Chương 27: First Steps

Jonathan sat in the waiting room on the fifth floor of the Hunters Association building. The floor had been turned into an emergency treatment center for Awakened. He was doing his best not to fidget in the small chair. Two other Awakened waited nearby: a young woman with a bandaged hand and a man whose leg constantly bounced. A door on the other side of the waiting room opened, and a woman stepped out. She looked younger than he expected for a doctor but a bit older than most of the other Awakened he'd seen.

She wore professional clothes, and her blonde hair was pulled back into a neat bun.

"Mr. Reeves? I'm ready for you." He met her at the door, and she held out her hand to shake. When he did, they moved through the sterile hallways and past a large number of offices, most of them empty.

"My name is Dr. Lee. It's a pleasure to meet you. I hope you weren't waiting too long." Her office smelled like cleaning supplies and fresh coffee. He saw a steaming mug next to her keyboard and looked around the rest of the room. Unopened boxes lined one wall, and framed certificates leaned against the other, waiting to be hung. She gestured to a comfortable-looking chair across from her desk.

"Please have a seat. I apologize for the mess," she said as she sat in her chair.

"I'm still getting settled in. I understand Director Hayes pulled me on specifically to work with you. I'm happy to be here and think that this is something that will go a long way for helping Awakened cope with the changes in the world… and hopefully prevent them from running into situations without the proper support." Jonathan nodded.

"He mentioned you had a lot of experience working with veterans before this."

"Yes, primarily with PTSD and combat stress." There was a pause as she searched his face and then looked at his posture. Her face softened.

"I want to start by building a bit of trust here. I've read your file, Mr. Reeves. I know that you've recently lost your son, and I can't even imagine the pain that must cause you. I've helped many soldiers through the grief of losing a comrade and even some spouses through the loss of their husbands… but it wasn't until recently that I experienced something like this myself. One of my best friends recently died in a Rift." She looked down at her desk for a moment. Jonathan's jaw tightened.

He didn't want to talk to people about Marcus, but he knew that it was the entire point of him being there with Dr. Lee. She's attempting to be vulnerable and find common ground. There wasn't pity in her tone, just a mutual understanding and it was the only thing that kept him from shutting down the feelings immediately.

"I'm sorry to hear that. My son is a large reason why I want to work for the Hunters Association and close the Rifts." Doctor Lee nodded and gave a brief smile.

"Yes, and I understand that those feelings of loss and anger likely led to you getting your unique trait. I think that with my experience, combined with my own trait, I think I might be able to help you manage your {Rage} more effectively."

"I don't want you to feel over-pressured to share since this is our initial session. Instead, I'll tell you a bit about myself, and then we can discuss how we can keep progressing in our upcoming sessions. Does that work for you?" Jonathan nodded and let out a breath that he'd been unconsciously holding.

"Well, I have a cat. I grew up in Jersey and still live there, though I'm planning to spend a lot more time down here with my new position. I have worked as a Veterans Affairs Behavior Health Therapist for the last five years. I only recently awakened as a part of my offer to join the Hunters Association. My trait seems quite helpful in my line of work. It allows me to see someone's 'aura.' This is a shape of color around you and everyone else that I can see. Everyone seems to change and constantly fluctuate.

Your aura is much larger than the others I've seen so far, which is to be expected with your reported level. I tell you this because I don't want you to feel like our conversations are overly invasive. I can't read thoughts in any way, though as a person's emotions and thoughts shift, I can usually see changes in their aura. Does that make sense?" Jonathan nodded.

"What does mine look like?" She smiled at him, clearly happy that was the first thing he asked, rather than a more drastic reaction at the unintended intrusion.

"Yours is the color of red clay. So a dulled or muddy color of red. Is that maroon? Either way, that's the color, and it seems like you're very in control of your emotions right now. While the volume of your aura is larger than most, the edge is where I normally see the most change in conversations. Rather than hazy or wobbling, yours has a solid and stable edge to it."

"Wow, that's unbelievable," Jonathan said. He thought about how crazy something like that would have been to hear just two months ago. However, at the moment, he didn't doubt her words in the least.

"So, other than in the moment, how does that help with therapy?"

"Well, it gives me an insight into how you might be really feeling beyond what you would say or show through body language. When you mentioned your son a few minutes ago, I saw a fracture splinter down the left side of your aura, like hairline cracks in glass." She paused, watching his reaction.

"But when you talked about working for the Association and closing Rifts, those cracks filled with purpose." If you spot this story on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation. He considered the information. It made sense, having someone who could actually see what the emotions and {Rage} were doing to him. Jonathan also knew that he wasn't the best at expressing his emotions, so having someone who could read them without him needing to articulate them might be helpful. Or very frustrating…

"You mentioned talking about what our sessions would look like?'

"We can start small. We'll start with learning to recognize triggers and developing coping mechanisms. I've worked with veterans who struggled with anger issues before, though I think your situation will be unique if your trait begins to feed those feelings or takes over your ability to rationalize things." She pulled out a notepad.

"Would you mind if I asked you some questions about how the {Rage} feels in normal situations when you're not fighting?" Jonathan felt himself tensed and intentionally rotated his shoulders backward while nodding.

"It's there, but it feels like it's a way down deep. All I'd need to do is throw it some bait, and it would surface."

"I can see that tension in your aura now." She made a quick note before sliding it to the side.

"Let's try something simple. Humor me here. Take a deep breath, hold it for four counts, then release it slowly. Let's do it a few times together." This is ridiculous. But he did it anyway.

"Interesting. Your aura smoothed out there for the last two repetitions." She gave him a genuine smile.

"That's the kind of thing we can work with." They spent the last fifteen minutes of the session discussing basic scheduling and expectations. When the doctor stood to leave, Jonathan stood with her and walked to the door. She stopped at the door and held it open for him.

"It was great to meet you, Mr. Reeves."

"You as well, Doctor Lee."

"Please, call me Sarah. Thank you for your service. Both in the military and now with the Rifts. What you're doing matters." Jonathan paused, caught off guard by her sincerity. He never quite knew how to respond to people thanking him for his service. It wasn't something he'd ever done for the thanks.

"Thank you," he managed to say awkwardly. Making his way toward the elevator, he was surprised to note that he felt lighter than when he'd arrived, even though there hadn't been any sort of revolutionary breakthrough. When he arrived, he'd felt tired and was dreading the idea of laying back on a couch and spilling his feelings to a stranger. Now he felt relaxed and slightly refreshed.

He was excited to meet with David for lunch and celebrate his finishing of the mid terms he'd been stressing about before winter break. Two hours later, Jonathan sat across from David at a small Vietnamese restaurant near Union Station. His son had arrived on the train from New York and looked tired but happy to be finished with his schoolwork for a bit. The place was busy with the lunch crowd, but their corner table felt private enough.

"So, how'd the tests go?" Jonathan asked, stirring his pho.

"Good, I was worried about Organic Chemistry. I think I managed to get a high B, though." David shrugged, a gesture that reminded Jonathan so much of Emma it made his chest tight.

"My friend Kevin kept freaking out because he didn't believe that you were the Crimson Warrior until he saw you on the news." Jonathan grimaced.

"Still not used to that name. It sounds so…"

"Lame?" Jonathan paused with the noodles halfway raised to his mouth. They looked at each other and both burst into laughter at the same time.

"Yes, lame. I swear, if they ask me to wear some red tights, I'm going to quit so fast." Jonathan smiled as the goofy banter caused David to laugh even harder.

"They are preparing me for some speech, though. Have you heard about this internet person who is going to try to go into a Rift in a few days?' David slurped his noodles and nodded energetically.

"Mhmm, Matt mentioned that. Also, it's called an influencer, Dad, come on." He laughed.

"You're not that old. You've got to do this stuff intentionally. But yes, Taker is a huge influencer and has spent millions to promote this as an event. He's gotten a deal with Netflix to live stream it, not to mention that he'll likely be streaming it on his normal platforms."

"Do they not know that electronics don't work in there? It seems stupid to treat this as some sort of kid's game." He frowned unintentionally, thinking about how Marcus's entire unit had been killed because they entered a midlevel E Rank Rift.

"I don't know. I'm sure they've done some research. I don't watch those guys very often; they do some really stupid stuff, and I'm just not into it. Why do you ask?" Jonathan shrugged.

"I guess that the Hunters Association is anticipating it not to go well. They've tried to reach out and offer aid but are constantly rebuffed by lawyers or radio silence. They want me to prepare for some big speech if it does go horrible and people decide to riot."

"Riot? That seems drastic… Rifts have been talked about for a month or so now. I don't think people would freak out, right?" Jonathan grunted and looked down at his noodles. In the last decade, he felt that people were generally so unhappy and immature that they were willing to blame their problems on others and riot or protest at the first sign of something they disliked. They soon fell into a comfortable silence, both focusing on their food.

It wasn't the awkward tension that had defined their relationship for the past few years. Something had shifted since their reconciliation, even though Jonathan wasn't quite sure how to navigate it yet.

"I, uh, had my first therapy session today," Jonathan said unprompted. He surprised himself with his admission, realizing that he wouldn't have mentioned it a month ago.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. The Association brought someone in. She seems capable."

"That's good to hear, Dad. Therapy is cool now, you know?" Jonathan raised an eyebrow, and David smiled in response.

"Seriously, that's great. Is she also Awakened? Does she have some crazy doctor powers?" He nodded.

"She does, but before you go and get any ideas, hear me out. The Association made me an offer. I'm currently with them as a sort of contract or temp. They want to bring me on to be a permanent member and everything that entails. They want us to set us up in a house nearby, and they're offering to cover your college expenses." He paused while watching his son's reaction.

"They also mentioned supporting you if you decide to awaken." David's eyes widened.

"You'd be okay with that?"

"It's your choice," Jonathan said.

"I trust you to make the right decision for yourself. You're a smart and capable man now, David, not the boy that I need to make decisions for. It's my role now to support you however I can." The smile that spread across David's face reminded Jonathan of when his son was younger. Before the arguments about college versus the military had started. Before everything had started to go downhill. He felt his heart swell with happiness and pride.

"Thanks, Dad," David said. The words were simple, but he could feel the sincerity behind them. They spent the rest of lunch planning David's winter break. They both knew that things weren't perfect or completely healed, but they were finally moving in the right direction.