible liar," I told him.

"Well, I was not exactly trained for it," he admitted. I laughed at that. Then my dad took out a dagger from the side of his boot, grabbed my thick braid of hair, and in one swift motion cut my hair from its base. My hair was cut. I was furious.

"Dad!" Grrrr.... Mum ran out of the kitchen. Savy came out of her room but watched from a safe distance behind the banisters. Delta Simon paled at the Alpha dominance, but he managed to say, "Alpha Sam, I need you to stay calm."

"Dad! Why did you cut off my hair?!" Grrrr... I was angry all over again.

"Alpha Sam, I need you not to shift," Delta Simon told me. Why the hell did he think I would shift?

"Mum! Dad cut off my hair!" I complained to Mum, then I turned back to my dad.

"Don't you know a woman's hair is her life?"

"It'll grow back," my dad said calmly. I know. And I still do think that line was just dumb, but my hair was... I had no idea what it was like now.

"I can't go to school like this!" I told Dad.

"Well, then we didn't need to make you angry," Delta Simon said.

"We were just testing your control."

"My control is fine. It's my hair that is ruined!" I burst into tears. I was so mad.

"Dad, what were you thinking?"

"It looks fine," Dad told me.

"Mum!" I howled. For a moment, Dad had the slightest tinge of remorse flicker in his eyes, but his face was mostly expressionless now.

"All right, it'll be fine." Mum had found a pair of scissors and came to soothe me. She rubbed my back.

"I'll have it fixed up in no time."

"Yes, you did want to cut your hair, didn't you?" Delta Simon asked. He wrote a medical cert to excuse me from school for today.

"Looks like you'll be able to go to school tomorrow." Grrrr... in what way did my hair look like it was able to go to school?

"No! I want medical leave until my hair grows back!" Dad had the gall to laugh. After my Mum finished cutting off the loose strands, I slunk into my bedroom. Savy came in with me, and we lay on the bed side by side and stared at the ceiling. Harvey came by with homework, but I refused to see him. Luckily, Mum took care of it while I took a shower and cried like something had died. And then I got over it. Crying wasn't going to change anything, and it was a terrible haircut. I needed to work with what I've got.

And I think the only way to carry off terrible haircuts was to act like you couldn't care less. So I did my homework. And then I went down for dinner. And I pretty much acted like I didn't care. And for the most part, I didn't. My head felt lighter. I only needed half a squirt of shampoo when I showered. And as long as I didn't see my reflection, I easily forgot about my hair. At bedtime, Mum came to check on me.

"Your dad loves you very much," she told me.

"I know." I shrugged and gave Mum a small smile.

"It was just hair. It'll grow back." And even as the words left my mouth, I knew it was true. Whatever my hair, I'm still me. I didn't even need hair to be an Alpha. Dad had always been known to be radical, so this wasn't entirely out of his character. That's why he was the one who understood me most when my wolf started to emerge. Because we were both very merged with our wolves. My dad's training and technique in control gave us a strong merger with our wolves.

That's why my dad could go King Kong even in human form, using the strength, speed, and agility of his Alpha wolf. That's why I could use my Alpha dominance even before I shifted. I was already merged with Wolfie's power. But this kind of merging had its own costs. For one, our human bodies, not meant to run or fight at wolf speeds and strengths, could be severely damaged. For another, we were not always able to separate our own minds from our wolves.

For us, our wolves were not separate beings from ourselves, simply another expression. Just as he understood me, I understood him too. Hair would grow back. But the freedom to go to school, hang out with friends, learn a new skill, and travel safely and independently was something that was worth cutting off any leash for — even if the leash was your own beautiful hair.