Chương 101: Chapter 100: Duty II

"You've told me you would fight if you had to," Serena said, "but that isn't what I'm talking about. Often, the best defence is a good offence. Sometimes the path that minimises suffering is one that might require you to proactively harm others before they can harm you or those you care about. I need to know if you're willing to fight."

"I…" Amelia began, trailing off as the seriousness of Serena's expression hit her. Right. This was serious. Serena had approximately three hundred souls on the Vengeance to manage, and the accessibility of Amelia's capabilities was an unknown that her rational and pragmatic girlfriend needed to unravel.

"The way I understand it," Serena continued, "is that you're willing to fight to protect those you care about. You fought Korvus to save my life, and you fought those two Speakers in Kenhoro to protect me and Lord Yulan." Serena smiled softly, her lips curling.

"I'm not telling you to join the navy, nor am I telling you to become some kind of mercenary or run off to the human continent and wage war. Nor am I going to suggest anything that violates the political arrangement regarding your avoidance of future battlefields. What I need to know is if you'll follow my instructions."

"Instructions?" Amelia asked.

"To fight," Serena answered.

"And everything that comes with it. Healing, hurting, warding, and yes…" Serena tapped the table with her fingers.

"Sometimes killing. When you fight, there is death. There are people out there, demons and humans alike, who will want to hurt you. They will want to hurt those you care about. These people cannot be healed out of their mindset. Sometimes…" Serena's eyes narrowed as she paused.

"The only thing left to do is to fight."

"But…" Amelia waved a hand.

"I can just put them to sleep, or wrap them in stone, or—""Right, you can do all those things. And sometimes, perhaps even often, that will be the best course of action. But there will be situations where those actions only delay the inevitable. Whether you kill a darkblade that's attacking you, or put them to sleep only for them to be hanged later, the only difference is whose hands carry out the act." Serena sighed and placed her hands flat on the table.

"I'm asking for an agreement between me and you, where I know I can rely on you to do what's necessary, if needed. Not only in defence, but also in proactive offence."

"Why… why now?" Amelia asked.

"I thought you were comfortable with the fact that I wouldn't be throwing myself into battle. We both agree I don't have the mindset of a soldier."

"I realised it earlier. Your personality makes you unpredictable, and unpredictability in an engagement can cause people to be hurt. You offered your services as a Speaker to fight the Indefatigable, and I accepted. It made me understand that I need to know exactly how far you're willing to go so that I can command on and off the ship as effectively as possible. Also, if you have to kill someone in the future, I want your mind to be prepared for that.

I don't want you to be caught out by losing someone, resulting in you losing control." Serena raised one hand.

"The person who swears against harm and violence will struggle when they have to take a life, however"—she raised the other hand—"the person who is prepared to kill, and avoids it where and when they can, will cope much better when they have to do what is necessary."

"I mean… well…" Amelia sighed.

"I guess, but,"—she shrugged—"it's hard for me to be enthusiastic about it, understand?" Amelia didn't know what words to use. Rationally, she understood that if she had no other choice, she would probably take another life to protect Serena. She'd do it to protect Mel, or Tomes, or any other individuals on a long list of names. Even with that conclusion in mind, it was difficult to say it.

"I'm not going to use you like a weapon, Amelia," Serena said, her forehead frowning.

"I just need you to be prepared to act in a situation where causing harm is the only way to prevent harm. An enemy Speaker might be resistant to your sleep spells, and they might be planning to attack Officer Bright or any other number of your friends. Instead of you passively waiting for them to move first, so you can act in defence, I want you to be prepared to engage the enemy proactively. It's situations like that I want you to trust me with. I won't ask lightly, but I might ask.

It might help for you to think about what you're fighting for. Your goal."

"My goal?"

"The one you shared with Miss Volkova when you met her after the award ceremony." Ah, that goal. As she recounted the moment, Polina's voice came to mind. And… Your great goal is… what? Polina had asked. Demons and humans living in peace? Mmm! Amelia had replied. Seems like a worthy ideal, doesn't it?

"Your difficulty in mentally preparing yourself to take another life is likely because you're concerned that the action itself, or the fighting itself, is pointless." Serena shook her head.

"But it's not pointless. You fight for the protection of those you care about, and you fight for your goal, your duty. It's an ambitious duty, and one that many will oppose. Change does not come easily, and I also want to see the future you aim for. I strongly believe that the tasks set out before us will bring the Known World closer to lasting peace." Amelia wasn't naive. She knew, both from the history of her world and what she'd learned from this one, that peace was often won.

It was something that had to be fought for and proactively maintained. If she wanted to end the racial divisions between humans and demons, she couldn't be a passive observer. She would need to act, especially against those who opposed her desire.

"So I just frame it as part of my great duty, my noble desire, and it becomes easy?" she asked, feeling her mouth form into a nervous smile.

"It doesn't become easy," Serena explained.

"It only becomes easier to do hard things." Amelia looked at Serena for a long while. Two pairs of crimson eyes, locked together with complicated emotions.

"Fine," Amelia said.

"Fine?"

"Fine, I'll trust and listen to you. If you ask me to do, do… You know…" Amelia looked up briefly before locking eyes with Serena again.

"I will. Just… promise me it'll be the best way, and not a convenient shortcut or anything like that."

"I promise," Serena said, a wry smile forming on her face.

"Believe me, I don't take these things lightly."

"Also!" Amelia raised a finger.

"If my mental health is such a concern, then let me do one thing to guarantee I can cope with the consequences of my actions! One thing! One small request!" She felt her eyes grow wide as she brimmed with sudden excitement. Serena would let her, wouldn't she?

"What is it?" Serena asked tentatively. Amelia made her request, prompting Serena to laugh. Amelia thought her girlfriend would reject it, but then Serena paused, and after some consideration, said, "Fine. I'll allow it. But you have to take responsibility for it, understand?"

"Mmm!" Amelia nodded enthusiastically.

"I will! It'll be good luck!" She giggled, providing a much-needed release of emotion after the serious discussion.

"Well then," Serena stood up.

"I'm putting my horns down for a few hours."

"You're sleeping?" Amelia asked, tilting her head.

"Want me to heal you?"

"No." Serena shook her head.

"I want to take the opportunity to process everything that's happened. Organise my thoughts. My officers can carry out their duties in the meantime. Besides, I'm concerned that if I talk to that Menes fellow again, I might… I might…" Serena trailed off, but Amelia didn't miss her girlfriend tapping the hilt of her sword. Serena had informed Amelia that she didn't want the Arakian captain or his strange crewmen to know that she was on board. It was a shame, as she'd been excited to talk to someone from Ishaq!

It was unlikely they would meet anytime soon, at least, not until the ship had recovered enough for Amelia to wear her disguise as Lia Liona again. The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there. As Serena climbed onto the hammock, Amelia joined her.

Serena closed her eyes, and Amelia's mind took turns in wrestling with the significance of the mental commitment she'd just made—the recognition of what she might have to do to satisfy her grand duty —and the delight and excitement at getting Serena's permission for her request. It wasn't long until Serena's breathing became soft and gentle. And, after that, it wasn't long until Amelia joined her.

Considering the Vengeance's recent agitation, it wasn't surprising to Serena when she found herself standing on a dimly lit staircase, faintly illuminated by rusty oil lanterns that creaked and wobbled in time with the noise of waves from outside. A familiar ethereal fog faintly danced across the floor, flowing down the staircase into the ship's depths.

"I'm dreaming again," Serena murmured to herself. Her voice, like all noise in her dream, sounded muffled and delayed, arriving in her ears a fraction of a second after she felt herself speak. She looked around. The surrounding darkness seemed invasive, held back only by the flickering oil lanterns. Serena reached out, unhooking a lantern and casting it about. There, as she illuminated the door to her side, the lantern light reflected off the brass lettering nailed into the thick, heavy wood. Fourth Deck.

She looked down to see that her left hand had moved by itself and had already grasped the doorknob.

"No," she muttered, forcefully removing her hand.

"The fourth deck is off limits, even to the captain." She mumbled the mantra to herself and was about to turn away and explore when her eyes caught sight of the keyhole.

"Not a dream…" she whispered.

"This is a memory. The ship is showing me this." It was hard for her to think, but she managed to retain enough clarity to remember Anathor's explanation. The first time this dreamlike memory retelling happened was shortly after Amelia blasted Aseco's divine healing throughout the ship. Then, it happened again in Kenhoro, after she'd consumed inappropriate amounts of loqua at her girlfriend's encouragement.

And now, after Amelia had disturbed the Vengeance's peace through her formation of Kanaxai in the storm-laden skies of the Southern Passage, Serena was once again experiencing the phenomenon. Focusing on the keyhole, Serena swallowed. She slowly bent down, first positioning herself onto one knee, then moving her face towards the small opening. With only the slightest hesitation, Serena aligned her eye with the keyhole, looking through it and into the darkness beyond. Only, there wasn't darkness. An eye.

An eye with deep blue irises. An eye filled with sorrow. Through the keyhole, something or someone was looking at Serena. Serena jerked back, falling to the floor while letting out a soundless scream. Her heartbeat exploded, her blood rushed in her ears, her chest tightened, and she felt a shiver consume her body, almost making her drop the lantern. For a few seconds, she could do nothing but look at the wooden ceiling as terror gripped her mind and body. Her instincts flared, warning her that she was in danger.

Only… Nothing happened. Serena swallowed, blinking as her heartbeat returned to normal. She slowly recovered, trying to process what she'd just seen. I shouldn't have done that, Serena thought. Footsteps suddenly sounded from above, their thudding producing a rhythmic beat as they disturbed the unnatural fog. They slowly faded away as their owner made their way through the corridors in the upper decks.

"Who's there!?" Serena shouted. She clambered to her feet and rushed up the wooden stairwell, holding the lantern high to try and pierce the unforgiving darkness. Perhaps it was because this memory had dreamlike qualities, but Serena's foggy mind had already forgotten the rabid terror it had just experienced. She rushed through the ship. Every time her foot hit the wooden floor, it sent a dull thud reverberating throughout the space.

The dreamlike fog would scatter momentarily, only to claw its way back around her ankles. She turned corner after corner, chasing the figure until she was stopped by a door with another set of familiar brass letters. Captain's Quarters. Serena paused, taking a deep breath. She knew, somehow, that there would be answers through this door. The mysterious captain beyond would give her more this time. How did she know that? Was it her connection to the ship?

Either way, now it was time to push forward, to learn more about the unknowns of the Known World. Serena shook her head and, steeling her resolve, pushed open the door.

"You're here," the aged captain intoned, his voice coarse. The man, like before, sat in a chair, facing away from her. His leather captain's hat hid his face, but she could see his grey hair and beard. Unlike before, Serena wasn't standing in a field of endless fog. This time, there was a faded and blurred outline of a room and some furniture. Shelves, a desk, and rectangular shapes on a faded wall that might be paintings. Was this what the Vengeance's captain's quarters looked like, long ago?

Serena opened her mouth to speak, only to find that her mouth moved on its own, utterly independent of her mind.

"It had to be done," Serena said.

"It was our only path. It's still our only path." What's going on? she thought. Whose words are these?

"You've committed a cardinal sin," the captain growled, flecks of anger finding their way into his inflexion.

"A necessary sin," Serena countered, unable to stop herself from responding.

"She wanted it. They both wanted it." This is the memory's words, she thought. I'm playing the role of someone in this conversation. But who? And was it their memory? Or someone else's?

"You should have stopped them!" the captain shouted suddenly, agitating the surrounding fog. The man's hands squeezed tightly. Serena noticed that his skin was rough and leathery, a sign of years of hard work.

"You've meddled in things beyond our understanding!" The captain suddenly sighed. He began rubbing his forehead.

"There will be a punishment… The gods won't stand by…" Serena swallowed nervously. Or at least, she thought she swallowed. It might have been the action of the person she was replacing in this reenactment.

"We will act quickly," Serena said, "before the Enemy realises what we've done."

"She'll die. Her body won't hold. It's too much power."

"She knows this," Serena explained.

"She knew. They both did. They still chose to do it."

"What we lost today… what was sacrificed today… will resonate for a thousand years."

"What's done is done," Serena said, feeling her voice take on a note of finality.

"We have no choice now but to continue till the end. This is their duty, this is our duty."

"Madness…" the captain whispered, his voice pained.

"My heart… yearns… it wishes with every fibre of its being, that we could have found another way." The man clenched his fist again. This time, Serena heard his knuckles pop.

"The Enemy will never guess we went down this path. They cannot conceive of committing such a sin. As you say, we have time. Perhaps… perhaps enough time to stabilise them. Both of them."

"... She told me it wouldn't be possible," Serena said after a moment of hesitation.

"Is there a way?"

"The old temples of power," the captain said.

"The moon altars."

"Those temples"—Serena swallowed—"are in enemy territory."

"If she can even adapt slightly to this… this blessing, then her power will be enough to take you there. Form an expedition. Choose only from her Trusted. Once there, she can be melded with the rest." Serena remained quiet. The person who was originally in her place must have been in deep thought at this moment.

"The temple," she said after a dozen seconds.

"Will it be enough?"

"It brought us back, didn't it? Haha…" the captain chuckled, his laughter deep and gravelly.

"What terrible luck we've had. We always end up on the losing side, don't we? More than a thousand years ago, we fought for Infanta Joana in A Pátria. We were desperate then, and are desperate now. Who knows, perhaps we might win this one." They fought for whom? Serena thought. Where?

"We? You'll help?" Serena questioned.

"I shall," the captain responded firmly.

"I'll take what remains I can. Losing my life is a small price to pay if I can stabilise what was shattered. If we're lucky, then one day, maybe she could come back…"

"Come with us, Father," Serena protested.

"We'll take both of them together. They will…" Serena trailed off. She didn't miss the deflation of her voice and the lack of hope that came with it.

"They must stay apart," the grizzled captain explained.

"You know this as well as I. We must go our separate ways. One temple won't be enough for both. We must prioritise the princess. I won't come back from this, and neither will you. Those temples will take their pound of flesh. You must choose the expedition members carefully. Only the most loyal…"

"There must be a better way," Serena protested weakly.

"Too late…" the captain muttered.

"You must protect the girl…" He removed his hat, exposing more of his grey hair and the edges of an aged face. Once again, Serena was reminded that this captain was human.

"I'm heading to the ice-lands to do my part. As for you…" The human captain battered the side of his hat, knocking dirt and dust loose. The rhythmic beating of his palm against the brown leather sent shockwaves throughout the space, stirring up the fog and causing the faded and blurred surroundings to wobble.

"The pair of you must go to the desert," he continued.

"The old temple of Pyrynn is your best chance. The Enemy won't look there; the desert is too hostile for them. I wish…" The aged captain suddenly stood up and turned. There, Serena locked eyes with him. He wore the face of a weary, pained man. The face of a man who'd seen too much. His eyes were a dull grey, but despite that, Serena saw the cold determination within.

"I wish there were another way, but to win this war, this is the duty you must finish."

"Father…" she began.

"Do your duty, Son," he commanded.

"Finish it." Then, with a definite sense of finality, he spoke again.

"Finish it, Anathor."